“That’s shitty.”
“But we think she’s in remission now.”
“That’s great,” I said, truly happy to hear some good news. “That’s really great.”
“Your mom was going to try and adopt her.”
“What?” I sat upright and my hand grasped the phone tighter.
“She was waiting to do it after she left your dad. She hadn’t told Shelby yet, but she had discussed it with me.”
“Why didn’t she tell me?” I frowned. “I didn’t even know she volunteered.”
“She started coming to the hospital when you joined the marines. She said she felt like God would protect you if she spent time with other children. She worried about you so much.”
“I didn’t know.” Why hadn’t she told me?
“She was going to adopt Shelby?” My voice held disbelief.
“I don’t know how to say this, Bryce, but Shelby is your sister.”
I dropped the phone onto the ground and tried to picture the little girl’s face. There had been something so familiar about her. “I want to see her.”
“You can come with me tomorrow if you want.”
“Yes. I want to come.” I paused. “How do you know I’m her brother?”
Luke sighed before speaking. “I replaced the orphanage’s computers and software a few years ago. That put me in contact with a lot of personal information.”
“So you know about my dad and Lexi’s mom?”
“Yes.” His voice was clipped.
“But she doesn’t know.” It was a statement and not a question.
“I wanted her to tell me about the affair when she was ready.”
“But Shelby’s her sister as well.”
“It wasn’t my place to tell her,” he sighed. “She doesn’t even know that I know.”
“Are we going to tell her?” I didn’t know if I could drop another bomb on her.
“Shelby would love to get to know you both. She’s a wonderful young girl.”
“So you know my sister better than I do.” It felt weird saying the word sister. “She’s going to be okay now, right?” I knew it was selfish of me but I didn’t know if I could handle getting to know her, only for her to die.
“She’s okay now, Bryce. She’s in remission,” Luke sighed. “She’s a survivor, Bryce. She’s a good kid. She needs a brother to love her.”
“You’ve loved her like a brother though, haven’t you?”
“I love her.” His words were firm and wistful. “Your mom loved her as well. And Shelby loved your mom.”
“I’m glad.” I smiled, a big, wide, true smile. “I’m glad she had someone in her life who made her happy.”
“She was a good woman. Everyone in town loved her.” Luke paused. “She wouldn’t want you to blame yourself, Bryce. It’s not your fault. Just like Eddie’s death wasn’t your fault.”
“You’re a good guy, Luke,” I sighed. “Thanks. I’ll meet you tomorrow at the hospital?”
“Yeah, I’ll see you there around noon.”
“Okay, I’ll see you then.” I jumped up, suddenly feeling alive. I had a sister. A little sister. It didn’t feel quite real. She could have been my daughter. I laughed at the irony. Maybe I’d have a kid soon. Maybe I could convince Lexi to forgive me and we could start a family. And I’d be a better man. I’d be a stand-up guy. A family guy. I’d spend the rest of my life atoning for my sins. I’d be the guy my mom wanted me to be.
First, Lexi and I could get married. We could get housing at Notre Dame and I could get a degree, maybe I’d become a teacher. Or maybe I could go to theology school. Spend my life in service to God. And then, when we graduated, we could start a family. And buy a house. We’d be a real family. I knew that Lexi would like that. We’d be happy. I would spend the rest of my life showing her how much she meant to me. I had messed up with Anna, but I wasn’t going to make the same mistake twice. I would prove to her that I was a good man. That the guy she had loved in high school was the real me and not a figment of her imagination. I could be that guy. I could grow up. I could be the man she wanted me to be, that I needed to be.
I grabbed my phone to call her. I wanted to hear her voice. I wanted to hold her. I needed somebody right now. I knew she wouldn’t mind if I held her in my arms and cried. I just needed to be with someone. I needed to feel complete. I needed it more than I needed oxygen to breathe.
Chapter 5
Lexi
My phone battery died as I rounded the corner. But I didn’t care. I didn’t want to talk on the phone. I needed to see his face and talk to him in person. I finally arrived and parked my car next to his. This was it, then. I took a deep breath and shook my hands out.
“Hey, you.”
“Hey.” I looked up and saw him standing in front of me. “I didn’t even see you there.”
“I guess you need to pay more attention to your surroundings, then.” He laughed and I breathed a sigh of relief. Everyone was normal. As I had thought it would be. As I had known in my heart it would be.
“Yeah, I don’t want any scary bears coming after me.”
“Especially not if you’ve eaten any honey lately.”
“Or chocolate.”
“Or salt and vinegar chips.”
“Or McDonalds fries.”
“Or Whopper Jrs., without the pickles.”
“And added cheese.”
“Oh yes, we can’t forget the added cheese.” He grinned and I pulled him close to me. I saw the surprise in his eyes and I grinned back at him and leaned in and kissed him. His lips were sweet and firm, and I felt a slight shock run through me as our lips met. He pulled back from me slightly with an awe-struck look on his face.
“Wow, Lexi. Just wow.”
“What did you think?” I asked, shyly.
“I think that’s the kiss I’ve been waiting for my whole life.” Luke shook his head as if he couldn’t quite believe what had happened. “I don’t really know what to say.”
“I think right now you should be quiet.” I put my finger to his lips. “I want to talk to you.”
“I won’t say no to that.” He bit the tip of my finger and I squealed.
“Luke!”
“Sorry.” He laughed, looking like he wasn’t sorry at all.