‘Okay, maybe there is something on.’ He’s so cute, trying to restrain a grin. ‘But I can’t tell you right now.’
‘Is it bad?’
‘No. It’s good, I think.’ He’s totally enjoying this.
‘Okay, now I really want to know.’ I pout out my lip. ‘Please.’
Chuckling under his breath, he reaches up and touches my bottom lip with his fingertip. ‘That trick’s not going to work on me.’
‘What trick?’ I ask innocently.
He gives me a look. ‘Are you trying to tell me that you don’t purposefully pout your lip out when you’re trying to get your way?’ he asks and I get a guilty look on my face. ‘Yeah, see. I can read you just as well as you can read me.’ He winks at me then pulls me in for a kiss, dropping the football to the floor. Our tongues instantly tangle and within seconds he’s picking me up and carrying me toward the bed.
I have every intention of pulling off his clothes and re-experiencing the moment we shared in the car a few weeks ago, but then the door swings open and Harper comes walking in.
‘Oh shit.’ She halts in the doorway when she spots us on the bed, legs entwined, bodies pressed together, hands all over each other – thankfully no one’s clothes have come off.
‘Sorry,’ I apologize, sitting up while Kayden remains lying down, his fingers sketching up and down my back. ‘We were just …’ How am I supposed to finish that sentence? We were just about to have hot, sweaty sex? Yeah, that sentence is not coming out of my mouth.
Harper dithers in the doorway, hugging her books to her chest. ‘I can come back.’
I shake my head and hop off my bed. ‘No, it’s okay. I needed to run to the store anyway.’ I reach for my jacket as Kayden begrudgingly gets off the bed and picks up his football.
‘Hey, could you by chance pick up a roll of tape for me?’ Harper asks as she drops her books onto the bed. ‘I ran out last night.’
I nod. ‘Sure.’
‘Thanks.’ She forces a smile as she starts to unbutton her jacket. ‘Actually, Callie, before you leave … could I talk to you?’ She flicks the last button undone then sets her coat on the bedpost, her eyes flicking to Kayden before they land on me. ‘Alone maybe?’
‘Um, yeah, sure.’ I turn to Kayden who shoots me a puzzled look. ‘Can I meet you out in the car?’
He nods warily. ‘Sure.’ He softly kisses my forehead then glances at Harper before walking out the door. Once it clicks shut, I face Harper. ‘So what’s up?’
‘It’s nothing really.’ But her expression suggests otherwise as she sinks down on the bed, her shoulders slumped. ‘Honestly, I don’t know how to bring it up without you getting mad.’
‘I won’t get mad.’ I don’t know what else to say, since I don’t know where this is going.
Sighing, she fiddles with a strand of her hair, twisting it around her finger. ‘The other day I overheard you and Seth talk about stuff.’ She’s staring at her hair, completely fixated on it. ‘About something that happened to you.’
‘I’m not sure what you mean.’ I sit down on my bed so we’re facing each other. ‘Seth and I have said a lot of things,’ I tell her and then try to make a joke because she looks so sad. ‘Particularly Seth. He loves to talk.’
A tiny smile rises on her lips, but her eyes still seem filled with sadness as she looks up at me. ‘Well, it was the other day. I think you guys thought I had my headphones on and was listening to music, but I was actually trying to find something to listen to so I heard a little bit of your conversation … about a guy doing stuff to you.’ She winces as she says it, and even though I’m used to talking about this aloud, I still wince myself.
‘Yeah …’ Again, I’m unsure of what to say.
‘Sorry,’ she says quickly. ‘I’m sure you’re wondering why I’m saying this and the truth is … well, the truth is I heard you say something about how you were feeling a lot better and that you have been since you talked to your parents about it. I was kind of wondering’ – her gaze drops to the space on the floor between our feet – ‘how you went about that.’
‘Telling my parents that I was … raped?’ It’s still so hard to say aloud, even though I’ve been openly talking about it for a while.
Again, she winces. ‘Yeah … that.’ She looks up at me and although she doesn’t say anything about it, I think I suddenly understand why she’s bringing this up. I know that pained look she’s trying to keep trapped inside her because I did the same thing for years.
I’m not sure if I should ask her yet if she was raped. Stuff like this can be tricky – getting someone to tell the truth can be tricky. I should know since it took me almost seven years of carrying around this dark heaviness inside me, afraid to let it out because I was afraid of what people would think of me and honestly, I was afraid of Caleb, too.
‘You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.’ Harper’s words rush out of her. Right now, she seems like a completely different person, but that’s because she’s vulnerable and scared.
‘No, it’s okay.’ I lift my shoulders to build up some confidence. ‘When it came to telling my parents, I just sort of sat them down and told them. There’s really not a right or easy way to do it, other than to do it. I do think that getting to the point where you decide you’re going to tell someone is the hardest part, though.’
‘Did you struggle with it?’ she asks. ‘I mean, with getting up the courage to tell someone.’
I suck in a gradual inhale through my nose to keep the emotions inside me so I won’t freak her out. ‘Yeah, it took me almost seven years.’
Her eyes snap wide. ‘How old were you when it happened?’
‘Twelve.’
‘Jesus, Callie, that’s horrible.’
‘Yeah, it was, but I’m trying to move on.’ I pause, wondering if it’s the right time to ask her something yet, but then I realize that there might not be a right time and I just have to do it. ‘How old were you?’
She sighs, her shoulders slumping. ‘Is it that obvious why I’m asking all this?’
‘It might not be for someone else, but you have this look on your face right now that I’m kind of familiar with.’