Any second now she’d wake and hurl herself back to life. Any second now I would catch her and hold her while she sobbed from whatever filth she’d relived.
She would turn to me for help. And I would be there for her.
You almost raped her today. You’re a f**king ass**le.
The memory compounded my headache. How could I want to hurt someone who ruled me?
My stomach knotted, acknowledging the truth. Tess had so much power over me. More than anyone in my entire life.
She’s my f**king queen.
The darkness gave way to light for a brief moment—the roles switched in my head. Abusive master to willing slave.
My eyes snapped wide. I snorted in the darkness. I’m the esclave.
Her messy hair snagged on the pillows, throwing herself onto her side. Her tiny hands fisted while her body turned in on itself.
Standing over her, I forced myself to pick up the splintered pieces of my heart from this afternoon. I was done suffering the gauntlet of right and wrong. No matter how much I wanted to accept her flawless gift of absolute ownership, I wanted more.
I deserved more.
I was f**king besotted. She would never just be a slave. And I would never just be her master. Our connection went past flesh and blood. It was soul-deep and ever-lasting and I refused to f**k it up with one mistake.
We’d reached a pinnacle in our relationship. The ugly truth was aired. It was time for decisions.
Fuck letting lies win. Fuck letting the past ruin our future.
Tess and I were stronger than words. And I refused to let them wedge us apart and destroy the only good thing in my life.
I would stop this—end all this decay before there was nothing left but rottenness and nothing to salvage.
I would start a new beginning. A clean slate.
I had to do something drastic.
My eyes widened. You already know what to do. Fuck, why hadn’t I thought of it sooner?
My headache kept pace with my heart as I glared at Tess. I’d wasted so much time.
Lefebvre and the shower.
It worked last time.
Could it work again?
Energy exploded through my limbs. Looking at Tess one more time, I stormed into the bathroom.
Turning on the light, the glare stung my eyes as I hunted for my clothes. Collecting my trousers off the floor, I jerked them on, followed by a black shirt I’d unpacked before.
My reflection showed a man sleep-dishevelled and wired to his f**king eyeballs, but for once there was a glimmer of hope. Glorious f**king hope.
This is wrong. Wrong on so many levels.
Ignoring the seeping worry in my veins, I didn’t give myself time to second guess. Fishing into my back pocket, I grabbed my cell-phone and punched in a number I’d known by heart since I was five years old.
It took a while to connect. The ringing sent spasms of pain through my head. I stabbed a finger at my reflection. “This has to f**king work, so don’t screw it up.” The mirror stole my threat, echoing back the image of a lunatic. Doubt reared its unwanted head. My eyes looked almost soulless; my five o’ clock shadow unkempt. The tiny scars on my cheeks, brow, and nose glistened like tiny crescent moons.
Goddammit, pick up the f**king phone.
The number rang and rang.
“Bonjour?” a sleepy female voice came down the line.
About time.
“Suzette. You’re going to do something for me.”
Shuffling, followed by a yawn. “You need something at two in the morning, and you’re not even here?” Her tone mixed with annoyance and obedience. “Did you forget something?”
Before Tess came into my life Suzette was the only female I let get close. We’d never been more than saver and slave, then employee and employer, but our connection had grown to friendship. She pushed me even when it was dangerous to do so. She saw the real me—the one I never acknowledged—and encouraged me regardless.
When Tess arrived it was Suzette who gave me permission to be a bastard. What were her words? Be like them for a while, because even on your worst days, you don’t rival what they did to me.
I’d never asked her what she’d lived through; I didn’t need to. She told me in her own way—in the panic attacks and sudden terror of my temper. But beneath the small fractures, she was strong.
“I need you to arrange a wedding.”
Suzette giggled. “I thought you eloped so you didn’t have to do any of that?”
I imagined her rolling her eyes as if I was some stupid child who’d forgotten his lunch for the day. She’d taken the role of caring for me a bit too well.
“That was the original plan. Oui.”
Another laugh. “But now you’ve changed your mind and want an over-the-top, completely impractical wedding?” A pause. “Did Tess refuse your crazy idea of marrying in the middle of nowhere?”
I snorted. “No. She didn’t refuse.” Even after everything I’d done today she still wanted me. The knowledge would never fail to rip the breath right from my lungs.
“It’s hardly a dream location for a girl. She deserves more than a pelican for a witness.”
“Suzette,” I growled. “Instead of undermining me, how about you agree to f**king help.”
My mind raced, forming the crazy idea faster and faster. Tess would have every reason to kill me. She would probably try.
I ran a hand down my face, shaking my head. God—this was f**king dangerous.
“So—why do you need my help?” Suzette prompted.
My mind switched from what I was about to do to the wedding. I didn’t want big—hell, I didn’t want anything more than someone joining Tess’s life to mine—but Tess had said she wanted Suzette there.
She wanted Brax, too.
No f**king way was that little cunt going to be at my wedding. There was only so much I would tolerate.
I paced over the tiles, gripping my chin in thought. The original plan was still my favourite—but I wanted to give Tess the world. And I would.
“You’re going to arrange our wedding.”
“What?” Something banged in the background; Suzette yelped.
My heart exploded. Intruders. Fucking traffickers.
“Suzette!”
Suzette made a sucking noise. “Sorry. It’s dark. I ran into the door. Bashed my fingers.”
“Goddammit…” I breathed out heavily. Franco left a decent team of security in Blois but who knew what the underworld morons would do to get to me. I didn’t want any more blood from people I cared about.
My patience was wearing thin. I wanted them to make a move now, so I didn’t have to sit in the shadows and wait.