“I don’t know why I’m defending him, but I believe he left to protect you. For the first time since he met you, he put you first.”
I let out a hard cold laugh that didn’t sound like me. “How can taking away the reason my heart beats be good for me?”
Marcus took my arm. “Jax knew when he met you he wouldn’t be able to keep you. He knew you wouldn’t fit in his world. I blame myself for pursuing you in front of him, because that is what broke his resolve to stay away from you. He couldn’t handle the jealousy. For the first time in his life, he wanted something he could not have, and he fought it for you. I watched him. But then he caved, and when he did, it was the beginning of the end. I hate him for not being strong enough. I hate him for hurting you. But more than any of that, I hate him because he stole your heart and I don’t think it will ever be the same.”
I didn’t want to fight with Marcus. He had come to get me out of the darkness when no one else did. He was a friend. My first friend ever. I knew he would never understand that I didn’t regret one moment I spent with Jax. The pain I was enduring now was worth every moment of the time I spent with him.
So, I touched his arm and turned away from his sad face. “You’re right about one thing. My heart, he took it with him.”
* * * *
The next few days, my darkness slowly faded. My memories began to brighten the darkest spots. I couldn’t go back to Jax’s house and work. My time there was over. After a week of being home, Jessica came to my room.
“If we are going to eat, we need money. No one is going to hire me when I am ready to give birth at any moment. I know you’re hurting, but you’re going to be starving and hot if you don’t find a job.”
I had been expecting this. I knew our cash was low, and Jessica was right, she couldn’t work. I was the able body around here. She brought me a piece of paper.
“Call Ms. Mary. She said she could get you a job if you wanted her help. What she can get you is going to be tons better than anything you can find on your own. Also, the Stones left all their summer employees severance pay since they were all laid off a month and a half early. She said she was mailing the check.”
I flinched, and Jessica sighed and sat down on my bed. “I know thinking about him hurts, and you’re so full of pride taking money from him is hard for you, but right now, with me about to have a baby, we need this money.”
I pulled my knees up under my chin. “Yes, but the family left early because of me. Why should they have to pay me because I forced their departure?”
Jessica sighed and shook her head. “You didn’t do anything wrong but fall in love with a rock star. I can’t say I blame you, he was a hottie, but a relationship with someone like him was impossible from the beginning. They left early, and you lost your job because of it. They owe you like everyone else.”
I shook my head. “No, they owe me nothing!”
Jessica stood up. “Well, regardless of what you think. We will take the check and pay our bills, and fill our kitchen and go buy diapers. Stop being so selfish and open your eyes to the facts, Sadie. We are about to have another mouth to feed, and no amount of your whining and wallowing in self-pity or pride is going to supply our needs. So stop it, and face the facts.”
Jessica turned and left my room. One thing I agreed with was we needed money. So, I got up and got dressed because I was off to find myself a job.
* * *
Chapter Sixteen
Ms. Mary was well connected. For three weeks, I’d been doing the filing at a local lawyer’s office. Apparently, Ms. Mary’s neighbor worked for a lawyer, and the lawyer needed someone to assist his secretary. With Ms. Mary’s shining recommendation, he hired me and was paying me exactly what I had been making. When school started, I would go directly to his office, and then work until six each night. Mary Ellis, his secretary, was around Jessica’s age and easy to work with. I enjoyed the work, and at times I even got so busy I didn’t think about Mr. Greg and his war stories, or Ms. Mary and her laughter. I had finished my third week, and my paycheck was in my hands. It wasn’t really needed yet, considering that the severance pay from Jax had been ridiculous, and Jessica refused to let me dispose of it. Ms. Mary had assured me everyone’s had been just as ridiculous. It mollified me a little, but not enough. Somehow, I still felt bought off. I hated thinking of it that way, but I did.
I parked my bike by the door, and a scream came from inside the house. My heart started racing. I jerked the door open and ran inside. Jessica was bent over, standing in the kitchen, and bloody water was running down her legs and pooling on the floor. “What’s happening?” I asked, panicked.
“Call 911 now!”
Her cell phone was lying on the counter top, and I grabbed it. She screamed again. My hands shook so badly it was hard to dial. Something was terribly wrong.
“911, what is your emergency?”
“My mother, she’s bleeding and in a lot of pain, she is screaming. She’s eight months pregnant.” My words were so rushed I hoped they made sense.
“Help is on the way now. Tell me what your mother is doing.” The voice sounded so calm.
“She is breathing hard and sitting in a chair.”
“Ask her how she feels.”
I looked at her and all color had vanished. Her eyes were big and scared. Seeing my mother worried and in pain made me want to panic.
“How do you feel?” I asked shakily
“It’s okay right now, but that doesn’t mean anything. It will come back.” She gritted her teeth and closed her eyes.
“She’s fine now, but she said it would come back.”
“She’s correct, it will come back. Your mother is in labor. Now I need you to remain calm and get her a cold wet washcloth and wipe her face. It will help soothe her.”
I did as the voice told me. Jessica sat silently while I washed her face.
“How is she?” the voice asked
“She’s okay. I washed her face, and she is breathing easier.”
“That’s good. The baby isn’t coming too quickly. Now, if you will get her some ice chips, or crushed ice in a cup to suck on, this will also help.”
I started to go get some ice cubes and crush them when I heard the ambulance sirens outside.
“The ambulance is here,” I told the voice on the phone.
“Good. Then everything is going to be fine, and you did really well. I will let you go and talk to them.”