“You should have gone home.”
“I told you I was staying until you came out,” I remind her softly. “Wanna talk?”
She takes a deep breath and tears roll down her cheeks. “I…” I grab her as her legs buckle, and that shows me just how weak she is.
She’s given up on everything.
Myra clutches at me and buries her face in my shoulder as she cries. It’s the same cries as yesterday – hard and filled with unimaginable pain. Cries that make me want to join her.
I hold her the way I held Roxy when she broke down. I hold Myra until she’s exhausted and can’t cry anymore.
“Let’s go downstairs.” I wrap an arm around her waist. “Have a hot drink and some toast and you’ll feel better.”
“I’m not hungry, Kyle. I just want my baby girl back.”
I swallow harshly. You and me both. “A hot drink at least. Tea.”
She hesitates, but gives in. She knows I’m not giving in.
I sit her at the kitchen table and turn my back as Ray comes in. “Is Iz still here?”
“No, Son,” Ray answers. “She left late last night after making sure I was okay.”
Three cups it is then.
I join my second parents at the table. “I can’t believe she’s disappeared.”
“You were our last hope,” Ray says sadly. “We thought she might be with you.”
“No. I haven’t seen her since Friday night.” Guilt snakes through me. Fuck.
“She left on Saturday. Myra sent her home from the café early and when we got back, she was gone. Didn’t think much of it. It’s not exactly a surprise when she takes off – she did it a few times after Cam died – but Selena always knew where she was, and she always came back. Five nights is the longest she’s been gone, and we’re the last people to see her.”
“Have you called the police?” I look at Myra and nudge the mug closer to her. “Drink.”
“No,” she answers in a small voice, lifting the mug. “I thought… I thought she’d come back by now. I’m too scared to call them. I’m too scared something bad has happened to her.”
“Isn’t it better to know?”
“No. Cam, and then her… If anything has happened to her… I don’t know what I’d do, Kyle.” She shakes. “I can’t lose both of my babies. I can’t.”
Tears glisten in Ray’s eyes as he pulls her close and looks over her shoulder. I shake my leg to keep my own composure. Someone here has to be strong and it has to be me. I need to be the glue that holds them together.
I owe my best friend that.
“Right.” I stand. “Where are the keys to the café?”
“What?” Ray asks.
“Someone has to open the café. You need that café to live. If it isn’t open, you aren’t making money. I’ve been there enough time when it’s opened to know how it works.”
“Kyle, you don’t have to.”
“No, I do,” I say firmly and hold out my hand. “I’ll call the girls. Iz and Louisa can cook and I’ll stay out front with Selena. I’ll even put an order in for you.”
“Kyle.”
“Keys.” I give my hand a shake for good measure. “You two need each other and I need to do something useful, so let me have them.”
~
“She’s really that bad?” Louisa asks from across the counter.
I nod. “She’s too scared to call the cops. I think that says it all, don’t you?”
“Poor Aunt Myra,” she whispers. “I can’t believe Roxy would do this. She hasn’t exactly thought of anyone since Cam died, but I didn’t think she’d be this selfish.”
“I guess she felt like she has nothing left.” I swallow. “I’m partly to blame. I walked away from her, Lou. I thought it might be the kick she needed – I didn’t think she’d run off to Portland. I took a risk and it wasn’t worth it.”
She punches me in the arm. Hard.
“The hell was that for?”
“This is not your fault!” she yells. “This is no one’s fault. It’s not even Roxy’s. This is a f**k up none of us saw coming. You didn’t know she’d do this when you walked. And y’know what? I’m glad you did. Walking away from her was the best damn thing you could have done, Kyle. Eventually, she’ll get the kick she needs, and we all know you’ll be waiting for her.”
“How do you know that?”
“Because your heart breaks in your eyes every time someone says her name.”
It breaks everywhere else too.
“Fine. Don’t you have cooking to do?”
“Yep. I’m just taking a moment to think this would be a really good story.”
I shake my head and direct her toward the kitchen. “Go.”
The bell above the door rings as the Stevens sisters come in. “Is she back yet?”
“No. We still haven’t found her.”
“Oooh dear,” Marie fusses.
“I wish we could do something to help,” Iyla adds.
“You can,” I smile at them sadly. “You can hope.”
Chapter Twenty-Seven – Roxy
I’m trying to fight the pounding in my head and throbbing in my cheek by staring at the blank screen of my cell phone. The afternoon sun is glaring through the dirty window, illuminating my bed and dancing off the screen.
I haven’t switched the phone on since I left Verity Point. It’s stayed in the drawer of the night stand, off, probably collecting messages. Such a huge part of me wants to turn it on to see them, but I know they’ll make me go back and I can’t.
I head out of my motel room and walk downtown. The fresh air helps to clear my head, and when my legs get sore from walking, I detour to McDonalds and order a Happy Meal. I open the box and pull out the toy. Optimus Prime.
Kyle’s favorite.
Sigh. I tuck the tiny figure into my pocket and stare out the window as I eat. If it’s not Cam, its Kyle, and vice versa. One of them is always in my head and hurting my heart. Time flies as I sit here, letting the world pass me by.
And I’m wondering if I’m numb always. Is there too much pain inside me that I really can’t feel anything anymore? No. I can still feel – it’s why they encompass my every waking moment, stealing my thoughts.
I stare at my cell again and turn it on, switching it to airplane mode before any messages come through. It’s to the point I don’t even know the date. Last night was a wake up call, a kick up the ass, but that doesn’t change the fact I’ve spent all day every day in a state of oblivion since I left home.