“What?” I stiffened. This was a part of the story I wasn’t expecting.
“I explained I didn’t know about the debts, but they made it clear that paying them was the best option.” She shivered. I wanted to kill the bastards for threatening her.
“I didn’t have the money. I had virtually no savings, and was already taking out loans for school and childcare. I turned to one of my brother’s friends that I knew could help. I knew this friend wouldn’t tell my parents. I refused to let my dad know he was right, and bringing Tim’s parents into it was out of the question. They would have blamed it on me.”
“Do you still owe this friend money?” I brushed some hair off her face. Her cheeks were damp. I just wanted to make everything better.
“Eight thousand.” She looked down.
“How much was the debt?”
“Over a hundred thousand. The money we got from the government covered most of it, but I had to borrow the rest.”
I tried to contain my anger. Her husband left her with over a hundred grand in gambling debts? “That’s why you worked so much this summer, isn’t it?”
She nodded. “I never should have married Tim. I should have listened to my parents. In a way, this was all my fault.”
“Stop.” I put a finger to her lips. “It’s not your fault.”
“It doesn’t matter either way. I just wish I had the money to go back to school.”
“This friend you borrowed money from, is it a guy?” I couldn’t help but ask.
“Yes. But it’s not like that.”
“What’s his name?” I didn’t want any more surprises. I also knew I’d find a way to pay it off. I wasn’t going to let her feel in debt to anyone.
“Austen.”
“Does he live in Ridgeview?”
“Yes.”
I stroked her back. “Does he know you’re with me?”
“No, but what does that matter?”
“What if he’s trying to take advantage of you, Em?” I didn’t want to hurt her, but she could be really naive and way too trusting. She probably shouldn’t have trusted me.
“He’s a good guy. I saw him when I was home. He told me he was interested, but backed off immediately when he realized I was interested in someone else.”
“Okay. I’m glad you’re telling me all this. I need to know about it.” I was also thrilled she’d picked me over her brother’s friend.
“I wanted to tell you sooner, but I didn’t want you to look down on me.”
“Look down on you? Me? Like I could look down on anyone?” I couldn’t believe she’d worry about that.
“You did something stupid and reckless, but it was one time.” She gripped my shirt in her hand like her life depended on it.
“You think that’s the only stupid thing I’ve done?”
“It isn’t?” She looked up at me. Her face was swollen from crying and all I wanted to do was make it better. Maybe showing her my skeletons would help.
“I played college football for one season.”
She wiped her eyes. “Really? Where?”
“Georgia. Everyone told me to go to UNC, but I wanted SEC, you know?”
“You wanted a more competitive team.”
“Yeah. But, of course that meant I got no playing time. I couldn’t deal, so I drank my anger away.”
“Did you get kicked off the team?” She put her head back down against me.
“Uh huh and that was it for college for me. I came home and suddenly I didn’t want to be the hero anymore. What did it matter if we won state when I was in high school if I couldn’t even hack it in college football?”
She reached over and stroked my cheek. I leaned into her hand. “And the night of the accident, it wasn’t random. I got shit drunk because a girl I used to hook up with decided to tell Ben and Molly about some awful crap I pulled in high school.”
“What did you do?” Her voice was soft.
“I tried to get Ben to cheat on Molly to break them up.”
“Why?” She ran her hands over my t-shirt like she was trying to flatten it out after balling it up so tight.
“Because I was jealous. Pathetic, huh?”
“Not pathetic. Sad, but not pathetic. Did it work?” There was no accusation in her voice, only curiosity.
“Not at all, but a stupid picture I sent was part of why she left town for college.”
“But they’re together now. Isn’t that what matters?” She traced a pattern on my hand. It was her name again.
“I still did it.”
She took my face in her hands. “That’s how I can tell you’re a good man. You care. You really care about it. I think that’s more important than the fact that you did it in the first place.”
“And you say you’re not an optimist?”
She leaned her head on my shoulder. “It looks like we’re two peas in a pod.”
“How do you figure?”
“We’re both broken people looking for a safe place to land. Maybe this time we’ve actually found solid ground.”
I squeezed her hand. “We have.”
“You can take Noah trick or treating.”
I laughed. “I almost forgot that’s where this all began.”
“I didn’t forget. It all started with me getting scared because you mentioned us being serious.”
“You don’t ever have to be scared with me.” I pulled her further onto my lap. I needed her closer.
“That’s impossible. It’s scary to jump into what we’re doing.”
“View it as exciting, not scary. That’s how I see it.” I pushed her sweater off her shoulders, leaving her in just a tank top. I wanted to feel her skin.
“I’ll try.”
“Are you ready for bed?”
“I’m ready to go curl up with you.”
“Me too.” I helped her up, and we moved into her bedroom. If it was possible, I felt even closer to her. I watched her undress, amazed yet again by how beautiful her body was. I was glad she didn’t try to hide herself from me.
She caught me staring. “What?”
“I’m just admiring the view.”
“Very funny.” She pulled a t-shirt over her head.
“It’s not supposed to be a joke.”
“I know.” She joined me on the bed. “I’m glad you’re here.”