I put both hands on the sides of his head and he tipped his face up to look at me.
“I love you so much, Will Anders.”
“I love you, Aud. So much that it consumes me.” All my breath left my body and I leaned down to kiss his upturned lips. He didn’t often say things like that, but when he did, they almost stopped my heart.
He stood and pushed me back until I was sitting on the bed.
“Lie back.” He moved to my feet, removed my boots and my socks before grabbing the bottoms of my jeans and tugging. The problem was that they were skinny jeans and a little tight in the hip area, so all he did was pull me off the bed.
I landed on top of him on the floor.
“Shit!” I said and he also cursed. I scrambled to get off him, hoping I hadn’t injured him in any way.
“Are you okay?” I crouched next to him and he squinted at me.
“Yeah, fine. Only my pride has been kicked in the balls. That did not work out how it was supposed to. I guess I need more practice undressing girls. Why are your pants so tight?”
I started laughing at the look on his face.
“Because I had this delusion that I was a smaller size than I actually am.” I stood up and gave him my hand, but he just used it to pull me back down on the floor with him.
“Hey!”
“Did you swear when you fell on me?” he asked.
“I might have.”
“I like hearing you curse. I mean, you never do, so it’s kind of awesome when you do.”
He lay on his side with me. The floor wasn’t the most comfortable place, but at least I had a rug on this particular spot.
“Do you want to give the pants a shot again?” I asked as he stroked my hair away from my face.
“Yeah, but how about this time we go from the top?” He got up and this time he picked me straight up off the floor. Those athletic muscles came in handy.
He set me down on the bed and scooted down until he was level with the top of my jeans.
“Wait a second. Why do you still have your clothes on?” I’d been so busy anticipating where his mouth was going to go next that I’d completely forgotten that he still had his shirt and pants on.
His answer was to sit up and pull his shirt over his head.
“Better?” I wanted to take it off, but it didn’t really matter, now that it was off. I ran my hands up and down his skin. He was still a little tan from the summer and being outside.
“Much better.” He grinned at me and then went back to work on my pants.
My phone chose that moment to ring. The shrill sound cut through the sweet moment with Will.
We both glanced toward my purse where my phone was screaming. I thought about ignoring it, but the person might leave a voicemail, and then it would beep and I couldn’t deal with that.
“I’m sorry. I’ll just shut it off.”
“Aren’t you going to answer it?”
I picked up my phone to check and see who was calling.
Maria.
Like it had with Will, all the oxygen left my body, but this time, it was for a different reason.
“Aud?” The phone kept going off and I just kept staring at it as Will kept saying my name.
My hand twitched and the phone fell from my hand and I watched as it fell to the floor and shattered.
16
I just kept saying her name, but she was far, far away. I couldn’t reach her. Not even when she dropped her phone and it crashed on the floor and broke. I was always telling her that she needed to upgrade to a better model, or get a case for it or something. Well, now she could. But the phone wasn’t the most important issue right now.
“Aud!” I yelled her name and she finally blinked at me.
“What?” Her voice was robotic, as if she was in some sort of trance.
“Your phone. It rang, you dropped it and then it broke?” I pointed to the remnants of said phone on the floor.
“Oh,” she said, bending down.
“Be careful.” I took her by the shoulders and forced her to go back to the bed. I also found her shirt and handed it to her. This seemed like the kind of moment when she’d want to be clothed.
I picked up the parts of the broken phone and put them in a paper bag I found in her closet before I crouched down in front of her, making her look at me.
“Audrey. You need to tell me what’s going on. You’re scaring me and I want to help you.”
She blinked a few times and took a shaky breath.
“It’s nothing. I just . . . I wasn’t expecting a call and I freaked out a little. That’s all.”
I shook my head.
“That’s not the way you react when you get an unexpected phone call. Someone called you that you don’t want to talk to, and I don’t know why. I just know that you’re not okay right now.”
This time she shook her head.
“Please, Will. I don’t want to talk about it.” And then she crushed her lips over mine, stopping my response. Her hands tore at my hair, at the zipper on my jeans. I wanted to push her away, to tell her to stop, but I didn’t think that was going to work.
For right now, this was what she needed. Maybe later she’d be able to talk. So I let her yank my pants and boxers down, while I undressed her as quickly, reaching for the box of condoms that we’d bought on our way back from Bea’s. I didn’t want to use the ones from the RA again.
Her mouth demanded mine, her body demanded mine. I was all too willing to roll the condom on and thrust hard inside her. She cried out and I worried that I’d hurt her, but she just dug her fingers into my back as she wrapped her legs around me and begged for more. Harder, faster. I did my best to comply with her demands. She’d been almost timid last night when she’d asked if she could be on top, but now she was back to being the commanding goddess, bending me to her will. I’d told her that she consumed me and I wasn’t lying. This girl, the one who was under me and telling me to f**k her harder, owned me. She had the power to obliterate me, like Luke had destroyed the Death Star.
She came hard, probably leaving marks in my back, her voice hoarse in my ear. I was right behind her, panting and exhausted as I arched above her and called out her name.
I wanted to collapse, but I turned and fell on the bed beside her. She was silent, staring at the ceiling. I needed to go clean up, but I didn’t want to leave her yet.
“I’m not going to talk about it,” she said to my unanswered question. Her chest heaved with exertion, and she licked her lips.
“You can’t blame me for being freaked out. You scare the shit out of me sometimes.” I’d never told her that.