I close my eyes, conflict warring inside my crazy damn brain.
Trust him. Don’t. Trust him. Don’t.
The little devil on my left shoulder is hopping with glee. The angel on my right is glaring and shaking her head defiantly. If she wasn’t holy, I’d bet she’d be cursing the f**k out of the sex god stood in front me.
“What about the others? The girls that can’t seem to keep their hands off you. The ones that would do anything for you,” I say. “The ones that would give anything for one night with Samuel Edwards.”
“What about them?” He shrugs carelessly. “I can’t keep my hands off you. I’d do anything for you. I’d give anything for another night with you - for every night with you. Don’t you get it, Jen? I’ve wanted you since I saw you lying on the beach a year and a half ago in Lilac Bay. I’ve wanted you ever since you opened that smart mouth and ripped it out of me.”
I smirk. “I’m kinda good at that.”
“I love your filthy mouth.” He dips his head and bites my bottom lip gently, his lips grazing the surface of mine.
“What if I trust you, Bing? What if I give you everything and it turns to nothing?”
“It won’t turn to nothing,” he replies. “I won’t always be perfect, Jen, baby, but I’ll try to be the best I can. I want you, girl, just you. No-one else. Trust me. Once. That’s all I’m asking.”
Once. It’s easier said than done. It’s easier said than thought.
“I knew the second you chased me with a prawn you’d be a bit of a bad boy.” I whisper.
“I knew the second you stole my sister’s hermit crab you’d be a handful,” he whispers back, a glimmer in his eye.
“What if I can’t take it, Bing? What if I can’t deal with the girls that will throw themselves all over you?”
He runs his fingers through my hair, pushing it away from my face. My head tilts back slightly.
“Then maybe, baby...” He moves in close. “Maybe, you can come to me, and I’ll remind you exactly why they’re nothing more than a shadow in the night and you’re the light.”
“I can’t promise you forever, Bing,” I whisper. “Not until you can prove that everything you just said is it, the real thing.”
He stops and sighs. “You don’t believe me do you?” He shakes his head and turns away. I grab his arm.
“Walk, Bing, and that’s it. This is what you can’t do. I need to know that what you’re saying to me is how you actually feel. It’s what you want.”
“Why?”
“Because I don’t know you. I don’t know as much about you as I want to. Show me you’re being serious, that I’m everything you want, more than sex, then I’m yours. Until then, we’re in uncharted territory.”
His eyes meet mine and in them I see steely resolve, determination. “You’re gonna wish you never challenged me to that, Jennifer Mason.”
“No,” I say, stepping against him. He wraps his arms around me. “I’m hoping I’ll be glad I challenged you to it.”
~
BING
The knowing gleam in my baby sister’s brown eyes is disconcerting to say the least. She’s way more observant than even she knows, and she eyes both me and Jen with amused interest.
“So...” Lexy clicks her tongue. “Anything interesting happen while I was away?”
“Not much,” Jen says, her eyes fixed on the television.
“Ah-huh,” Lexy teases her bottom lip between her teeth. “I’m sure that in a big ol’ city like London absolutely nothing happened.” She rolls her eyes and shoots me a sly glance.
I’m f**ked if she knows.
And she does.
She knows.
So I’m f**ked.
“Nope, Jen’s right.” I shrug. “Absolutely nothing has happened.”
“Nothing in general... or nothing worth sharing?” Lexy grins. An ‘I know’ grin.
“Princess...” Alec puts his hand over her mouth. “‘Nuff.”
“Mm mm mm,” she says behind his hand, and he moves it. “I said, no it’s not. I’m only asking!”
“Asking and interrogating are two different things.”
“Then I’m interrogating.”
I watch as Jen smiles and hides her mouth behind her hand. I want to reach out and touch her, but hey, this whole ‘let’s keep it between us’ thing was her idea. And I know why.
She wants me to prove to her tomorrow night when we all go out that I can stay with my eyes on her. That I won’t even look at another girl. Her challenge is accepted.
Gladly accepted.
“I’m going for a drink. Any of you miserable gits need one?” Jen stands.
“I’ll come with.” Lexy follows her and winks at me. Goddamn her!
“Didn’t take you long,” Alec says with a slight hint of bitterness.
“Na, mate. It ain’t what you think.” I twirl the bottle between my fingers.
“Then what is it? Cause both of you have got that just f**ked look about you.”
“Yes, I had sex with her. Several times. Happy?” I raise my eyebrows. “I gave her the chance to stop, and she said no. But it isn’t what you’re thinking. It isn’t just sex... Hell, I don’t know what this is.”
“What what is?”
I sigh, leaning my head back on the sofa. “I told her I wanted her, right? Not just as a quick f**k, but as something more.”
“A girlfriend?” Alec smirks.
“Wipe that damn look off your face.” I flick my head back up. “Yes. And she said no. Fucking no!”
“Why did she say no?”
Even Alec is confused. Bloody women.
“She said something about not being sure if she can trust me and wanting to get to know me. I want her. What more is there to know?”
Alec chuckles and shakes his head. “Oh, man. Girls like to know the soppy shit. Ya know, favourite films, favourite food, can you make them smile?”
“Jesus Christ,” I groan, rubbing my forehead. “I’m guessing a list won’t do the job?”
“Oh no,” Alec laughs. “I hope you’re ready for weeks of flowers, early morning text messages, and candlelit dinners. Also, don’t forget the TV cuddle nights. No sex.”
“You’re kidding. How am I supposed to hug that girl without wanting to rip off her clothes?”