She waved away my concern. “We’ll be in public, right? Surely they won’t attack with witnesses. Besides, I’m not exactly defenseless. If the mage who attacked you tries again, I can help you.”
“What if someone recognizes you? I have to imagine it’s not exactly proper for someone in your position to be seen in a bar.”
She raised that stubborn chin we’d inherited from our father. “I can use a glamour spell.”
Dammit. With each argument I gave, Maisie appeared more determined to go. “I don’t know, Maze.”
“Oh, come on. It’ll be fun. A girls’ night out. I haven’t had one of those in… well, never, actually. Please?”
I sighed. Even though I was worried, Maisie was old enough to make her own decisions. Plus, I kind of looked forward to the opportunity to hang out with Maisie away from mage central.
“I probably should be responsible and say no.” I blew out a breath. “But what the hell?”
She smiled broadly, and her movements had a perkiness I hadn’t seen in days. “I’m so excited.”
I laughed, despite my misgivings. “We’ll head out after my training session with Rhea tomorrow, okay?”
“Thanks, Sabina.” She hugged me, and for once the move didn’t make me squirm. “Okay, I need to get some sleep since it looks like tomorrow’s going to be a late night. Sweet dreams, sister.”
After she left, I picked up the book I’d been trying to read when she arrived but found it hard to focus. My conversation with Maisie had given my mind plenty to chew on. I kept telling myself I wasn’t hungry enough to bite, but my brain had other plans. After I’d scanned the same page ten times without registering any words, I slammed the book shut and rose.
As I paced, the portrait of Tristan caught my eye again. It didn’t take a psychologist to see the parallels between my parents and the situation with Adam and me. I’m sure there was some name for a daughter having an attraction to men like her father. Probably Freud had plenty to say on the issue. But I didn’t care much for the whys. I had to figure out the whats. What did I want? What did Adam want? And what the hell was I going to do about it?
I took a deep breath and looked around, reassuring myself I was alone. I didn’t want an audience when I admitted this to myself. I liked Adam. A lot. More than liked. Lusted after? Longed for? Lots of L words. Except for the big L. I doubted I was capable of that word. Still, where the mage was concerned, my feelings were stronger than I wanted to admit.
And since I was alone, I also admitted to myself that I was nervous about his return. Sure, he’d promised things when he left. But in my experience, males promised lots of things in the heat of the moment. Hell, maybe they even believed them when they said them. But distance and time are harsh on promises.
I looked up at my father’s face again. Even if Adam truly wanted me, there was no guarantee things would work out. It certainly hadn’t for my parents. According to Briallen, they were in love. Real love. They loved each other so much they’d ignored a centuries-old law against interracial mating, despite the risks. They’d loved each other so much they created two new lives together. Such a hopeful and optimistic act. And they were punished for it in spades.
I ran a hand through my hair and blew out a long breath. Stewing about it wouldn’t make a solution magically appear. I wasn’t some virgin who needed to follow a male’s lead in a relationship, so seeing how he acted when he returned didn’t appeal. As far as I could tell, my problem was one of my mind not agreeing with my emotions. I blamed Rhea for the fact I even paid attention to the emotional side. With all her insistence on opening myself to my emotions and instincts, she’d managed to make me an indecisive wreck.
I could just see what Adam had to say when he returned. But that wasn’t my style. Instead of leaving it up to him, I decided to wait and see how I felt when I saw him. After all, absence made the heart grow fonder. So maybe when he wasn’t absent anymore, the attraction would be less intense. Less urgent and confusing.
I hoped.
21
The shot slammed into the dummy’s midsection. A wide circle burned for a moment before the entire straw man burst into flames.
“Good!” Rhea shouted. “What’d you do differently? You almost hit the target that time.”
It helped to imagine myself as a weapon. A heat-seeking missile. A living, breathing instrument of destruction. Of course, I couldn’t tell that to Rhea. To her, I shrugged and said, “I tapped into the universal energy.”
Rhea smiled. “Bullshit.”
I laughed out loud. The glow of accomplishment warmed my center. I’d been working on that maneuver for a couple of days. The two hours I’d already spent on the effort so far that evening left me dripping in sweat. But now, watching the dummy smolder and smoke, a surge of energy shot through me. “Does it really matter how I did it?”
Rhea cocked her head. “Guess not, as long as you can do it again.”
I shook my arms and wiggled my fingers. “I’m ready if you are.”
“Damara?” Rhea called, looking around the room for her assistant.
Damara sat cross-legged in the corner with white cords extending from her ears. A magazine lay open in her lap, and she didn’t look up at Rhea’s call.
“Damara!” Rhea shouted, waving her hands to get the girl’s attention.
She looked up at Rhea with her eyebrows raised and a scowl on her face. The faint sounds of a guitar riff bled into the room as she removed the earbuds. “What?”
“Please retrieve another dummy from the storeroom.”
Damara sighed and replaced the earbuds. I frowned, wondering what Rhea would do now that it appeared the girl was flat-out ignoring her. I glanced at Rhea, but she looked unconcerned. Suddenly, a tingle of energy crept up my spine. A second later, a straw dummy flew out of the storeroom and floated across the floor like a ghost. Damara kept the dummy afloat even as she continued to read her magazine. I blinked, surprised to see how easily she’d wielded magic. Just then, she looked up and smirked at me. Her expression said something along the lines of, “See how easy this is for me?”
I raised my eyebrows and pursed my lips, showing her I wasn’t impressed—even though I was.
The dummy finally reached the opposite wall, and the ropes hanging from the ceiling tied themselves around its neck.
Damara rose then and brushed her hands together. I rolled my eyes, realizing she’d been showing off. Whatever. She might be able to move things easily, but I was well on my way to being able to destroy them without lifting a finger.