She considers what I said then she sets the rag down, props her elbow on the counter, and rests her chin on her hand, staring me down. “I’ll tell you what. I’ll let you cash in your four brownie points and go on a date with you if you explain to me what compelled you to write that note on my cupboard that night.” She seems so certain I’m not going to.
I scratch at my chin with uneasiness. Explaining why I did it is nearly impossible—even I’m still trying to figure the reason out. “I don’t know… I just wanted to make sure you were okay after I left.”
“That was the only reason?” Her brow arches in the sexiest way and I wonder if maybe I’ve met my match. Most of the girls I flirt with totally absorb it and flirt back in an obvious way. Granted they’re in a different, lower league than Avery. She does it so naturally that I barely notice before I get caught up in it.
Lost.
I am lost.
And in a different way than I’m used to.
“Or maybe I just wanted to make sure you didn’t forget me.” I lift my shoulder and shrug. “But the first part’s true, too. I just wanted to… I don’t know, comfort you, I guess.” I wince at my word choice, wondering if my drug-deprived mind has finally broken.
She bites down on her lip and I’m the one who’s now starting to squirm. “Comfort me? That’s… sweet.” She smirks, but she’s nervous. “And cute.”
“I’m not as sweet as you think I am. I just have my moments, but they’re few and far between, so don’t get too excited.”
“Nah, I don’t believe that. I barely know you, yet I’ve seen quite a few of those moments.”
“Then I guess it’s just you that brings it out in me.”
“I guess so.”
We’re both stupidly grinning at each other in the kind of way Nova and Quinton do—in the kind of way that drives me crazy in both a good and complicated way.
“And now you owe me a date,” I say, watching the smile vanish from her gorgeous lips, causing me to crash back to reality.
Horrified, she lifts her head from her hand and her body straightens. “I can’t do that. Sorry.”
“But you said you would if I told you why I wrote the note.”
Why am I pushing this so hard? I sound so whiney.
Her chest rises and falls as she struggles to breathe regularly. “Yeah, but how do I know you told the truth?”
“I’m not a liar.” Except to myself.
“Okay, but I still can’t.”
“Because of the no guys’ thing?”
She gulps and then nods. “I’m sorry. I thought you wouldn’t really tell me why you did it. That you’d feed me some cheesy reason or something.”
For the briefest, unsteady moment, Avery appears as tense as I feel, like our emotions match each other and I have to wonder…
What is this girl hiding?
What could have possibly happened to her to make her want to stay away from guys this much? It has to have something to do with her ex-husband. I know it does.
“You know what you two should do.” The bleach-blonde I saw with Avery when I first entered the bar appears out of nowhere. Or maybe she’s been there the entire time and I’m just noticing her now. “You should take your smoke break and have Mr. Hottie Blondie go out back with you,” she says to Avery with a very unsubtle wink.
Avery shoots her the darkest scowl ever. “Tristan, this is Charissa and you’ll have to excuse her because her mouth doesn’t have a filter.”
Charissa seems more like the type of women I’m used to hooking up with, blunt and forward and always trying too hard to be sexy and coming after me because I’m easy. But she doesn’t seem interested in me, just interested in getting Avery to go out back with me.
“It’s nice to meet you, Charissa,” I say politely then focus back on Avery. “I actually would love a smoke right now so…”
“So what?” Avery asks lightly, her nervousness still hidden under the surface.
“You’re going to make me say it, aren’t you?” I’m completely and utterly baffled by this girl. I find myself wanting to know everything about her, ask her all those questions I’ve been wondering about for months.
Avery nods, playful but edgy as she leans the slightest bit closer. “Oh yeah. I’m going to make you work for whatever you want.”
Charissa covers her eyes like she’s embarrassed for Avery. Me, I fucking love it.
I reduce the space between us even more as I slant across the counter toward her. “Avery, would you like to go out back and have a smoke with me? It can be a replacement for the date you promised me but aren’t going to give me.” I feel like I’m back in high school or something, nervously asking a girl out on a date. Only I never dated in high school, just got high and had sex.
“I’m not sure,” Avery replies, thrumming her fingers against her lip. “I’d have to ask my boss first.”
“Whatever,” Charissa says then pokes Avery in the side. “Benny loves you. Now go enjoy ten minutes of your fucking life.” She leans in and lowers her voice, but not enough that I can’t hear her. “You deserve to after Conner showing up here today.”
Avery stiffens at the mention of Conner and my heart misses a beat.
He was here?
Today?
Before I can say anything, Avery reaches under the counter and grabs a pack of cigarettes. “Come on, Pretty Boy, before I change my mind.”
It takes me a moment to get up and follow her. When I do rise to my feet, I almost head back in the direction of Nova and Quinton. But like that night three months ago when Conner pulled Avery out back, I end up turning the other way at the last second and following her outside.
Chapter 11
Wake up.
Avery
I’m blaming it on the fact that I haven’t had sex in two years. It’s got to be my deprived vagina that caused me to flirt and go out back with Tristan to “smoke,” Charissa’s code word for go get some. She probably thinks I’m back here in a heavy lip lock with Tristan. But nope, the only thing fastened to my lips is a filter. And the stars shining luminously in the sky are my reminder that that’s how things should stay.
Of what it took to get here.
Of how easily it could be taken away.
Because Conner was here today.
Looking for me.
And the past and my sins came crashing back to me.