Something in me twitched as he spoke. It was in the way he had said Anna’s name and the way his eyes had glazed over that made me think that he had some sort of feeling for her. More than just concern that she know that Eddie hadn’t dissed her because he hadn’t thought she was cute enough.
“She’s really pretty, you know. I mean, I guess I can see how she can feel like second best, being friends with you; she’s one of those girls you have to really get to know to fully appreciate her. But she’s beautiful. I wish she knew it.” He laughed, nervously. “I’m sorry for talking about her still. I just wish she knew how beautiful she really is.”
“Bryce, I’m going to ask you something.” I looked at him, seriously. “I want you to answer honestly, okay?”
“Okay.” He swallowed hard and I could tell he was nervous.
“Do you like Anna?”
“What?” He looked at me with a shocked expression and I held a hand up.
“I just want the truth, please. It’s okay.” I held my breath as I waited for his answer. This could be the answer to all my prayers I thought. This could be the key to us both letting go.
“I don’t know how it happened, Lexi.” He looked away. “I just feel like we have a special connection. Maybe it’s because both of our mom’s are dead.”
I tried to hide the smile that was spreading across my face. “So you like Anna, right?”
“I’ll still marry you, Lexi. I want to be the guy you believed in for all those years.”
“I don’t love you, Bryce,” I spat out before I could stop myself. “I’m sorry and I don’t want to hurt you, but I don’t love you, not like that. I thought I did. For soo many years, I thought you were the perfect guy and my savior, but it was a dream. There are no perfect guys and there are no saviors. And that’s okay. I’m okay with that.”
“You don’t love me?” He looked at me with a hurt expression and I was still worried that I had made a huge mistake and misread the situation, but then he started laughing. He was laughing so hard that he started coughing and I looked at him in concern, worried I had pushed him to the breaking point.
“I’m sorry, Bryce.” I peered down at him and he grabbed me and pulled me towards him.
“Oh Lexi Lord, do you know how much I love you right now?” He kissed my cheeks and hugged me hard. “Thank you.” And then he started crying. I could feel his tears running from my hair down my face and dropping on my arms. They were warm and cooling, all at the same time and I just held him as he cried. We lay there for about ten minutes and then Bryce pulled away from me.
“As you can see, I’m a bit of a mess still.”
“Aren’t we all?”
“So you don’t love me, huh?” He grinned at me and I shook my head.
“No. I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be.” He rolled his eyes. “It actually makes me feel better.”
“Because you love Anna?”
He shook his head. “No, no I don’t know if I love Anna.” He laughed. “It makes me feel more comfortable to be myself and make mistakes.”
“Huh?”
“I felt like you saw me as your Prince Charming. And I’m not. I’m barely an average guy who’s trying to work out his demons. I was worried that you would always be disappointed in the real me.”
“Oh Bryce,” I sigh. “I never wanted you to feel that kind of pressure from me.”
“It’s okay.” He shook his head and laughed. “And I can’t believe I’m going to say this, but I think you should give Luke a chance.”
“What?”
“He loves you, Lexi. I don’t know if you see it, but he really loves you.” I felt my face go red as he spoke and I closed my eyes.
“I have to tell you something.” My voice was uncertain. “Please don’t hate me.”
“What is it, Lexi?” He looked at me, worried.
“I kinda love Luke and we kinda, you know.”
His eyes popped open and his mouth dropped. “You didn’t?”
I nodded, embarrassed and worried. I didn’t want him to be angry with me. I knew that I should have waited to have a conversation with Bryce before I let myself go into Luke’s arms.
“Wow.” He laughed and shook his head. “No wonder Luke was acting so cagey.”
“Bryce, I want to ask you something. And I need you to tell me the truth.”
“Of course, Lexi.”
“Why were you and Luke at the hospital together the other day?”
“You know about that?” His eyes looked worried and he sat up. “You haven’t told anyone about that have you?”
“No.” I sigh, anxiously. “I only know because I overheard a conversation Luke had with someone.”
“He didn’t tell you?”
“No. Why do you think I’m asking you?”
“I told him not to say anything.” He sighed. “I can’t afford for it to get out.”
“For what to get out, Bryce?”
“I suppose you have a right to know.”
“To know what?” I was losing patience.
“Do you remember that little girl we met in the hospital the other day. Shelby?”
I shook my head in confusion. “No, what little girl?”
The girl in the room when you fainted. You know, when you saw Luke. I wracked my brain and tried to remember a little girl and a vague memory popped up. “I think so. Why?”
“Well, I’m not sure how to say this.”
“Is she your kid Bryce?”
“No.” He laughed. “No.”
“Oh my God, she’s Luke’s kid isn’t she? He lied to me? He told me he never had sex. I wondered how he was so good.” Oops. I blushed at my words. “That’s why he hasn’t told me? He’s scared of what I’ll do if I find out he has a kid?”
“That’s quite a story, Lexi but no, that’s not it either.” Bryce laughed and I sighed with relief. “Shelby’s our sister, Lexi.”
“What?” I stared at him, flabbergasted. “What did you just say?”
“The kid your mom gave up. That’s Shelby. She had cancer. My mom was going to adopt her and now I’m trying to.”
“Wait, what?” I tried to grasp everything he was saying. “You found our sister?”