“Are they monitoring you right now?” he asked.
“I never know. With only a glance, they can see where I am but they can’t really tell what I’m doing.”
“That isn’t right. What about—”
“Jaxon, stop. Just stop, okay? You can’t save me. Besides, that’s not why I told you. You’re just the first man I’ve…I’ve…I don’t know. You affect me. I don’t know why. I’d love for it to stop. Shit, I could barely do my job tonight.” She uttered another of those rough chuckles. “Before you got there, you were all I could think about. And when you got there, all I could think about was getting you the hell out so you’d be safe. But you know what? While I desperately want the madness to end, at the same time I think I would be devastated if it did. What the hell is wrong with me?”
What she said devastated him. But before he could respond, her cell phone began vibrating on the nightstand.
Both of them stiffened. She raised up, stared down at him. Her eyes glassed over, and he knew.
“My boss,” she said, paling again.
Her tormentor.
CHAPTER 11
Le’Ace withdrew from the warmth and firmness of Jaxon’s body. Hardest thing ever. She stood, swiped up her cell from the nightstand, and stalked to the bathroom, kicking the door closed behind her. All without a word.
Jaxon made no move to stop her. A good thing, too. Vulnerable and raw as she currently felt, she might have clawed him a new eye socket. Now he knew her deepest shame. And yet, his treatment of her hadn’t changed.
Wait. That wasn’t true. His treatment had changed. From anger to gentleness, almost…tender.
How could she preserve any distance with him now?
She’d always wondered how humans fell in love, how they remained emotionally close to each other in this world of chaos and despair, and now she knew. They shared their pasts and showed each other their internal scars, basking in the misguided belief that they’d protect each other from future pain.
No one can protect me. Not really. Here was proof. She braced her free hand against the cold tile wall and held the phone to her ear with the other. Dread, terror, and resolve beat strong fists inside her chest.
“Yes,” she said. Neutral tone. Good. She’d play this like she played everything else with Estap. Calm, cool, uncaring. She’d been trained well. Only time her training tanked was when Jaxon was involved.
“You failed,” Estap told her.
“How so?” I hate you. “I got you closer to answers than anyone else, even though the alien knew who I was the moment he stepped into the bar. He’d been waiting for me, asked for my help.”
A crackling pause, laden with tension. “I was told the injured A.I.R. agent showed up. Did I or did I not tell you to keep him hidden?”
“You told me to see to his care and learn his secrets.”
“Semantics. Why did you allow him to leave the compound?”
“I underestimated him.” Truth. “Trust me, that will not happen again.”
A few seconds—an eternity—passed in quiet, the only sound Estap’s even breaths. He did this on purpose, she knew. He wanted her nervous, squirming. Bastard. Satisfaction was not something she’d give him.
“I think you’re attracted to him,” Estap finally said.
Her heart skipped a beat. “Please. He’s ugly.” Even uttering the lie was abhorrent to her.
“You know my thoughts on this matter, Le’Ace. Attraction equals distraction.”
She didn’t mention that Estap was married, that he often “conferenced” with his secretary, and that every one of his business trips included “decompression” time in his hotel room with an escort. He’d simply point out that he was human, she was not.
She also didn’t mention that she’d followed him a few times, taken holophotos, and anonymously mailed them to his wife. Not that it had done any good. The wife hadn’t left him.
“Nothing to say, Le’Ace?”
“I told you. I’m not attracted to him.” She couldn’t bring herself to call him ugly again.
“I was told he scared the Schön away,” Estap said, his chastisement clear.
“You were told wrong. He didn’t scare the otherworlder away. I did.”
Estap sputtered, having clearly been in the middle of a drink. He coughed, clearing his throat. “You? Why?”
“To prevent a public brawl. Sir.”
“My agents could have prevented a brawl,” he said tightly. “You had other things to do.” An irritated sigh followed the words. “Did you learn anything during your brief conversation?”
As if he didn’t already know. One of his agents had to have been recording the entire exchange. “He calls himself Nolan, and he’s intrigued by love. He claims he doesn’t like what his brethren are doing, and he’ll contact me soon with a way to stop them.”
“I doubt he’ll return to the bar.”
“No. He won’t.” She was positive about that. Nolan wasn’t stupid. He had to know that conversation would not be next on the agenda. Capture would. Estap’s men were probably working on a way to neutralize the dematerializing process even now, locking the otherworlder in place. “Was Nolan spotted outside the bar after he disappeared?”
“No. He vanished from our scanners completely, as if he’d dissolved into another dimension rather than a wall.”
Another dimension? “Is that a realistic possibility?” Hell, anything was possible in this new world, she supposed.
“We’re looking into it.”
Which broke down to, You do not have clearance for that type of information. She rolled her eyes. “My next move?”
“I’m going to think, confer with my colleagues, and will have new orders for you in the morning.”
What, no punishment? No further chastisement? She dared not hope.
“Have you learned anything else from the agent?” Estap asked.
No, she dared not hope. Her shoulders sagged. “Only that the toxin is passed from Schön to human through bodily fluids.”
“As we suspected. We found something in Nolan’s saliva. The glass that was brought into the lab, well, the other-worlder’s spit was so acidic it had already eaten through the rim. Opened the door to a thousand more questions. Like why the saliva hadn’t burned the victims.” A crackling pause. “You’ve tried everything in your power to persuade Jaxon to talk?”