Owen winced. “I am? I’m not trying to. I just really don’t want this to mess up things with Caitlyn. I should have gone after her last night, not let her walk away. I was just completely stunned that she took it so hard.”
“Didn’t her husband have an affair with a younger woman?”
Owen nodded. “Yeah, so? What does that have to do with anything?”
“Lindsey is younger. And hot. And very pregnant. Maybe Caitlyn felt threatened.”
“She shouldn’t. I haven’t been able to think of anything but her all day. And I can’t seem to stop texting her and calling her. She’s going to think I’m a desperate loser.”
“Because you are.”
Owen’s response was to slug Kellen in the arm.
“So how are you going to be with Caitlyn when Lindsey’s around?” Kellen asked.
“I can be just friends with Lindsey.”
“You can be just friends with a hot woman who wants you?”
“Yeah.”
“Owen, if you really want to be with Caitlyn, you need to stay away from Lindsey as much as possible. She’s vulnerable and interested and you’re easy.”
“I’m not easy.”
Kellen lifted an eyebrow at him.
“Okay, I’m totally easy. But I don’t have to be.”
“So what are you going to do with Lindsey?”
“We’ll get her a place to stay. Help her with medical bills and stuff. It’s not like we can’t afford it.”
“Are we sure she’s not just making up this whole thing so she can have a free place to stay?”
“You sound like Adam.”
“He does have a lot of experience with mooches. His father, for instance.”
“So what do you think we should do with her? We can’t just toss her out in the street. And there is no way she’s going on tour with us.”
Kellen sighed. There really was no easy solution to the problem. “We can set her up in a place in her hometown.”
“I mentioned that to her last night—tried to convince her that she’d be better off around her family and friends back home—and she cried for over an hour. Apparently her family has disowned her.”
“Oh.”
“I thought maybe my mom could keep an eye on her while we’re on tour. You know what Mom’s like. She loves these little charity cases.”
Kellen knew exactly what Owen’s mom was like. He’d been one of her charity cases, after all.
“Besides,” Owen continued, “Mom’s been bugging Chad for grandchildren ever since he proposed to Josie. Maybe this will get her off his case.”
“Because she already has a grandchild on the way?”
“It’s not mine. You were there. Was I wearing a condom?”
“Yeah.”
“End of story.”
Not necessarily, but Kellen figured it wouldn’t do any good to argue about the baby’s possible parentage. They’d just have to wait until this thing played out.
“So I guess you have this all figured out. You didn’t need to talk to me about it after all.”
“I always need to talk to you, Kelly. Seems I wasn’t the only one who had an adventurous time last night. How’d you do at the house?”
Kellen shook his head. “I never went inside. I was out on the beach, trying to throw away that damned cuff you gave me, when I heard a piano melody that lifted me out of the depression that’s been holding me under for five years.”
“A song? Is that how you met Dawn? I wondered how you hooked up with her.”
“She’s renting the house next to mine while she works; she says the sea inspires her compositions. I knocked on her door so I could hear the song she was working on.”
“And then you got busy with her.” Owen slugged him in the thigh. “You stud.”
“It was more than that. We talked and she shared her music with me and then…” Kellen winked at Owen. “Then I got busy with her.”
“When are you going to see her again?” Owen asked.
“Never.” It made his heart hurt to say it, but it had to be that way. There wasn’t a woman alive who deserved to make do with what was left of his heart. And someone like Dawn deserved a man who could give her the moon and stars. Devote every piece of himself to her happiness. He just didn’t have that much to give her. He’d already given it all to Sara.
“You’re an idiot,” Owen said.
“And you’re the relationship master?”
“I don’t deny that I suck at relationships,” Owen said, “but at least I’m trying.”
The limo pulled to a stop outside of the hotel. Kellen tossed his half-eaten sandwich into the seat and climbed out. He had tried. He’d opened himself up to Dawn faster than he’d let his guard down with anyone. Even Sara. Even Owen. But it just wouldn’t work. And if he fell in love with another woman and she left him—on purpose or through no fault of her own—then Kellen didn’t think he’d survive. How much of a heart did a man require to maintain a pulse? He was sure it was more than he had left to spare.
Chapter Twelve
Kellen pretended to watch I Love Lucy reruns while he hid in a hotel room with most of his band. Adam was sketching realistic-looking boobs as he used the hotel phone to schedule some debauchery with his woman in New Orleans. Gabe was tinkering with the mechanisms of some crazy invention that had Kellen cocking his head in confusion—what in the hell was that thing? Owen fiddled with his cellphone the entire evening to prove once and for all that he was a desperate loser. Jacob had never made it to the hotel. Kellen could only guess what he and Lindsey were up to back on the bus. Probably picking out baby names.
By the time they were sitting in the limo and headed back to the stadium, Kellen was ready to climb out of his skin. Why had he told Owen to dispose of Sara’s cuff? He had been fine without it when Dawn had been available to distract him, but now that he was alone with his thoughts, he found himself back in his ugly place. His very dark and oppressing ugly place. Should he call Dawn? He didn’t have her number. Should he drive back to Galveston after their show in New Orleans? No, he was sure she never wanted to see him again. And in his note to her, he’d made it clear that he wasn’t interested.
Except he was interested.
And he hated himself for the weakness.
“I’m going to punch you if you don’t get out of your funk,” Owen said. “I thought all your doom and gloom was caused by your lack of sex, but you got laid last night, so what gives?”