Roman let himself into the Gazette offices, using his key. The place was still quiet. It was too early for Lucy’s arrival, and from the look of things, even Chase hadn’t made it downstairs yet. Roman needed fresh-brewed coffee and fresher air than the stuffy office provided, so he left the door to the street open, then headed for the kitchen to make something strong and caffeinated to drink.
Daybreak had forced him out of Charlotte’s bed. He’d left her asleep. Only a kiss on her cheek and then he was gone. The town was talking enough about Charlotte and her family. He didn’t need to add to the gossip by walking out of her apartment in broad daylight. Leaving in the early morning was chancy, but he hadn’t been able to resist the opportunity to spend the night in her bed, her warm, naked body snuggled tight against his. As it would be for the rest of his life.
A tremor shook him hard. He might have acknowledged difficult truths—that he wanted to stop running, wanted to settle down, and that he did love Charlotte—but he’d be a liar if he said he wasn’t scared shitless. Not enough to change his mind. Just enough to make him human, Roman thought. He was on the verge of a major life change and it had him on edge.
He still couldn’t believe the words had came out of his mouth. Not that the words had been difficult. For a writer, they never were. But Roman always thought things through first, then spoke with precision. He’d never before let emotion overrule common sense. But his feelings for Charlotte were over ten years in the making. He wanted to marry her and he did love her. He hadn’t planned on either declaration, but spontaneity was good. It kept a relationship fresh, Roman thought wryly.
But his hand shook as he worked on the coffee, counting scoops and filling the machine with water. His timing could have been better. He’d proposed in public, when she was coming off an emotional confrontation with her father, and before he’d had the chance to make decisions crucial to their future. Given all that, he had to admit she’d taken his words better than he could have imagined.
But now that he was alone in the office he’d spent so much time in as a kid, he realized his escape from Charlotte’s bed was a good thing. He needed time alone, to figure out how to balance his life now, and he had no idea what came next. Though he figured contacting the Washington Post about that job offer would be a good start. The notion of picking up the phone didn’t instill in him the urge to run. He decided that was a good sign.
“Hey, little brother. You’re up early.” Chase walked into the main room of the offices. “What are you doing here? Mom run out of Cocoa Puffs?”
Roman shrugged. “I wouldn’t know.” Because he hadn’t been home long enough to eat breakfast. He glanced at his oldest sibling. “You know, I just realized we’ve done nothing but talk about me since I hit town. What’s going on with you these days?”
Chase shrugged. “Same old thing.”
“Any new women?” Roman hadn’t seen Chase with anyone in particular since he’d been home.
Chase shook his head.
“So what do you do for company? What takes care of the loneliness?” Roman asked. And he wasn’t talking about just sex. The brothers never divulged that kind of information. Chase knew what Roman meant. They both experienced that damn loneliness that came from their choices. The kind Charlotte had taken care of for him.
With a shrug, Chase said, “If I need company, I have some friends in Harrington. You know Yorkshire Falls is too damn small to get involved without anyone knowing. But I’m not lacking for company. Now back to you.”
Roman laughed. Chase never could sustain a conversation about himself for too long. “What would you say if I told you the Washington Post offered me an editorial job?” he asked his oldest brother.
Chase padded across the room in socks, no shoes—one of the benefits of living upstairs—and joined Roman in the small kitchen area, where he poured himself a cup of coffee. He raised the mug. “Thanks, by the way.”
Roman leaned against the refrigerator. “No sweat.”
“I’d say don’t take a desk job because of the coin toss.”
He ran a hand through his hair. “I can’t pretend it didn’t happen.” The irony was, Roman was now grateful he’d lost the coin toss, glad he was forced to stick around Yorkshire Falls, glad he’d been forced to consider marriage. Because the circumstances had conspired to give him a second chance with Charlotte, the woman he loved.
The woman he’d always loved.
“That coin toss is the reason my entire life is about to change.” He shook his head. That hadn’t come out right. Actually, the coin toss had provided the impetus to begin a new life. But love was the reason he was marrying Charlotte. Not family obligation.
“Marriage is a huge step. So’s a baby. I know how bad Mom wants grandkids, but you have to admit, since Eric, she’s calmed down a little.”
“That’s because he’s keeping her too busy to bother us, but trust the one who sees her most mornings—she hasn’t forgotten she wants grandchildren and she’s still swigging Maalox.” Though sometimes Roman thought she seemed more active when she thought he wasn’t around, he figured he was imagining things. “So if you ask me, nothing’s changed as far as that goes.” But Roman’s feelings about his mother’s needs had changed.
“I still say make sure you can live with any decision you make.” Chase paused for a gulp of coffee. “Rick and I will understand if you don’t want to be the sacrificial lamb in Mom’s quest for grandchildren just because you lost the coin toss. You can still back out of the deal.”
Chase’s words were ones Roman had used himself a short time ago. But things had changed from the time Roman had returned, exhausted, from London.
Until recently, he hadn’t taken the time to examine the hows and whys of his actions during his short time home. Jet-lagged and exhausted, he’d just known the family had a need and it was his turn to fill it. Charlotte’s presence in town had changed things. And he wondered how to explain his change of heart to Chase, the brother who prized his solitude and bachelor status most.
Charlotte walked up the path to the Gazette, only to find the door wide open. She knocked lightly, but no one answered. Since the Gazette had always been a relaxed place, one where you could stop by, hang out, talk to Lucy, Ty Turner, or even Chase, depending on his mood and schedule, she let herself inside. Expecting to see Lucy on the phone at her desk, Charlotte was surprised to see the large room was empty.