Kyle shrugs, wandering into the front room and looking around. He doesn’t say anything for a moment, his eyes flitting from picture to picture. Me. Cam. Cam and Kyle. Cam and I. All three of us. “I wanted to talk to you.”
“I don’t want to hear it.” I storm into the kitchen.
“That’s nice. You don’t even know what I want to talk about.”
“Probably the same old bullshit everyone else does.”
“Or maybe it’s not anything to do with you. It might surprise you to learn not everything is about you, Roxanne Hughes. As much as you apparently think otherwise,” he finishes dryly.
My mouth drops open, and I turn to him. He leans against the doorframe connecting the kitchen and the front room, his hands in his pockets and his hair sweeping casually over his forehead.
“Wow, I don’t remember you being this much of a dickhead when you left here last summer,” I snap, disguising the sting of his words.
“And I don’t remember you being this much of a bitch, so I guess we’re on a level playing field here.”
I c**k my thumb in the direction of the door. “You know the way out.”
Kyle doesn’t move. His head tilts to the side and his eyes study me. “You’re cute.”
“Excuse me?”
“I said you’re cute.”
“I heard what you said.” I snap my jaw up. “By “excuse me,” I meant what the f**k?”
“I know.” The bastard grins. He f**king grins.
“Something funny?”
“You really, really don’t want me to answer that.”
I stare at him stonily, trying to ignore the flipping of my stomach. The way he smiles… I’ve seen him do it thousands of times and it never gets old. It’s playful and endearing and annoying at the same time.
“I wish I could wipe that smile off your face,” I lie.
“Really? Because I wish someone would put one on yours.”
“There’d be more of a chance if you didn’t come over here and talk to me like shit.”
Kyle laughs. “Right. I guess you’ve already forgotten who started with the sass?”
I open my mouth and pause. Oh yeah. That was me…
“Exactly.” He pushes off from the doorframe and crosses the kitchen, his stride swallowing it up. I keep my eyes on him as he moves closer to me and leans his hip against the counter. “You know, just because I want to talk to you doesn’t mean it’s about you.”
“That’s the only reason most people do these days.”
“And whose fault is that?” One of his eyebrows goes up. “I got home four days ago and even I can see you need a damn good talking to.”
“Hey-”
“But that’s not what I’m talking about.”
I narrow my eyes, putting my hands in the front pocket of Cam’s hoodie. “What, then?”
“Cam.”
I shake my head.
“Yes.”
“No.” I move away from him. “I can’t-”
“You might not need me, but maybe I need you for this.”
His words stop me in my tracks. “Why? You could talk to Si, or Ben, or even Lewis. Why me?”
“Because.” He pauses and exhales a loud, pained breath. “Because no one knew Cam the way we did, Rox. No one could possibly imagine how much it f**king hurts to be here without him. Except you.”
I squeeze my eyes shut and open the front door. “I’m sorry,” I whisper. “I can’t help you.”
“Jesus, Roxy.” Kyle’s feet thud against the laminate floor, and the air shifts when he stops in front of me. He takes a lock of my hair between his fingers, twirling it. “You take stubborn to a whole new level. I need to talk about him, okay? I need to remember him with someone who loved him even more than I did. Without him here… I feel lost. Completely f**king lost.”
I open my eyes. His face is right in front of mine, his eyes on mine, and I swallow. My heart picks up pace from both his closeness and the raw pain in his voice I feel right through me.
“I’m not ready to talk about him.”
“It’s been six months.”
“And?” I knock his hand from my hair. “I know. But that doesn’t mean I want to talk about him, Kyle. You have to understand that.”
He smiles sadly. “And that’s your problem.”
“I don’t have a problem.”
“Oh, you have several.” His laugh is as hopeless as his smile is sad. “You’re just too busy hiding behind all the shit you do to yourself to realize it.”
“You said you didn’t want to talk about that.”
“I said I didn’t want to. Not that I wouldn’t.”
“Asshole.”
“So you keep saying.” He backs away from the house, dangling his keys from his hand. “I won’t give up on it, Roxy.”
“On what?” I frown.
“On getting you to talk about him. You need it as much as I do, difference is I can admit it.”
“Kyle…”
“Iz comes back in a few days. She wanted me to tell you.” He gets into his car with the mention of his sister, salutes me, and reverses. I stare after him as he drives down the street. My cell feels heavy in my pocket, and I pull it out. My thumb swipes across the screen to Layla’s number and hovers over the call button.
A fat tear rolls down my cheek, and I tap it. That conversation pushed me over the edge and tore open my already gaping wound. My body stings with the reality of it – I’m not the same person I was before and neither is Kyle. We’ve both grown up and been changed by the loss of the person that held us anywhere near each other.
I redial Layla’s number and accept the truth.
The day I lost Cam, I lost Kyle too.
Chapter Four – Kyle
“What are you doing here?” Roxy asks as I walk through the door of the café.
“Your customer service could use some work,” I reply, sitting on a stool at the counter.
“I’m sorry.” She smiles sweetly. “Can I get you anything?”
“Coffee.”
“In a mug or over your head?”
“Over yours, if possible.”
She purses her lips and turns to the machine. Her ponytail swishes over shoulder, exposing the curve of her neck. I narrow my eyes at her.
“You should probably take your hair down.” My jaw snaps shut.