And now he was never coming back.
Overwhelming sorrow expanded inside me, like a balloon being filled with too much air. The thought of never seeing him again, of never being able to talk strategy or watch movies together, left a gnawing kind of pain in the center of my chest.
I wondered if the sorrow would ever go away. I wondered if he could forgive me for how I spent my first night without him.
Even though he was gone, there was still something I could do for him. There was still a way I could at least attempt to make up for what I did.
I could bring down his killers. I could see their murdering asses in jail. Maybe I would arrange for them to have a cellmate named Tiny Tim, only he wouldn’t be that tiny.
“If it’s here, I’ll find it.” I vowed.
Tucker held the mug out to me as I passed by him. I glanced between him and my mug. The mug he practically just made out with.
Okay, so he didn’t make out with it.
But his lips touched it. Same difference.
“Keep it,” I said. “I’ll get another.”
His knowing chuckle followed me all the way out into the living room. I ignored him. I had a flash drive to find.
23
Tucker
We searched the entire place. Charlie looked in places I never even thought of. She knew all the little nooks and crannies in this place, and every single one of them was empty.
Not finding it was a letdown.
Going through all my brother’s belongings was worse.
I missed him, and the fact we drifted apart during recent years was something I would never forgive myself for. The distance between us was my fault, a fact I never wanted to admit to myself until now.
It was obvious that Charlie cared for him. I could see the lines of pain etched in her pretty features. I watched the set of her shoulders slump every time she came across something that meant a lot to Max.
I was an ass. A world-class jerk.
I took advantage of her sorrow last night. I took advantage of her fear from being attacked. She was a willing participant, but I was the one who initiated it all.
“It isn’t here,” Charlotte said, bringing me out of deep thought.
“I already searched his office and his locker at the gym. He didn’t have a safety deposit box at the bank. Can you think of anywhere else it could be? Was there anyone Max trusted—really trusted—that he might give it to for safekeeping?”
After a moment’s thought, a light came into her eyes. “There is one place we can try.”
“Great, let’s go.”
“We can’t.”
I swung back around, wondering if she lost her damn mind. “What the hell do you mean we can’t?”
“The place doesn’t open until later.” She glanced at the clock and sighed. “Besides, I’m going to be late for work.”
“You’re going to work?” I asked incredulously.
“I have to. The clients that I managed to get an account with are coming in to sign the papers today. I have to be there.”
“You’re going to put your job ahead of justice for Max?” I growled.
She drew herself up to her full height (which was still shorter than me) and gave me a glare. “How dare you say such a thing to me?”
I crossed my arms over my chest.
“If I call in sick, it will look suspicious. I’ve never called in sick a day in my life. People will wonder what’s going on. Whoever killed Max is probably watching us. The best thing to do is go on like everything is normal.”
“I’m not going into his office and pretending to be him. That place sucks.”
Charlie rolled her eyes and went back to the bedroom. I followed her. “Fine. Stay here and pick up the mess we made searching.”
I raised an eyebrow. Did she just suggest I stay home and clean? Maybe I should bake some cupcakes with pink frosting while I was at it.
With an armload of clothes, she turned to me. “I’ll go in, sit through the meeting, and then tell the partners I’m coming down with something and come home. By then, the restaurant will be open and we’ll go see if Max took the drive there.”
“It’s at a restaurant?”
She nodded. “Max’s best friend owns a restaurant here in the city. It’s a really classy place.”
Classy = no beer.
“I can’t wait,” I said sarcastically.
She grinned and went to the bathroom, shutting herself in. It was too bad because I was hoping for a glance of some skin.
A few minutes later, she came out dressed in a pair of loose black pants and what looked like a dark-green fitted T-shirt tucked into the pants. It accentuated her flat stomach and the way her waist curved in like an hourglass. Her hair was pulled back in that stupid bun.
She rushed to the door, sticking a pair of black high heels on her feet and grabbing a black fitted jacket. Her brief case was sitting by the door where she left it along with her purse.
“Charlie,” I said, stopping her from leaving.
She turned back.
“About last night…” I began, not sure why I wanted to bring it up but unable to let her walk out of here without bringing it up. We hadn’t talked about it at all. True to our agreement, when the sun came up, our focus switched to Max.
Focusing on Max was good. But looking at her now…
She held up her hand, halting my words and my thoughts. “It can’t happen again.”
Her words wounded my manly pride. That had been some stellar sex. I excelled in pleasing her. I knew we had an agreement, but I thought once she got a taste of this she’d want more.
So I did what any man with wounded pride would do. I lied.
“I wasn’t talking about the sex,” I said, clearing my throat. “I just wanted to remind you to be careful out there. Clearly those guys last night were following us. Waiting. Pay attention to your surroundings today. If anything seems out of the ordinary—anything at all—you get to a crowded area and you call me. Okay?”
A pink stain bloomed across her high cheekbones and she shifted uncomfortably. “Oh. Right.”
I didn’t enjoy making her feel like she was the only one that was thinking about the incredible sparks between us. But I didn’t know what else to do. It was easier this way. Less painful.
She left the apartment without a single glance behind her.
I sighed and ran a hand over the top of my head.
I wondered what she would have said if I’d told her the truth. I wondered if the guilt in her eyes would give way to something more.
I wondered if I was the only one that thought one night hadn’t been enough.