I never laid on her either. Usually I got up and went home, or if I was still drunk, I rolled over and went to sleep.
I never said I was the romantic type.
Which I guess is why my behavior seemed odd. Kissing and touching usually made me uncomfortable. I had sex for the release, for the pure pleasure that it gave my body. I didn’t do it because it gave me butterflies in my belly or made my heart go pitter patter.
That shit was for girls.
So why was I lying here thinking about threading her fingers through mine? Why was I already anticipating the next time I could bury myself inside her?
I felt her shift beside me and I turned my head. Charlotte lay on her side, facing me with her fine-boned hand curled up on the pillow beside her. There was just enough light for me to make out her features, the way her hair spread out across the pillow.
For the first time in a very long time I wished I was better at this. I wished I knew something I could say, some pretty words that she would like to hear.
The hand resting between us lifted and her cool fingers stroked the side of my face lightly. Before pulling away, she cupped the side of my jaw and her lips curved upward.
I didn’t have to say anything. No pretty words would compete with what we just did… and how that singular touch made me feel. So I settled for just watching her, for the glimpses I could catch in the dark.
Once again my cock starting stirring. Clearly, it wasn’t done with her. Clearly, one epic sex session was not going to be enough.
Why her? something inside me asked. Why would the one woman that was supposed to be off limits be the one I wanted more of?
The reason didn’t matter because it didn’t change anything.
Charlotte was my brother’s girlfriend. I broke the brother code by sleeping with her tonight. Yeah, maybe I could pass tonight off as too much beer, too much emotion, and being attacked on the street. Or I could chalk it up to being temporarily insane because my twin was gone.
All of those reasons were much better than admitting to myself that I was the world’s biggest ass.
I wondered what Charlie was thinking right about now.
She was looking at me, her breathing even and her face relaxed. She was probably thinking about how great in the sack I was.
The longer we lay there, the farther away we got from the “afterglow” of sex. The air around us began to change, to become more tense, and the satisfied impression I picked up on from her side of the bed began to diminish.
I knew exactly what was going on.
She was starting to have regrets. Reality was crashing in from our spur-of-the-moment sex, and she was looking at me and seeing me… not Max.
The realization stung, and the thought that maybe I wasn’t good enough for her created a bitter taste in my mouth.
“I’m going to take a shower,” she said after a while. She slid over to the vacant side of the bed and stood, dragging the sheet with her, and tucked it around her naked form.
I would be lying if I said I wasn’t disappointed I wasn’t going to get to watch her luscious ass retreating.
Charlotte walked across the bedroom where she stopped in the door. Ahead of her, the light from the other rooms shone, creating a golden halo effect around her, making her look like just a shadow. She rested a hand on the doorframe and looked over her shoulder, her hair cascading down her back.
I couldn’t see her eyes in this kind of light, but I felt them.
And then she turned and walked into the bathroom, quietly shutting the door behind her. The closing of that door signaled our time was over. This was usually my cue to leave. To throw on my clothes, climb in my truck, and drive home.
I threw off the remaining blanket and stood. My pants were lying on the floor at the end of the bed.
I ignored them.
I wasn’t getting dressed.
The shower was already running when I let myself into the bathroom. The white sheet was lying in crumpled heap on the floor and steam was wafting up from behind the curtain, dissipating in the air, creating humidity in the small room.
I felt angry for some reason. Cheated. I didn’t like it and I wasn’t going to accept it.
The shower curtain made a sharp scraping sound when I yanked it across the rod. Charlotte gasped and leapt back beneath the spray. For several long seconds, I was transfixed with the water running freely over her naked skin.
“Tucker! What the hell are you doing?” she said, crossing her arms over her chest like she was embarrassed.
It was amusing. “I already know every inch of that chest intimately. Covering them up is a waste of energy,” I said darkly.
“We shouldn’t have done that,” she said, turning her back on me completely. I got a nice view of her ass.
Anger burned my throat and I swallowed it down.
“Water is getting all over the floor,” she fussed without turning around.
I stepped into the shower and pulled the curtain closed. The water was hot, scalding even. Like she was trying to wash me off her skin. I wouldn’t allow it.
Charlotte spun, shock written across her features.
“You liked it,” I said, a challenge in my tone.
Water poured over her head and dragged her hair down, and small drops of the liquid clung to her golden lashes.
“Tell me you liked it.” I demanded.
“If I tell you, will you get out?”
I regarded her with stony silence. I wasn’t promising one damn thing.
Eventually she sighed wearily. “Yes, I liked it.” Her voice was low like she was whispering a secret.
“I’m not done with you yet.”
Her eyes snapped up to mine and she pushed at the wet strands that had fallen in her eyes. “Yes, you are. We shouldn’t have done that! You’re Max’s brother.” At the mention of my brother, her lower lip wobbled and her shoulders slumped.
I hated to see the sorrow that swam within her. I wanted to kiss it away.
Yeah, it was wrong, but that’s how I felt.
We stood there with water raining down around us, the drops splashing off her skin and landing on mine. It seemed we were at a stalemate.
“One night,” I heard myself say.
“What?” she asked, leaning toward me ever so slightly.
“Give me one night with you. One night for us to get this attraction out of our system. One night without guilt, without telling ourselves how horrible we are.” It made perfect sense. Charlotte was off limits to me, which is exactly why I wanted her so badly.
All we had to do was remove the barriers between us, the temptations. Our thirsts would be quenched and in the morning, neither of us would want the other.