“Nuh uh, you can do better than that.” I grabbed her around the waist to pull her down next to me. Usually this would have her squealing with laugher. Instead, she went stone still and just looked at me.
I kissed her, but she was obviously not into it, so I stopped. I hoped it was just anxiety to get back home, but I wasn’t sure.
Thanks to Becca’s insistence, we got an early start, and we were back in Clayton Falls by midafternoon. I figured it was a good thing. We’d finally be able to spend some time alone. As I turned the corner toward the Mathews’s house, I decided to ask her the question I’d been mulling over all weekend.
“I was thinking that it might be nice if you didn’t have to always run your stuff back and forth.”
“It’s not a big deal.”
“We only have a few more weeks before you leave, and I’d rather not spend nights apart just because you don’t want to worry about having the right stuff with you or anything. Wouldn’t it be better to have everything at my place?”
“It’s just a few weeks…there’s no reason to change things.” She looked away from me.
I pulled up along the curb. “Becca, I want you to. Don’t you want to?”
“I can’t do this.”
“Do what? Move your stuff?”
“This. It’s moving way too fast, which is dumb since I’m leaving.”
“What’s too fast?”
“You asking me to move in, or whatever.”
“I just thought it would be fun. We only have a few weeks seeing each other every day. Let’s make the most of it.”
“Is that all it is?”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” I let the engine idle.
“I’m not what you’re looking for. I don’t just want to be someone’s wife and give up my life.”
“Excuse me?”
“You heard me. Don’t play dumb.”
I could feel my temper flaring, and I snapped. “I don’t recall asking you to be my wife.”
She looked like I’d slapped her.
“Let’s end this while we’re ahead. It wouldn’t have worked out anyway,” she said coldly.
“What the hell?” I slammed my hands on the steering wheel. “What’s going on?”
“I have dreams, Gavin, and just because you don’t want to follow yours, doesn’t mean I shouldn’t follow mine.” She stared down at her hands as she said it, unwilling to even meet my eye.
“Oh, so I’m somehow inferior to you because I’m actually happy with my life?”
“Not inferior, just different. Too different from me. If you’re happy spending your life as a cop in freaking Mayberry, that’s fine with me, but I need to get back to the real world.” She opened her door and got out, but I couldn’t move. I just sat there as she pulled out her bag from the back and slammed the door.
She glanced back at me once before walking up the driveway, but I didn’t leave. I don’t think I moved for twenty minutes. I couldn’t process what had just happened. She’d dumped me on the grounds that I was somehow not good enough for her. I only had one word for her in that moment and it wasn’t one I was proud to say.
I drove home, stopping by Tom’s house to pick up Max.
“Hey, man, how was the weekend?” Tom asked when he opened the door.
“Don’t ask,” I barked, pushing inside past him. “Where is he?”
“Out back. Are you okay?”
“Okay? No, that’s not the right word. I’m going to get my damn dog and go home.”
“What happened?” Kelly walked into the room with Max on her tail.
“Nothing, nothing fucking happened.”
“Hey, don’t talk to Kelly that way.”
“I was just leaving. Thanks for watching him.” I opened the front door knowing Max would follow. I didn’t bother waiting to get his stuff. I had extras of everything at home.
I gunned the engine pulling out of the driveway. I didn’t want to watch Tom and his wife, while I was once again the sorry loser with no one.
Part of me still couldn’t believe we’d just had that fight, and I half expected to see Becca sitting on my front step when I pulled in. My steps were empty. I went inside and poured myself a drink. What the hell had just happened? How had our conversation gone from her moving in to her breaking it off?
Hours later, I calmed down enough to realize that something had to have happened in Augusta, but there was nothing I could do if she wouldn’t talk to me about it. No, this wasn’t my fault. She was the one who’d have to apologize if we were ever getting over it. But I knew the chances of that were doubtful, especially with her leaving so soon. I thought about taking a ride over to Gill’s, but Ronny would probably be there. I couldn’t handle him gloating.
I hadn’t felt so low in a long time—not since Dawn left. I stayed away from northern girls for a reason.
Chapter Thirty-One
Becca
I felt like I’d been kicked in the stomach, even though I was the one who made the decision to end it. I had already decided to let our relationship fade out when I left, but I’d planned to enjoy the last few weeks we had. Then he’d asked me to move in. It scared me. It would just make leaving harder. When I tried to explain it, Gavin reminded me that he hadn’t proposed, and it just confused me more. I didn’t know what terrified me more: Gavin wanting to move things forward or him deciding he was done with me. I don’t know what came over me, but cruel words flew out of my mouth. I pretty much called him a loser. I should have taken it back or tried to apologize, but I couldn’t. The expression on his face let me know it was too late. I just got out of the car and walked away.
I didn’t sleep at all that night and dragged myself into work in the morning.
“Hi, Becca. How was your weekend? You went home with Gavin, didn’t you?” the older Mr. Morgan greeted me.
“It was fine. Thanks for asking.”
“Would it be okay if we had a talk? This is your last full week of work.”
Here it came—the evaluation.
I followed Jim into his office where Matt already sat. He smiled at me as I took a seat in the chair next to him.
“We’ve both been very impressed with your work this summer, Becca. You’ve handled everything professionally and we’re prepared to offer you a position here if it’s something you’re interested in.”