“Fuck.” There went that word again. This time I really meant it.
Chapter Ten
Casey
Seeing my mom again was surreal. Very little time had actually passed since I’d last seen her, but in some ways, my whole life had changed. I wasn’t the same girl I was when we’d last spoken, and now I knew she wasn’t the same woman. She watched me the way you’d watch a spreading fire. She was trying to see which way I’d go, and whether I’d combust. Considering my head had been likely taken over by a witch, I didn’t even know the answer to that.
“Honey?” Mom pulled me out of my thoughts. We’d just said goodbye to Toby and were waiting for the twins to ready the boat. He’d walked away from the dock after the twins insisted on it. I think they thought he was going to make a run for it. What they didn’t realize was if he was going to do that, he’d just fly.
I glanced over my shoulder. Toby was still there watching with a half-smile. He didn’t want me to go any more than I did, but we both knew there was no other option. If I didn’t find someone to help me, there would be no ‘us’ to worry about.
“Yeah, sorry.”
Mom smiled lightly. “It’s hard to say goodbye to people we love.”
“It’s not goodbye, just I’ll see you really soon.”
She laughed. “You didn’t get your optimism from me.”
“Well I doubt I got it from Robert either.” I regretted the words as soon as they left my mouth, but that regret was made worse when I saw my mother’s face.
I quickly tried to back pedal. “I’m sorry.”
She squinted her eyes a little. “I never intended for it to happen, but I’m glad it did.”
“That’s what he said.”
“Yeah?” She blinked a few times as in surprise. “He said he was glad?” Her body relaxed.
“He was surprisingly sentimental.”
“I hardly know him. Or really I don’t know him at all.” She looked so sad. “It’s crazy how someone I don’t know could have changed my life so much.”
“What really happened?” I needed to know. How did Robert not remember yet she did?
“It’s a long story I only want to tell once today.”
“Only once?”
“Trust me. I’ll be telling it after we cross.”
I didn’t push her. Instead I waited for her to continue. “I’m glad he didn’t take things out on you. I was afraid something like that would happen.”
“He seemed glad to have a daughter, but maybe it was all an act. I don’t really know him either.” My gut told me that his words were genuine, but my gut had been proven wrong time and again.
“Trusting your instinct is usually a good thing.”
“But not always,” I whispered.
“No. Not always.” Her echoed words were full of raw sadness. What had happened to make her do what she did? Who was she really? Clearly she wasn’t the same suburban office manager I thought she was.
“I need to warn you of something.”
“Warn me? Is there more?’ I waited with baited breath. Was there really anything worse than what I already knew?
“You may not be welcomed with open arms. They will see you as family, but that doesn’t mean the reception will be an easy one.”
“Because of me? Because of what happened?”
“I don’t want to recount everything yet, but what I will say is when everything happened I got scared, so I ran. I took my best friend with me.”
“Dad? He’s your best friend?”
“Yes. Chris. He did such a great job raising you. He loves you, you know.”
“I miss him. He’s the only one I’ll ever really consider my dad.” I closed my eyes for a second, picturing my dad’s warm eyes, and his ability to forgive so easily.
“I know, honey.”
“Is he a bear too?”
Mom nodded. “Yes. He’s from the same clan as me.”
“Clan? Don’t you call them pacts?”
“Not the group I’m from. We don’t view ourselves in the same way as other shifters.”
I glanced at the twins waiting at the dock. “I know we don’t have much time, but can I ask you something?”
She glanced in the same direction before answering. “Yes.”
“When were you going to tell me? Or were you?”
She shifted her weight from foot to foot. “I was going to tell you when I thought you were ready.”
“You didn’t think I was ready?”
“Why do you think I didn’t want you going away to school? I wanted to protect you.”
“Why is it?” I tried to keep my temper in line. “Why is it that everyone is so set on protecting me?”
“I take it you’re not referring to Toby.” She looked over at him.
“No. I mean he’s protective, but that’s not who I’m talking about. Vera said she left to protect me.”
“And in her way she was. She thought she was dangerous to you.”
“Did she tell you she was leaving? She told Rhett.”
“She didn’t tell me, but she never tells me anything.”
“I could say the same thing about you.”
She took my face in her hands. “I’ve spent the last eighteen years doing everything I could for you. I left my family—my mate. Everything. But I don’t regret it. A mother would do anything for her children, and I wouldn’t want it any other way. I never planned to bring you back here, but you need to understand where you came from, and I can see you need help.”
“It was magic.”
She nodded. “I can tell.”
“How?”
“You seem different, and it’s not just the confidence you’re exuding. Your whole aura is different.”
“You see auras?”
“Not in detail, but I can see some outlines. Yours is off.”
“What if they don’t help me? What if they hurt me instead?”
“You are of ursus blood—and of this clan. They won’t hurt you. Now me, after the way I left, that’s another story.”
“Then don’t come.” I tried to push her back. “Why put yourself in danger?”
“Because running away isn’t going to help anyone.” She took one of my hands. “And I’d do anything to protect you, to help you. I wasn’t there for you through everything you’ve been through these past few months, and I wish I could have been. But I’m here now.”