Finn and I both start at the sound of a car coming up the road to the house. Cars are never a good sign. Not many people on the island have them, and fewer still have a reason to come out here. Usually the only people who come this way are men who don’t take off their hats as they hand over unpaid invoices.
Finn, valiant soul that he is, vanishes, leaving me to it. The same amount of money has to be handed over regardless, but it stings less if you aren’t the one who has to count it out for them.
But it’s not a bill collector. It’s a long, elegant car the size of our kitchen, with a tall, elegant grille the size of a dustbin. It has round, friendly-looking eyeballs with chrome eyebrows; its tailpipe breathes white puffs that creep around the tires. And it is red — not the red of the horse I saw on the beach yesterday, but red like only humans can imagine. Red like candy. Red like you’d like to taste or possibly paint your lips with.
Red, Father Mooneyham often remarks sadly, like sin.
I know the car. It belongs to St. Columba’s, officially, donated to Father Mooneyham for his home visits by a well-meaning parishioner who’d come from the mainland and had some sort of spiritual conversion in the waters near Skarmouth. And it is true that Father Mooneyham travels all over the island in the car, visiting the islanders and giving last rites and first rites and in-between rites. But he never budges from the passenger seat. If he can’t find anyone willing to drive, he uses his bicycle as he did before, never mind that he’s old as sod.
I feel a little bad that Finn has hidden himself in the house, because he would’ve appreciated the grand red car of the priest. I tell myself it serves him right for being a coward.
Before I can properly wonder why Father Mooneyham has come out here, the driver’s side door opens and out steps Peg Gratton. Her feet are armored in dark green rubber boots that are unimpressed by our mud. I see Father Mooneyham fretting over something in the passenger seat, but he remains in the car. It’s Peg who has business with me, and that is a worrying thought.
“Puck,” she says. Her short hair is curled and red — not the same color red as either the car or the horse from the beach — and frazzled appealingly in a way that gives me hope for mine. “Good morning. You have a moment?”
It’s clever the way she says it, not as a question. I would have to contradict her in order to have my moment back. I make a note to use the method in the future.
“Yes,” I say, and then, though it pains me to add it, because the kitchen looks like faeries have been using it for black magic all night, “Would you like some tea?”
“I can’t keep the Father,” Peg says briskly. “He was kind enough to bring me out here.”
This of course is not true, as it was the other way around. I narrow my eyes at her. Seeing the red car reminds me both that I haven’t been to confession in a very long time and that I’ve done a great many things that I ought to confess. It’s not a comfortable feeling.
Now Peg hesitates. She looks around the yard. It is a bit pathetic looking. Every so often I pull the biggest of the weeds out from the edges of the fence and the house, but there are still dark, leafy intruders everyplace things join up. There is not much in the way of proper grass in the stretches in between, just mud. I should tell Finn to fix the wheelbarrow that has passed out in the corner of the yard. But it’s not the mess that Peg’s eyes rest on, it’s the saddle I have set over the fence, next to my brushes. And the coffee can of grain in my hand.
“My husband and I were talking about you last night, right before we went to sleep,” she says, and for some reason, this makes me feel odd, to think of her and ruddy Thomas Gratton in bed together, and to think of them talking about me, of all things. I wonder what they talk about when they aren’t talking about me. The weather, perhaps, or the price of marrow, or the way that tourists always seem to wear white shoes in the rain. I think if I had a butcher husband, that’s what I would talk to him about. Peg continues, “And he seemed to think that you weren’t riding one of the capaill uisce. I said no, that’s not possible. It’s a bad enough decision to ride in the races, without making it complicated.”
“And what did he say?”
“He said he seemed to remember,” Peg says, looking at Dove’s muddy tail, “that the Connollys had a little dun mare by the name of Dove, which I said I thought was what you had me write down on the board last night.”
I hold the coffee can of grain very still. “That’s true,” I say. “Both of those things are true.”
“That’s what I thought. So I told him I was coming down here to talk you out of it.” She looks less than pleased with this idea. I thought it was probably one of those ideas that sounded better when you were lying in bed with your ruddy husband rather than standing in the misty cold morning staring at the reality of me.
“I’m sorry that you came all this way,” I say, although I’m not, and it’s unusual for me to lie before a proper breakfast. “Because I can’t be talked out of it.”
She puts one of her hands on her hip and the other on the back of her head, crushing her curly hair flat. It’s such a fierce posture of frustration that I feel a little bad that I’m the one causing it. “Is it the money?” she asks, finally.
I’m not sure if I’m insulted or not. I mean, clearly, yes, we need the money, but I would’ve had to be the island’s best fool if I thought that I stood a chance of winning against those massive horses.
A part of me prickles at that, and I realize, guiltily, that a tiny, tiny part of me, small enough to dissolve in a teacup or work a blister in the heel of a shoe, must’ve been daydreaming of that possibility. Beating the horses that had killed my parents on a pony that I’d grown up on. I must be the island’s best fool, after all.
“It’s for personal reasons,” I say stiffly. Which is what my mother had always told me to say about things that had to do with fighting with your brothers, getting any sort of illness that had intestinal ramifications, starting your period, and money. And this decision covered two out of the four, so I thought the statement was well earned.
Peg looks at me and I can tell she’s trying to read between the lines. Finally, she says, “I don’t think you know what you’re getting into. It’s a war down there.”
I shrug, which makes me feel like Finn, which makes me wish I hadn’t done it.