“I can kind of tell you why.” I stood up and grabbed her, stopping her in her tracks. “I’ll be doing something similar to what I’m doing here. Protecting someone.”
She looked up at me, her red hair falling behind her shoulders. “A girl?”
“Yeah.” I let go of her and tugged on my hair. “I can’t say who.”
“Shocker,” she said dryly as she covered her face. “I’m sorry, that was bitchy. But I don’t get why you can’t tell me.”
I pulled her hands down from her face, squeezing them slightly. “Wasn’t there ever anything your father was working on that he couldn’t tell you about? A bill or a law?”
“Well, yeah.” She blinked at me. “Lots.”
“Did he tell your mom?”
She shook her head. “No.”
“See? It’s like that.”
She sat down on the couch, but she didn’t make a sound. She just sat there, her eyes staring straight ahead. I sat beside her and held her hand, letting her process it all, and tried to keep quiet for her. I needed her to be okay with this.
After what felt like f**king hours, she looked at me again. She looked so resolute and strong. “Tell me everything you can tell me,” she said, her voice surprisingly steady.
“He knows about us.” I rubbed her lower back gently. “He confronted me, and tried to bribe me to walk away from you. When that—”
She held up a hand. “He did what?”
“He offered me a prestigious promotion. Everything I wanted, if only I walked away from you,” I explained, keeping my voice level.
“What did you say?” she asked, her eyes narrow.
“No, of course.” My hand tightened on hers. “What do you think I said?”
“I don’t even know,” she said, her voice soft. “How did he find out about us?”
“You know how you thought someone was following us?”
“Let me guess. It was his guy?”
“Yep.” I smiled at her and tucked her hair behind her ear. “Your father asked him to send a guy to watch me. To make sure I was doing my job and not lounging about my apartment all day. He started watching when we were in our fight.” I cleared my throat and looked away. I didn’t like to think about that time of my life. “So at first, he didn’t see anything but me following you. But then…”
“We made up.”
I nodded. “And he saw a hell of a lot, and reported back to Captain Richards.”
“Oh God.” She paled. “Did he tell Dad?”
I shook my head and grabbed my beer. “Nope. Because he has a plan for me, and it involves me leaving on Tuesday morning.”
“Which is the part you can’t tell me.”
I took a long sip. “Right. Maybe afterward, but not now.”
“How long will you be gone? Will he tell Dad after? What does he want from you? When will—?”
I chuckled and pressed a finger to her mouth. “I don’t know. And no, he’s letting us handle the when and how of telling your dad, but after this it’ll be easier.”
“Why?” she asked through my fingers.
I got all excited thinking about what I was going to get for just a few weeks of work. “He’s giving me the opportunity to change my MOS and become an officer, no military hoopla or shit to deal with. Just a quick transfer. I can go to college, fully paid for by Uncle Sam, and enter any field I want after this mission is complete. I can do anything. Be anything.”
She bit down on her lip, her blue eyes examining my face. “Are you sure this isn’t a way to split us up?”
“I’m sure.” I leaned back against the couch. “After this, your father will have no reason to object because I’m going to be a commissioned officer.”
She forced a smile. “That’s great, and I’m happy for you. I really am, but what will this mean to us?”
“I can go to college, here even. We can be together, and even better? He promised to make sure my father gets his bonus, no matter what.”
Her fingers tightened on mine. “So no more lying?”
“I still want you to wait until I’m back to tell your father.” I drank another sip of my beer, and she picked up her wine cooler with a shaking hand. “I don’t want you to do it alone. Once I’m home, we can come clean. Tell him we’re in love. No more lies.”
Her eyes lit up for the first time since I’d told her my news. She licked her lips, not dropping my gaze. “How long will you be gone?”
“It’s looking like I’ll be home after Christmas. It’s in the early stages, but I think it’ll be January at the latest.”
“That’s…” She swallowed hard. “More than a month away.”
“Yeah, but it’ll pass fast, I’m sure.” I grabbed her hands, holding them to my lips and kissing them. “And when it’s over, we’ll be free. We can be together, no guilt or deception. Just us, going to college together like normal people.”
She smiled at me, but the tears in her eyes kind of ruined it. “That’s great, Finn.”
“You don’t look happy.” I kissed her hand again. “This is good. I know it sucks I won’t be home for Christmas, but it’s worth it. I’m doing this for us, Ginger.”
“I know.” She pulled free and placed her hands on both my cheeks. “And I love you so freaking much for it. For making this happen. I’m just scared. I can’t…I can’t lose you, Finn. I just can’t.”
Her voice broke off, and she pressed her lips together, tears streaming down her cheeks. My heart clenched in my chest. I’d been expecting anger about having to keep my whereabouts a secret. Maybe a fight. I hadn’t been expecting tears.
Logistically, this move made sense. It would solve all our issues, and give me a huge pay raise and life change. A f**king gigantic one. I’d only be gone for almost two months, and then I’d be back, and we’d be free. It was a simple decision.
This was a good move.
“I don’t get why you’re crying. I’ll be fine, babe. It’s not as dangerous as war, I promise you that,” I said, kissing her tears away. They were salty and warm on my tongue, and I couldn’t f**king keep up with them. “Please don’t cry.”
“I’m s-sorry.” She took a shaky breath and closed her eyes. “I’ll stop. I’m being stupid.”