Being drunk might not help her remember anything, but it would make forgetting much easier to deal with.
Tony cleared his throat. “So, have you remembered anything else?”
“No. Just the one flash.”
“Is there something in particular you want to remember? Something I can help with?”
“Do you always ask such obvious questions?”
He laughed dryly. “There’s that sense of humor I lo—adore.”
Rebecca rolled her eyes. One thing at a time, right? She considered, then asked, “What did I do before I lost my job? What was my career?”
He tensed and looked away. “Honestly? You mostly…volunteered and helped at the hospital, I think.”
“That’s nice.” She pursed her lips. “But jobs like those don’t pay. How did I make enough money to cover my bills?”
“Waitressing, mostly.”
“Waitressing?” She shook her head. “I thought I would have been something else. Like…” She fumbled, and landed on a spark of familiarity. “…like an engineer.”
“An engineer? Really?” He smiled and rubbed his jaw. “I think I could see that. You’re stubborn and refuse to fail in anything. You keep pushing until you find the right solution.”
She snorted. “But I ended up a waitress. I’m guessing I didn’t go to college. Or get a degree.”
“You could,” he suggested, his eyes catching hers. “You could go to school and get that degree.”
“Maybe.” She sighed. What point was there in thinking about that when she didn’t even know what she’d wanted, before? Clearing her throat, she shifted her position and wrapped her arms around her raised knees. “How did we meet?”
“I was packing to move out of my house after the bank foreclosed on the mortgage and seized my plumbing business. Bad time to be looking for a plumber, I guess, but there you were. I couldn’t fill the position, but I offered to fill a few more for you.” He grinned. “After offering you a drink, of course. I am a gentleman.”
“Yeah. Right. I may not remember much, but I don’t need my memory to know you’re full of shit.”
He laughed. “You wound me, my lady. I’m a true gentleman, through and through. If anything, you took advantage of me.”
“Uh-huh.” She eyed him. “Sure.”
Tony muffled another laugh against the rim of his glass. “I can’t be that bad. You agreed to go out with me. We fell into things pretty fast, and when your lease was up we decided we might as well move in together.” A sly smile teased at the corners of his mouth. “We haven’t killed each other yet. I’d call that a success.”
“You must have laid one hell of a line on me, to get me to move in with you that fast.”
He grinned. “How’d you know it wasn’t your idea?”
“I—” Rebecca paused, frowning. “I guess I don’t.” She shrugged one shoulder and looked down into her wine glass. “Was it?”
“Rebecca.” His hand was warm on her shoulder, his voice soft in her ear. “It doesn’t matter. What matters is you’re here, and I promise I’ll take care of you.”
Her voice caught in her throat. “Guess you’re just my guardian angel, huh?”
Tony said nothing, but his hand fell away from her shoulder. The loss of contact ached. She looked up to find him staring across the room, his eyes hard. He took another deep drink of wine.
“Tony?” she asked. “What did I say?”
“Nothing,” he muttered, and let out a heavy breath. He closed his eyes. When he opened them again, his easy smile was back. “It’s just strange to hear you say that when I’ve always thought you were my angel, sent straight from heaven to save me.”
Rebecca frowned. He was confusing her. Hot one minute, cold the next. Had she imagined his unease?
His smile faltered. “Say something before I feel like an even bigger jackass than I already do?”
“You’re not a jackass.” She touched the back of his hand. He turned his palm up and caught her fingers, lacing theirs together. The pad of his thumb stroked over the backs of her knuckles, and her heart rate doubled.
“If you can’t remember yourself, you can’t remember me, either,” he said, an odd hitch in the words. “For all you know, I’m the biggest jackass in the world.”
“I can’t believe that. Not after how good you’ve been to me.”
He only looked at her. The pain and misery in his eyes made her want to soothe them away. Kiss him until he couldn’t hurt anymore, and until she no longer felt like screaming with all the questions ripping her apart. Darting her tongue over her lips, she leaned closer. His eyes dropped to her mouth, and there was no mistaking the hunger there. The raw, agonizing need.
But he jerked away, and released her hand. “It’s nothing. What any friend would do.”
Hurt lashed through her. “You keep saying ‘friend.’“ She curled her hand in her lap. She could still feel the tingling warmth of his touch. “Are you trying to tell me something?”
“Of course not.” He stared down into his empty wine glass. “Looks like I’m dry. I’ll get us some mo—”
“Tony.”
No answer. His fingers tightened on the glass until it squeaked. Rebecca ground her teeth.
“Tell me what’s going on, or so help me…”
“I can’t.” Barely a whisper, but his voice cracked. “I can’t tell you. And I can’t kiss you again. I can’t be that close to you.”
“Why?” Rebecca’s fingers clenched until her nails bit into her palms. “You said I was your girlfriend.”
“It’s not right. Not until your memory returns. I’d feel like I was taking advantage of you, and I don’t want you to hate—” He took a shuddering breath. “I don’t want you to have any regrets.”
“You don’t want me to hate you.”
He didn’t deny it. Didn’t do anything save to tilt his head back against the couch and close his eyes.
“Why?” Still nothing. She wanted to shake him. “What aren’t you telling me?”
“Nothing, damn it!” He stood and practically flung the wine glass onto the coffee table. Swearing, he paced away from her, then whirled to face her. “For once in my life, I’m trying to do the right thing. Just let me, okay?”