She had never felt so close to a man in her life. Who would have guessed that beneath that cold, controlled facade there was such elemental, sensual need? Yes, it had been a risk allowing him to sweep her off to bed like this, a risk she had feared from the beginning. But it had paid off in terms of commitment and understanding.
For neither of them, she knew, could ever go back to where they had been before. Judd was no longer the hunter from the sky come to carry her off to destruction. He couldn’t be. The two of them had just forged the most fundamental sort of bond. From this moment on Judd would be able to trust her. How could he unite them so completely and not be able to trust completely also?
For the first time in weeks a sense of welcome relief settled on Honor as she lay beside Judd. She had been facing the crisis so long and had been so alone that it seemed like a miracle to at last have an ally.
“What are you thinking, honey?” Judd asked softly, stirring slightly beside her.
“Oh, Judd. I feel as if a great weight has been lifted from my shoulders. You can’t imagine what a relief it is to feel so close to you now. I was so afraid of you.”
His hand caught her shoulder and squeezed. “I don’t want you [_to _]be afraid of me, sweetheart. Not ever.”
“No.” Her voice was lazy with contentment. “In the morning we can talk.”
His grip on her shoulder tightened. “That’s right, honey. We’ll talk in the morning. We’ll get everything straightened out.”
Her fingers trailed lightly along his chest and she yawned daintily. “That first night…”
“Hmmm? What about that first night?” His voice sounded somewhat distant, as if he were sorting through his own private thoughts.
“I’m just wondering what it would have been like if you’d gone ahead and made love to me,” she confessed.
“I’ve wondered the same thing,” he murmured with a trace of amusement in his voice. “I’ve wondered like hell! But I couldn’t have guessed it would be this good. Nothing’s ever been this good for me, Honor.”
She tried to resist but couldn’t. The temptation was too much and she was feeling too lighthearted and close to him. “Not even kissing your airplane?”
That brought her a small, sharp slap on her naked rear end. “One of these days, Honor Knight, you’re going to go too far with that lousy joke.”
“I can’t wait,”
“You enjoy baiting me, don’t you?” he asked, not sounding upset by the notion, merely interested.
“Sometimes. It’s a way of getting a response from you. A human response.”
“Now you know there’s another way, don’t you?”
She could sense that he was smiling and lifted her head to check. She saw him smile so rarely. He was. Not a huge, laughing, masculine grin, just a small, upward tilt to his hard mouth, but it was there and it was real. And it was also in his eyes. That fact pleased her most of all.
“Yes,” she agreed with rash pleasure. “Now I know there’s another way.”
“Good. Go to sleep, honey. We’ll talk in the morning.” Trustingly she obeyed, curving her body close to his and relaxing into the promised security of his arms. In the morning everything would be all right.
“There’s not much room on this cot, is there?” she noted, yawning again.
“We’ll manage. Just don’t wriggle too much.” “Yes, sir.” She said with a chuckle and promptly fell asleep.
* * *
It wasn’t the sun that woke her the next morning, it was the realization that someone was rustling around the tiny shack. Honor smiled to herself, opening her eyes slowly. Perhaps Judd was going to surprise her with breakfast. Had Paco already been by with the daily egg ration? She hadn’t heard him knock.
In the dawn light she saw Judd across the room. He was packing his small overnight kit, not fixing breakfast.
“Judd? Why are you up so early? What are you doing?” She sat up slowly, frowning in bewilderment.
“I’m getting ready to leave, Honor. What do you think I’m doing. This is Saturday, remember?”
“So?”
“So this is the day I take you back to the man you claim isn’t your father. This is the day you said you’d go with me in the Cessna without any more fuss. Better get up, honey. It’s getting late. I want to get off the ground as soon as possible.”
Honor could only sit with the sheet clutched to her chin, staring at the stranger who had been her lover during the night. [_He meant it. _]He was still going to take her back to Garrison and Prager. She couldn’t believe it.
A sick, panicky feeling welled up inside her. For a moment she thought she was going to faint. Where was the man who had become her ally and friend? Where was the man who had learned to trust her? With whom she had forged a sensual bond last night?
It was obvious that Judd Raven was still intent on being the unwitting instrument of her destruction. He trusted her no more this morning than he had yesterday.
Going to bed with him had changed nothing.
Chapter 6
Judd saw the sudden whiteness of her cheeks and he started toward the bed, an uneasy feeling motivating him. He couldn’t forget that scar on her wrist. Honor Knight appeared to be prone to the melodramatic and he didn’t want any complications in his plans this morning.
“Honor!” he snapped sharply.
She looked up at him, hazel eyes huge with disbelief and pain. “Last night meant nothing at all to you, did it?” she whispered.
Was that all that was wrong? Judd almost smiled in relief. “Honey, last night was wonderful and you know it. I realize you probably want a little cuddling this morning, that’s natural. But there just isn’t time. I’ve got plans—”
“A little cuddling!” She looked utterly appalled. “I don’t want a little cuddling! I want a little trust! So last night was wonderful, was it? By that I take it you mean I was a good lay?”
“Honor.” He frowned, uncertain about where all this was leading but knowing he was going to have to put a stop to it before it turned into” some form of feminine hysteria.
“Well,” she dared, her eyes far too bright, her body drawn as taut as a bow string. “Well, Mr. Raven? Was I good? I mean, considering the fact that I am, after all, only a suicidal, runaway, neurotic female? Was last night worth the extra few days you spent here in Mexico?”
“Honor,” he tried coldly, “don’t turn hysterical on me. I don’t have time for a lot of dramatics this morning.”