After dealing with drunk Angus, taking care of him and keeping him safe, I was tired, cranky, and the implication raised my hackles. “I thought you might be at the library.”
Yeah, that made it pretty clear I knew she was shitting me earlier. I held her eyes for a couple beats until her gaze slid away. For the first time, like, ever, I didn’t want to sleep in the same room with her. We were best friends, and she was lying to me; it hurt her, too, I could tell, but not enough for her to stop. She let me push past and out the door.
I had no idea where I was going until my feet carried me to Ty’s place. It’s too late. He’s probably in bed. So I wheeled without knocking, but his door opened as I moved away.
Tired eyes, running pants, black T-shirt. He opened his arms. I kissed him.
“Rough night?” he asked when we broke apart.
“Yeah. I’m sorry to bother you.”
“You can come in if you need to talk.”
Probably I shouldn’t, but dumping your problems was definitely a friend thing to do, and I could use the opinion of someone who didn’t live with us. So I sat down while he brewed some tea—in an actual kettle, I noticed—and I told him about the drama with Lauren and Angus.
When I ran out of words, he had me snuggled close, a hot mug in my hands. I was so upset I didn’t even notice it happening.
“Okay, Angus, you did fine, he needed to cut loose. Lauren obviously has something going on. Sometimes people just aren’t ready to talk. Whatever it is, it’s making her feel...” He paused, trying to think of the right word. “Lonely. But it’s not your fault. And you can’t help unless she lets you. I get why you’re upset, though. Try not to hold it against her.”
I cupped his cheek and kissed him softly. “You’re good at this.”
“I’m out of practice,” he admitted. “It’s been a while since anyone but Sam dumped their problems in my lap and expected me to make sense of them.”
“Sorry to bother you so late.”
“I couldn’t sleep.” At the curious tilt of my head, he added, “Started to worry when you didn’t answer my texts, nothing since I said, Soon. In my head, I went immediately to, I’ll never talk to her again and never find out why.”
Courtesy of Diana.
It was stunning to hear Ty admit to overthinking things, just like I did. “I turned my phone off for class and forgot to turn it back on. I promise, if I ever decide this isn’t working, I won’t vanish, and we’ll talk before it ends. Okay?”
“Thanks,” he said softly.
I wished I could lead him to the bedroom and lose myself in him. Sex would be amazing, the perfect remedy for a shitty day. A wistful thorn pricked my palm, the yearning for more than he could give. When I came in, I was a mess, but now there was only love, welling up with the irresistible force of laughter or tears.
A love I couldn’t acknowledge if I wanted him to stay.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
Friday morning, Angus was so hungover he couldn’t move without moaning.
I couldn’t stay home to coddle him, though; maybe Lauren or Max would take over. Before I left, I put water, crackers and ibuprofen on his bedside table. He fumbled through the remedies then pulled the covers over his head.
“You’ll be okay,” I told him.
“Thanks, Nadia.” The words came out muffled.
Exhausted, I ate breakfast, rushed out to class and then drove to C-Cool. Talking and texting, students eddied around me. A few kids were already in Ms. Parker’s room; one of them liked to follow me around, which freaked me out at the beginning of the year. Now I chatted with her while putting away my things. All things considered, the practicum went well. Instead of getting in my mentor’s way, I anticipated her requests a couple of times.
She tapped my shoulder as I was leaving. “I know it’s tough, and you’re having doubts, but the kids respond to you, and the patience you possess naturally, it’s a gift, Nadia. I’ve known people to bail, even at this stage.”
“I appreciate hearing it. I’m hanging in.” It would get better once the schedule change started at Rainbow Academy.
But for now, I had to run. Because I’d chatted with Ms. Parker, there was no convenience-store sandwich, but Louisa was waiting for me at the classroom with a plate she’d saved from lunch. I suspected Mrs. Keller had asked her to mother me, after our talk the other day.
“Careful, if the kids see it, they’ll ask for seconds.”
In five minutes, I scarfed the corn dog, carrots and celery, and the apple slices. It wasn’t enough to fill me up, but I’d be nicer to a class full of four-year-olds if my stomach wasn’t growling the whole time. With thirty seconds to spare, I darted into Mrs. Trent’s room, feeling like I’d won the Boston Marathon.
“You’re all sweaty,” Sam said, running over to hug me.
I patted him on the head. Sometimes it was hard not to show favoritism. “Why did the dinosaur cross the road?”
“To get to the other side?”
“Good guess, but no. Because the chicken hadn’t been invented yet!”
He giggled. “That was stupid.”
“Hey, you’re the one who loves these.” Hopefully, the internet wouldn’t run out of dinosaur material before he grew out of this stage.
I survived Friday and spent the weekend studying, as this was my last chance; next week I’d be taking midterms. Lauren and I didn’t talk much, but Angus was doing better, so Thursday night was worth the drama. Max was around less both Saturday and Sunday. If he was prepping for his exams or working more, I had no idea.
Sunday night, I got a text from Ty.
I’m free the weekend of the 25th. Are you?
That was next weekend. I might be wiped from midterms, work and the practicum, but I had no plans.
What did you have in mind? I sent back.
You. Me. All weekend.
Suddenly I had more energy than I knew what to do with. My hands actually trembled when I asked,
Are you asking me to spend the weekend with you?
At my place, he clarified, like I really thought we were going on vacation together.
Can’t wait.
That was a massive understatement.
During the next week, the promise of the twenty-fifth acted on me like a lure, spurring me on. I didn’t sleep at all Sunday night, and on Monday, I was bleary-eyed but jacked up on energy drinks. I raced through the tests like the information was liquid that might trickle out my ears and onto my desk. My brain actually felt like that might be true.