Anyway, she had a son to think about and a life to rebuild. She was better off alone for the time being. Maybe Mike was coming around, but it was more than two years too late. And Booker probably felt the same way about her.
The nurse showed up with the baby.
“Meet Troy,” Katie told him, taking her son in her arms and turning him so Mike could see his face.
“Troy? How’d you pick that name?” Mike asked.
“Booker suggested it. It’s his middle name.”
Mike’s eyebrows shot up. “You named your baby after Booker?”
“He delivered him,” she said.
“Is that the only reason?”
Katie couldn’t meet his eyes.
“Katie?”
“What?”
“Does Booker know how you feel?”
“I don’t think so,” she said.
“Well, you should tell him. He’s tough to read, but Rebecca knows him better than anyone, and she already gave you her opinion.”
“I heard her say that Booker’s never told her how he feels. He probably cares about me the way he does about the other poor unfortunates he helps. That’s all. Anyway—” she pulled her baby’s cap down over his tiny ears “—I have enough to deal with right now, don’t you think?”
He studied her and Troy for a minute. “Maybe you’re right.”
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
REBECCA SAT ON THE CLOSED lid of the toilet while Josh hovered over her shoulder, trying to get a glimpse of the pregnancy indicator and praying that this time it would show pink. They were in the bathroom of their Austin hotel room, doing this yet again. It seemed they’d done countless pregnancy tests over the past year—too many, in his opinion. He wanted to put the whole baby thing on hold for a while, have his wife step back and come to grips with the fact that she might never get pregnant. It tore him up inside to see the devastation on her face at each new disappointment. Somehow she’d gotten it into her head that she’d be less of a woman, less of a wife to him, if she failed to give him children. He had to convince her that he loved her for better or worse, regardless.
But he knew, for her, it wasn’t that simple. Her insecurities stemmed from her youth and the fact that she’d never felt good enough to please her father.
“Honey, we could always adopt, you know that, don’t you?” he said, the tension in the room increasing as they waited. “And there’s no rush.”
She looked from the second hand on her watch to the indicator, and didn’t respond.
“Honey?”
“I’m pregnant this time. I know it,” she murmured. “I feel different.”
She always said that. They’d immediately rush out to buy an in-home pregnancy test and learn that it had all been wishful thinking. Afterward, she’d be depressed for days. She’d eventually rebound and be herself for a week or two. Then the whole hope-disappointment-despair cycle would start all over again.
“Besides—” her eyes continued to dart back and forth between the watch and the indicator “—I missed the birth of Katie’s baby. Surely fate wouldn’t be so cruel.”
“Rebecca, I can’t keep watching you do this to yourself,” he said. “I care more about you than I do about having a baby. And this isn’t good for you. You hate needles, so the daily fertility shots are bad enough. But the pressure of this—” he sighed “—this constant trying and hoping and testing is miserable.”
“It’s going to be worth it,” she said. “Delaney and I are going to be pregnant at the same time. You’ll see.”
Delaney…Ever since Delaney had gotten pregnant, Rebecca had been that much worse. “I want to rethink our plan,” he said. “I want to check into adoption.”
The indicator turned blue, and his wife’s shoulders slumped, just as he’d known they would.
Shit! He hated this.
“Beck, come here.” Taking her in his arms, he held her close. “Can’t we forget about trying for a baby, just for a while?”
“Your family didn’t want you to marry me in the first place,” she said.
“That’s got nothing to do with this. Anyway, they didn’t really know you.”
“We grew up across the street from each other.”
“They’re growing to love you more every day. Look at how well you and Mike are getting along.”
“I just want a baby. Is that too much to ask?”
“I’ve been trying to tell you that we can adopt. Adoption is perfectly fine as far as I’m concerned.
“But I want your baby,” she said. “That’s all I’ve ever wanted.”
He lifted her chin and kissed her. “I love you. But I’ll only allow you to go through this one more month. Then I’m going to insist we put everything on hold for at least a year.”
No response. Just the tears that wet his shirt as he held her.
“Okay?” he prompted.
He knew she’d finally had enough, too, when he felt her nod.
“KATIE HAD HER BABY last night. Everyone’s talking about it,” Tami told her husband as he came in the back door of the bakery after taking out the garbage.
The closing door cut off the bright ray of afternoon sunlight that had momentarily blinded her. “Who told you?” he asked.
“Louise over at Finley’s Grocery told Mona at Hair and Now, who told Mrs. Bertleson while she was getting her nails done.”
“That was Mrs. Bertleson in here a minute ago?”
“Yes.”
“I thought she was on a diet.”
Tami curled her fingernails into her palms. “She was buying doughnuts to take to her grandkids. Aren’t you listening to me?”
He sighed and shoved a hand through his hair. “I heard you. Mrs. Bertleson said Katie had her baby. What is it, a boy or a girl?”
“I don’t know. She congratulated me on becoming a grandmother. I didn’t want to let on I didn’t know about the birth of my own grandchild by asking the sex!”
“So, what did you say?”
“I mumbled thanks, but my heart was beating so fast I could hardly speak. It’s only April, which means Katie had the baby two months early. Two months! A baby that premature can face so many problems—”
“If the baby wasn’t okay, Mrs. Bertleson would have said something about that, too. Word spreads fast in a town this size.” He turned his back on her and started sweeping.