“Sorry about that,” she said. “I’ll come another day.” Baxter commuted to a brokerage house in San Francisco four days a week. As long as her health held out, she would have other opportunities.
“I can count on that? You haven’t been returning my calls,” he said.
“I’ve been busy.”
“Getting your grandparents’ place ready to sell? Is the job really that all-consuming? I mean, it’s been five years. I hate to sound harsh, but maybe I could understand your complete absorption in this if they’d just died.”
“I miss them.”
“To the point that you can’t take a few hours for your friends? You haven’t joined us at the coffeehouse in a month. For some reason, you’re shutting us all out. Except Kyle.”
She heard the undercurrent in those last two words. He suspected she and Kyle were more involved than they’d been letting on. Some of the others did, too. Eve had once asked, point-blank, if they were sleeping together. But that was before they’d become intimate, so Callie had felt comfortable saying no.
“You know where I live,” she told Baxter. “It’s just that Kyle comes over and you don’t.”
“Because I’ve never been invited.”
The TV went on. Apparently, Levi wasn’t ready to sleep. “Kyle doesn’t sit back and wait for an invitation.”
“Why do you think that is?”
There it was again. What she’d done with Kyle was another reason she’d been pulling away from the group. She was embarrassed by her own behavior.
She considered admitting that she’d slept with Kyle. If nothing else, the revelation would throw Baxter off the trail of what else was going on in her life. But she quickly decided against it. She had no right to divulge anything without Kyle’s consent.
Besides, what had happened between them—it was just a blip on the radar, an anomaly, a...lapse. And it was over. Somehow, since Levi had appeared on her porch, she hadn’t even thought about getting naked with Kyle, except to be mortified that she’d let the situation interfere with her good judgment in the first place.
“Is it because he likes me more than you do?” she asked, putting a teasing lilt in her voice just in case.
“I’d say he likes you in a different way.”
She cleared her throat. “We all have our secrets, right?”
When he immediately let it go and changed the subject, she felt more confident than ever that she’d guessed one of his.
“So what’s up?” he said. “How are things going with your guest?”
Relieved by the shift in the conversation, she drew a deep breath. “Kyle told you about Levi?”
“He’s still returning my calls. We had a drink together last night.”
She ignored the jab. “And?”
“He’s worried.”
But not just about Levi. Kyle had been the only one to spend much time with her in the past three weeks, the only one to see her begin to feel worse and worse as her bilirubin count went up.
“There’s nothing to worry about,” she said. “If Levi was going to murder me, he would’ve done it by now.”
“It’s not like you to take in some drifter.”
“This isn’t some drifter.”
“Who is he, then?”
“A man who needs a helping hand. A vet who’s served our country.”
“I admire the patriotism. But from what I’ve heard, he’s also a loner who might be damaged beyond repair. Have you considered that?”
She’d thought of little else. But instead of being frightened or repelled, she wanted to help him. That desire was taking over her life, and she was grateful she’d found such a compelling cause. Before he’d shown up, each day had been harder than the last. He’d made what she was going through easier just by being around.
Last night, for example. What would she have done on her own? Spent hours upon hours on the bathroom floor without the strength to stumble to her bed?
“Doesn’t matter,” she said. “Whatever his situation, I want to do what I can for him.”
“Selfless and admirable. Or...is there more to it?”
“By that you’re suggesting...”
“Is he also someone you find attractive?”
Callie pictured Levi as she’d seen him earlier, on the ladder with his sweat-dampened T-shirt clinging to his muscular torso. “Definitely.”
“Ah...riddle solved.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, you have ulterior motives.”
She almost denied it but laughed instead. “Maybe—to a certain extent. Would that be so bad?”
“Yes. Because then he could hurt you in a whole new way.”
She doubted Levi could hear her above the program he was watching, but she lowered her voice just in case. “I’m not
expecting a commitment from him. He’ll be leaving soon.”
“So we’re talking about...sex?”
She supposed they were. For whatever reason, she felt a compulsion to get closer to him, but she’d convinced herself that it stemmed from her desire to “fix” him, since she couldn’t fix herself. “That’s part of it.”
“Oh, jeez,” Baxter said. “Whatever you do, make sure he’s clean.”
“Don’t act like he’ll...contaminate me!” she whispered harshly.
“Someone needs to caution you. You don’t know him, so you’d be taking a huge risk—and you’re not really the risk-taking kind. You still regret that one-night stand you had after Peter broke up with you, despite the fact that you went out looking to get laid!”
“The memory is revolting! I regretted it even while I was doing it.”
He chuckled at her passionate response. “How do you know this would be any different?”
She didn’t think she could adequately explain, but she made the attempt. “He excites me. I close my eyes and...he’s who I dream about. I wasn’t attracted to that other guy. I just wanted someone to reassure me that I was desirable, that it wasn’t my fault Peter preferred men.”
“Sexuality doesn’t work that way.”
“A fact I understand now. I was twenty, remember?”
“I get all that. But...you changed before Levi showed up. So none of this really relates.”
“Of course it does.”
“Callie...what’s going on?”