“Even more what?” I frowned and stared into his hazel eyes.
“You’ll figure it out one day.” He shook his head and ran his hand through his silky hair. “Now scoot. I’ve got things to do.”
I walked out of his room with a huge smile on my face, even though I’d just been dismissed. He had enjoyed kissing me, I was sure of that. Maybe one day, we’d be kissing for real.
I stopped in the hallway, rested my head against the wall, and closed my eyes. It was now hitting me. I had just kissed Hudson Blake. The boy of my dreams, even though no one else knew that.
Chapter 3
Hudson
Five Years Ago
“Hudson, let’s go to the Sigma Kappa party tonight.” Luke stood at the door to my dorm with wide, eager eyes.
“I have a test tomorrow.” I shook my head.
“Dude, there are going to be lots of hot girls. We might even get laid.” He grinned and walked into the room. “Plus, think of all the times in high school you convinced me to play video games when I had a test the next day.”
“Dude, that was on you. I didn’t make you do anything.” I grinned back at him and he shook his head.
“Come on, Hudson.” He sat on my bed and I pushed him off. “Don’t you want to get some?”
“Not really.” I shook my head and looked down. There was only one girl who set my heart on fire.
“Come on! The girls are hot. You know sorority girls. They love to give it up easy.”
“I don’t want a girl who gives it up easy.”
“Dude, just come for me then. And at least you can tell Eden and Riley that they shouldn’t join sororities when they go to college because you know firsthand how slutty the girls are.”
“I’m not going to tell my sister and her best friend that sorority girls are slutty.” I gave him a look and he laughed.
“Dude, it’s going to be epic. What are you doing? You’re ruining the college experience for us.”
“I’m not,” I lied. I knew I was.
I hadn’t really been to any parties since we’d started college. Sure, I’d been to a few and had a few hookups here and there, but nothing special. I hadn’t met any girls who’d touched me in any sort of way. But I couldn’t tell Luke why. He’d laugh if he knew I had a crush on Riley.
She was supposed to be like my little sister, but I couldn’t stop myself from feeling more for her. I think the day I taught her to kiss was the catalyst of my affections. Her response had been so sweet, yet so primal. I’d been ashamed of myself for feeling something for her. Something that was far from innocent.
“Whatever.” Luke walked to the door in a huff. “Live your life like some monk. See where that gets you.” He stopped at the door and turned towards me before he left. “I thought this was going to be the time of our lives, but frankly, you’re making it really shitty. Some best friend you are.”
There were a million responses I could have come back with. The one on the tip of my tongue was something along the lines of, “Then get some more friends and stop harassing me.” But I knew I couldn’t say that. For all his bravado, Luke was very sensitive and emotional. So I replied in the only way I knew how. “Fine, I’ll be ready at eight, but I’m not staying out late.”
“Don’t worry about it, dude.” He grinned in pure joy at me. “I’m sure I’ll be in some back bedroom by nine, so you can leave then.”
“Uh huh. Are you sure you want to sleep in someone else’s house?”
“Asshole. I won’t be sleeping. I’ll be doing that slow grind.”
I laughed as he started moving his arms and hips and covered my eyes. “Please, that is not an image I want to be seeing right now.”
“I’ll see you later.” He laughed as he left the room, and I jumped up and grabbed my book bag to head to the library.
I knew I still had to study for the test or I was going to fail. I grabbed my books and my laptop and quickly put them in my bag. I was about to leave the room, but instead I went back and pulled up my pillow.
There was a photo of Riley at the beach, and I stared at it for a few seconds before touching my finger to my lips and then to the photo. I put the photo down and covered it gently with my pillow before I walked out of the dorm. I sighed as I walked to the library.
I was starting to feel like a bit of a loser spending my days thinking about Riley. She wasn’t my girlfriend, and for all I knew, she had a boyfriend. There was no way I was going to make a move on her. She was still in high school and lived hours away. And she was my sister’s best friend. And her mom had asked me to look after her. There were way too many reasons for me to not follow my feelings. Because really, I didn’t even understand how I felt.
***
There were five girls running around the room doing shots and pulling off various items of clothing when Luke and I made it to the party at nine. We both grabbed a beer as soon as we walked into the house.
“This is why I love sorority parties. Such easy access to alcohol.”
“Sure. That’s why you love them.” I rolled my eyes, chugged my Bud Light, and looked around. I watched a hot redhead pulling off her top and grinned. Maybe this wasn’t going to be so bad after all.
“Hey, bad boy.” A cute girl with long blond hair walked up to me and stroked my chest. “What are you doing here?”
“Excuse me?” I frowned up at her. “What do you mean?’
“Don’t you belong at some bikers’ meeting or something with those tattoos?”
“I’m not a biker.” I frowned again and stepped back. “Sorry.”
“Oh, don’t be sorry. You’re still sexy as hell.” She stepped towards me again, but this time she stumbled and fell against me. “Oops.” She giggled.
“Lara.” Another girl ran over to us and gave me an apologetic look. “Lara, I think it’s time for us to leave.” The girl smiled at her friend and then at me. She had a sweet smile, and I stared back at her.
“I’m not going anywhere. We just got here.”
“Come on, Lara.” The girl tried again. “You’ve had too much to drink.”
“No, I haven’t.” Lara hiccupped and I laughed.
“What time did you guys start drinking?” I asked the new girl.
“Lara’s been drinking since six.” The girl rolled her pretty brown eyes. “I don’t drink.”