My eyes widen in surprise.
What did she just say?
I stop myself from jumping in the air and kicking my heels together. Instead, I kiss the top of her head and hug her around the shoulders. “It won’t be bad. It’ll be fun. We’re having an adventure, me and you.”
Her small hand comes up to rest on mine and she utters a shaky, “I’m sorry, Daddy. I haven’t been very nice to you.”
I don’t bother accepting her apology. It’s been, it’s done, and it’s over. “Love you.”
I feel a tear drip from her cheek onto my forearm. She sniffles, “I love you, too.”
My heart lightens. I take hold of the handles of her chair and start wheeling her back to the house. As soon as we get through the front door, I tell her, “You want to get your things ready?”
She smiles up at me and nods. Then she’s gone. I find myself on the arm of the sofa, biting my lip, looking into nothingness. Nik startles me when his hand comes down on my shoulder. I jump, but when I see it’s just him, I breathe deep. “Fuck, man.”
“I know.”
I exhale shakily. “No, really.”
He squeezes my shoulder. “I know.”
My hand comes up to pinch the bridge of my nose. I look up at him. “I don’t think…” I shrug.
He shakes his head. “You’re not workin’ tonight. Not after that. Go and take your girl out. Get ice cream. Have some fun.”
It takes me a moment to respond. Even then, it’s quiet. Too quiet. “Thanks, man.”
Ceecee comes out of her room with her backpack over the side of her chair. She wheels herself over to me and narrows her eyes at my smile. She asks a long and drawn out, “What?”
I pick up my car keys. “Change of plan.” I jiggle the keys. “How about dinner and a movie?”
Her face morphs into shock. She asks on a whisper, “Really?”
I shoot her a well, duh look. “Uh, yeah.”
She sputters, “But…but why?”
I shrug. “I need a reason?”
She looks left, then right, then nods.
Leaning back against the dining table, I stroke my chin. “I see. Then I would like to take my girl out for the following reasons.” I count them on my fingers. “Number one, you’re my daughter and I love you. Number two, you’re the only person in the world who can out-eat me in ice cream. Number three,” I lean closer and mock whisper, “you’re much better company than all those old people.”
Nik calls out, “I heard that!”
Tina adds, “I did too!”
Mom returns, “We’ll see who’s old next time you come over begging me to feed you!”
I mutter, “Whoops.” Ceecee giggles. I smile down at her and hold my hand out. “Now can I take you out?”
Smiling big, she responds, “I’d like that, Daddy.” Then I proceed to take my little one out for pizza, a movie, and ice cream.
And we have a blast.
***
Max
As I lie in bed at the end of a great night out with my daughter, it hits me what happened tonight. It hits me hard. That I may not have found her. That she could’ve been gone. Forever. My eyes sting beneath my closed lids. I cry silently under the covers for a long time.
No one said being a parent was easy.
***
Helena
The White Rabbit is just how I remembered it. I’m glad to be back.
I spent the afternoon getting ready with Nat, seeing as she had the afternoon off. Most of the afternoon was spent eating, bitching at each other, Nat throwing clothes at me excitedly, and me kicking clothes away, wearing a look of disgust.
No offence to my sister, but she’s much more open about her body than I am. I don’t like to show a lot of skin, but if I do show skin, it’s likely to be my back and shoulders, rather than my legs. We spent over an hour getting ready. We made up our faces, Nat did my hair, and I ended up wearing one of my own dresses. I look over at Nat and my inner self sighs in jealousy. She always was the fox of the family.
Take what she’s wearing right now: a simple cut, bright mustard-yellow dress hitting high up on her thighs with tan heels. That’s it. Her now brown hair is worn straight with minimal makeup as she glosses her lips and smiles at me. I smile back, but there’s a shitload of envy in that smile.
My Grecian-style, white floor-length dress is twisted at the shoulders, and although simple, is one of my favorite dresses. I’ve worn it a heap of times, and when I find a new place to go, it’s always the first thing I go for. This is for a number of reasons. Firstly, it’s comfortable. Secondly, it’s flattering to my curvy body. Thirdly, it’s quaint and charming. All I have to do is slip on a pair of flat gold sandals, add a few big gold bangles, and top it off with a pair of dangly earrings. I wanted to leave my hair up, but Nat wasn’t having it. She made me wear it down, gently adding loose curls in my already wavy hair.
She dusted my cheeks with gold shimmer, lined my eyes, and put a crap-ton of mascara on me. I don’t know how she did it, but I sort of look ethereal, like a goddess…in a very human kind of way. Either way, I feel good going out tonight. I want to look my best. After all, I’m on the prowl. Max can eat a dick.
Ash comes in without knocking. I mean, why would he knock while breaking in through the back sliding door? He just strides on in like he owns the place. Might have something to do with the fact he bought the apartment building last year. He jerks his chin at me and states, “Nice.” Then he spots his wife. His eyes glaze over at the sight of Nat’s ass as she checks herself in the mirror. She spots him in the reflection and winks at him. He mutters, “Nicer.”
I’m offended. Well, no, I’m not. Mock-offended, really. I scoff and throw one of my many stuffed toys at his head. “Thanks, bonehead.”
He sheepishly rubs at the back of his neck. “You look hot too. In a sisterly way.” We both stiffen and recoil at the off-key statement. He points a finger at me. “Don’t repeat that. That was sick.” Closing my eyes, my body shakes in silent laughter. For a man who looks like he’s the epitome of cool, Ash is just…not.
Nat graces us with her presence. “Ready to go, kids?” She smacks a kiss on Ash’s cheek, leaving behind a glossy mess. He doesn’t even wipe it away, just snags her around the waist and pulls her close. In a dance they choreographed long ago, she comes willingly, moving to his front. He bands both arms around her middle, resting his chin on her head. This pose they’re in, I can’t remember seeing anything that looked more natural in the world. This pose…it’s just them. I love it. It makes me happy.