“Yeah,” Hector said. “I’m thinkin’ arson is probably a violation of his bond.”
I was no longer listening. A thin film of red had descended over my eyes and there was a buzzing in my ears.
My sagging body went tight and I put my hand on Hector’s stomach, pulled slightly away and looked up at him.
“Why didn’t you say anything?”
Hector’s chin dipped and his eyes came to mine.
“Parceling out the bad news, mamita,” he said softly. “You can only take so much at once.”
I blinked at him and then took in both Hector and Detective Marker.
“Let me get this straight,” I said, my voice trembling, something strange happening to me.
It was not my weird, warm, happy glow (not even f**king close).
It was not that hot, hard, painful knot in my chest.
It was something else altogether.
When I had both their attention, I kept talking. “First, for weeks, all the f**king Balduccis call me, stop by the gallery only when I’m alone, show up at my apartment day and night, doing crazy shit, saying crazy things and freaking me out. Then Ricky f**king Balducci breaks in, beats me up and rapes me. Then Harvey f**king Balducci assaults me and tries to kidnap me. Then Marty f**king Balducci threatens me over the phone and calls me the c-word, twice. Now, Donny f**king Balducci has burned down my gallery?”
I was shouting, people were looking at me and I didn’t care.
“You have got to be shitting me!” I yelled.
Hector got in my line of sight.
“Mamita, calm down,” he muttered.
I looked up at him and grabbed onto his tee, fisting it in my fingers and giving him a shake (well, trying to, but he didn’t move, just his tee did).
“You be calm! I’m pissed right, the f**k, off!” I screamed.
“This is gonna end, soon, Sadie, trust me.”
“Yeah, it’s going to end soon. I’m gonna hunt those motherfuckers down and –”
Hector’s hand came over my mouth and I finished my shouted threat so it sounded like, “Kff thff.”
Hector shuffled me back, arm still tight around my neck, hand over my mouth until we were away from Detective Marker and everyone.
Then his head came close. “Mamita, he knows you’re emotional and don’t mean it. Still, not good to threaten homicide in front of a cop.”
I just glared at him over his hand on my mouth.
“You in control?” he asked.
“No!” I said under his hand but it came out, “Nff!”
His body started to shake and I knew he was laughing.
My head prepared to explode.
Now, really, seriously, there was nothing f**king funny about this.
“This is not f**king funny,” I said under his hand but, again, it came out, “Thff if nf ffing ffny.”
I knew he was about to burst out laughing which would mean I’d have to kill him right in front of Detective Marker (or not kill him because I liked him but at least do him some bodily harm) when we heard, “We’re with them.”
Hector and my heads turned to the side and we saw Ralphie and Buddy with YoYo on a leash trying to get by a uniformed officer.
Hector dropped his arms, letting me go and called, “Joe, it’s all right.”
“Joe” looked at Hector, nodded and stepped aside. Ralphie and Buddy forged through, both of them walking slowly, their heads turned to the side staring at Art. YoYo strained at her lead, tongue lolling, bugged out eyes on me and Ralphie let her go. She scampered across the space; I leaned down and picked her up. She decided she needed to bathe my neck and jaw with her tongue so this was what she did, squiggling in my arms, all happy puppy.
“Stop,” Hector suddenly clipped at the pug, YoYo went still immediately and stared at him.
At his tone, so did I.
“She’s just happy to see me,” I explained to Hector.
“Only tongue on your neck is mine,” he returned.
My eyes bugged out as far as YoYo’s.
“You’re jealous of a dog?”
“Fuck no,” he answered, staring at me like I had a screw loose. “But I might have a mind to put my mouth on you and I don’t want to do it after a dog.”
Well.
Had to admit, he had a point.
And it was an interesting point.
And the thought of his mouth on me made me forget all about the crazy, mean, f**king, Balduccis.
Ralphie and Buddy made it to us and they gave chin lifts to Hector, (Ralphie’s came with a, “Hey, Double H”) and hugs and cheek kisses to me (Ralphie’s hug was tighter than normal, longer and after, he looked into my eyes until I smiled at him, only then did he move away).
“Lisette is gonna freak. She’d been working on that collection for over a year,” Ralphie said, his eyes now on the blackened building and my thoughts went right back to the crazy, mean, f**king Balduccis.
“Hector said it was Donny Balducci,” I informed them and, in unison, they looked at me. “I know. But you aren’t allowed to threaten his life, not in front of the police, or so Hector says.”
“Can I threaten to beat the crap out of him?” Buddy asked.
I looked at Hector to assess his response to this.
He was fighting a grin but he shook his head at me.
“Probably not,” I told Buddy.
“Well!” Ralphie cried (loudly). “Life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. We’re insured against loss of income, this means vacation. This means shopping. This means trips to the spa. This means learning how to make that complicated lemon soufflé.”
“You don’t cook,” Buddy cut in.
“Well, I’m gonna learn,” Ralphie shot back. “And that means Sur La Table, Cherry Creek Mall, after breakfast. Maybe Williams Sonoma. I’m calling the Rock Chicks. I’m thinking Mercury Café.” He turned to me. “You call Lisette and after I’m done calling Daisy, I’ll call the insurance people. We eat then we’re shopping for kitchen implements.”
“We don’t need any kitchen implements,” Buddy cut in again.
“One always needs kitchen implements,” Ralphie returned.
“No shopping and no breakfast with the Rock Chicks. Unless I can get a man on Sadie, she’s staying at the offices today,” Hector entered the conversation.
“That’s all right, Double H, I’m on the case,” Ralphie assured him.
Hector’s face went a weird mixture of hard and soft and I realized why when he started speaking in a voice that was the same as his face.