“I would like to be your friend. If that's all right.”
Clay looked at me strangely. I couldn't read his expression at all and he stood quietly for a moment, studying me. “Yeah. That would be cool.” He said after a few minutes. I smiled tentatively at him and he returned my smile with one of his own.
After following him around the back of the store for another fifteen minutes, engaging in casual chit chat, I finally got up the nerve to ask him the question I really wanted answered. “So when do you get off work? Do you want to go grab a cup of coffee or something?” I braced myself for his rejection. I was being really ballsy today.
Clayton looked up at the clock on the wall. “Actually I'm not technically working today. I just came in to help Tilly with stocking the shelves.” Clay indicated the twenty something girl who manned the cash register. The girl looked up when she heard her name. She was pretty, in that hippie sort of way, with long red hair and a colorful gypsy skirt.
I tried not to get eaten alive with jealousy when she gave Clay a full toothed smile that clearly said she liked him saying her name. “Tilly, I'm gonna take off now. You cool?” He asked, walking behind her to grab his jacket. Tilly flicked her hair over her shoulder and straightened her loose blouse that was covered in tiny bells. “Sure, Clay. You going to be in tomorrow?” She asked with barely concealed hope in her voice. Clayton bestowed a beautiful smile on her and the jealousy raged wildly in my stomach. I wanted that smile directed at me, damn it!
“Nope, I'm off until Tuesday.” Tilly's smile fell. “Oh, well I guess I'll see you next week.” She said with disappointment. She finally looked at me and I could see jealousy flash in her eyes when she realized Clayton was leaving with me. Take that bitch! I thought unkindly. Wow, where did this harpy come from? I was becoming a jealous shrew and he wasn't even my boyfriend.
Clay gave Tilly a final wave and ushered me through the door of the shop. Once we were outside, I took off my fleece and tied it around my waist. The sun had come out and it had warmed up since I had been inside. We stood on the sidewalk looking at each other. “So, coffee?” Clay asked. I nodded. “Yeah, let's do that. There's a great place down the street. They have the best biscotti.” I suggested. Clay rubbed his stomach. “Mmmm. Biscotti. My favorite.” He licked his lips and I suppressed a groan. This guy was going to kill me.
As we walked down the sidewalk, not saying much, my heart beat a mile a minute and my palms were sweaty. I discretely wiped them on my blue jeans. Clayton made me feel nervous and giddy all at once. I liked it.
When we got to the coffee shop we both headed for the back. It was dimly lit with an overstuffed couch, and it felt cozy and intimate. “What would you like?” I asked him. Clay shook his head. “No way, I'll get this. You just grab us a seat.” I thrilled at his words. He was buying me coffee! It almost felt like a date.
I was proud of how steady my voice was when I gave him my usual order of a grande mocha latte with extra whipped cream and a slice of vanilla biscotti. I watched Clay walk to the counter and couldn't take my eyes away from his massive shoulders. He really was a big guy. He could easily have been mistaken for a football player or something. I also noticed the way others watched him, as though they were just as aware of how special he was. His shoulders were less slouched today and he was carrying himself with a bit more confidence than I saw at school.
He returned a short time later with my order. “I see you took my word on the biscotti.” I said, indicating his plate with three pieces. Clay smiled shyly. “Yeah, I'm a little hungry.” He sat beside me on the couch and carefully sipped his own drink. I picked up my mocha and took a drink, careful to make sure my lips were free of whipped cream when I was done.
Our silence was becoming more companionable than before. There was still that little bit of awkwardness laced through it, but it was less noticeable. “So what do you think of Jackson so far? Does it live up to all of your high school fantasies?” I asked as I swirled my biscotti into my coffee.
Clay gave an adorable snort and put down his mug, reaching for his own biscotti. “I'm still waiting for the flash mobs, but other than that it has been just fine.” He replied. I sipped my coffee again, taking time to watch him hold his food with long, careful fingers.
“Fine? That's it? No stronger adjectives to use?” I asked. Clay met my eyes and I was once again taken aback by how dark they were. So brown they were almost black. He shrugged. “All schools are really the same. This one is no better or worse than the others I've been to.”
His answers always gave just enough information to tantalize, yet never actually revealed anything. I was a little hesitant to broach any subject that he deemed too personal after being abruptly shut down before. But I had told him I wanted to be his friend. He came here with me, right? So that showed he wanted to be my friend too, I thought. And friends got to know each other. That was the whole point of friendship. So, without giving myself time to ruminate more, I plunged right in.
“So you live with your Aunt Ruby. Do you um...like living with her? What's she like?” I waited for his anger and was relieved when none came. “You just don't give up do you? We can't just sit here and talk about the weather?” He asked lightly. I shook my head. “Nope, I want to know about you. That's what friends do.” “And we're friends?” He asked me. His eyes seemed to be asking something else, but I didn't know what. So I nodded. “I'd like to be anyway.” I said. Clay smiled. “Friends then.” I smiled back. “So your aunt?” I prompted.
“Yes, my aunt. Well Ruby is pretty awesome. She's my mom's older sister and they don't exactly get along. Life style differences and all that. Mom doesn't approve of Ruby's partner, Lisa.” “Ahh.” I said knowingly. Clay dunked his biscotti in the hot drink and nibbled. “But Ruby has always been there for me. She's always helped out when I needed her. So I'm thankful she let me come stay with her and Lisa. It was a life saver really.” The way he spoke about his aunt made it clear how much he loved her. My heart clenched at the raw vulnerability I heard.
“She sounds like an amazing person.” I told him quietly, not wanting to mess with the mood of intimacy that had wound around us. Clay shook himself slightly, as if realizing how much he was actually revealing. “Yeah, she's pretty fantastic.” He said wistfully. “And Lisa is a hoot. She's this hardcore biker chick and she could definitely kick my ass if I got out of line.” He laughed. I laughed with him, picturing his aunt's girlfriend, the biker lady.