“I hate to hear it too. I’m just . . . I’m not the person I was a few weeks ago.”
He looks unconvinced as he sits back in his chair. “Care to explain? I’m having a hard time accepting this, Neely.”
I lug in a breath of stale, fast-food-scented air. “I feel as passionately as I ever have about empowering girls and giving women a voice in a field where they oftentimes go unnoticed. That hasn’t changed.”
“Then what has? Neely, quite frankly, you’re turning down something most people work their whole lives for. You’ve done that—worked for this. And now you’re giving it up? I don’t understand.”
“I know, and I’m sorry to let you down. I’ve always felt there was more out there for me, that if I kept pushing, I would wake up one morning and find it. But really, I think what I was looking for was inside me all along.”
Aerial’s speech comes swirling back, bringing with it another round of tears.
Dabbing at my eyes, I shrug. “I don’t need a worldwide platform to make a difference. I don’t need a title to validate who I am or what I believe.” I look out the floor-to-ceiling windows and beyond the skyscrapers filling the sky. “And I don’t need a big old city to shield me from my fears.”
I think he’s going to be angry. I straighten my shoulders and wait for him to tell me not to use him for a reference when I come to my senses. I prepare for him to tell me I’m wasting the biggest chance of my life.
Instead, he smiles. “You know, sometimes the best changes happen at the grassroots level.”
I pass a hot swallow down my throat. “I didn’t expect you to say that.”
He grabs a tissue from the box on his desk and dabs it on the back of his neck. “If you want this job, Neely, I want you to have it. But I’ll say I’m almost relieved you don’t.”
“Why?”
“Look at me,” he scoffs. “My wife left me twenty years ago and took our son with her. I see him when he’s in town on work, maybe twice a year. I missed being with my parents when they were on their last legs. I don’t even know what fresh air smells like anymore.”
“Why do you do it then?”
“Same reasons you wanted to. I just didn’t wise up soon enough. You did.” He gets to his feet and shoves his glasses back on his nose. “You have an excellent gut for doing the right thing. Your instincts are spot-on. Always trust them. It’ll get you further than anything else in your life.”
I stand, too, and shrug. “Now what?”
“It looks to me like you need to catch a flight.”
The magnitude of the situation slams against me. I almost drop my suitcase. “I do.”
“Why aren’t you skipping out of here, then?”
“What if he doesn’t take me back?” I look at him and he laughs. “I’m not kidding, Frank. What if he hates me?”
“He won’t.”
The anger in Dane’s eyes the last time I saw him flickers through my mind. My heart squeezes so hard I’m afraid it’s going to stop pumping. “I don’t know. He’s pretty mad at me.”
“I’d be mad, too, if you were my girl and you left me for a stupid job in New York. But let me tell you something about men.”
“Okay,” I say as we head to the door.
“Men get angry and loud and bristle because we don’t know how to be vulnerable. We’re so afraid of losing position and getting hurt that we try to make ourselves seem invincible, even if it’s only ourselves we’re kidding.” He pulls the door open. “Go to him, Neely. Be honest. Lay it out there, and I promise you, he’ll take you back.”
“I hope so, Frank.” I step into the lobby and almost fall on my face.
CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO
DANE
It all happens in slow motion. One second, I’m trying to ignore the receptionist’s comments about how “sweet” my accent is. The next, the door is opening.
Every cell in my body tunes to the doorway where a balding man who looks like he’s on the verge of a heart attack stands. He’s talking to someone I can’t see. I don’t have to see her, though, to know it is Neely.
I’m on the edge of my seat, eyes glued to the doorway. My mouth goes dry as I try to remember the little speech I prepped on the plane a few hours ago. I went over it time and time again. Now, when I need it, it evades me.
Her voice is soft as it filters into the lobby. I stumble to my feet, running my hands down the pants I wore last night as I wait for her to come into view.
It takes far too long to happen, but when it does, it happens fast.
She steps through the doorway, looking at Mr. Heart Attack. She says something I can’t hear. Finally, she turns toward me.
The smile falters on her lips as her gaze finds mine like it always does. I take a step toward her and she trips. Catching herself on the edge of the receptionist’s desk, she blows out a breath.
And then whips her head to me.
“Neely.” I gulp, coming to her side. “Just hear me out.”
I can’t read the look on her face. It’s a mixture of fear and embarrassment and more sadness than I care to admit.
Please, God, let this work out. I’ll never make her feel this way again.
“Dane—”
“No,” I say, shaking my head. “I came all this way with all these things to say. And I can’t even remember them all, and I left my notes on the plane.” I scratch my head, trying to get myself together quickly before she can tell me no. “I can’t do this again. I can’t. Everything is wrong now that you’re gone.”
“Dane—”
“And I realize I might be embarrassing you right now in front of your boss and coworkers, and I hope they will know this is a reflection of me and not of you. I’m the crazy one. Crazy about you.”
“Oh my gosh.” The receptionist clutches her chest. “I can’t even with this.”
Neely’s eyes water, the lights above reflecting off her eyes. I feel wetness gathering at the corners of mine too. As hard as it is to stay calm, I have to. This is my one chance to fix every mistake I’ve ever made. My one shot at getting every piece of my life back together.
“I never should’ve let you leave. I should’ve manned up and told you flat out how I feel. Maybe it wouldn’t have changed things because I know who you are. I know how much this job means to you.”
“Dane,” she says. “Listen to me.”
“Just let me finish. Please,” I beg. “I want you to be happy and to get everything you want out of life. But there has to be a way to do that with me and Mia. I know you love us, Neely. I know you love us as much as we love you.”
I swear Mr. Heart Attack mumbles something along the lines of “I told you,” but I let it go.
Taking a step toward Neely, ignoring the audience we’re beginning to attract, I take her hand. “I’m sorry for being a dick when you told me you were leaving.”
“Will you listen to me?” she asks. She sniffles back a laugh, squeezing my hand.
“No. This is my moment.” I bite my lip to keep from saying anything else for a moment because if I do, I know I’ll cry like a pussy. “Life isn’t about playing it safe or playing the odds. If I listened to either of them, I’d be home right now. But an old man came by the house late last night and asked what I was going to do about you leaving. I had flights pulled up but hadn’t pulled the trigger. Mia had gone to bed, and Haley was on the couch.” I look up at the spectators. “She’s the nanny, just clarifying.”
The lobby rolls with laughter from the five or six people watching. Neely sets her briefcase down and takes my other hand in hers.
I don’t want to think this might be working, but it damn sure feels like it. My heart pounds in my chest as I go in for the kill.
“Dad said something smart for once,” I say. “He said life is not about what happens to you, but how you react to it. My reaction to you leaving is to come and get you because I don’t see another way to live without you by my side. And I know a little girl who thinks the world of you, and I’d be honored if you’d be a part of her life too.”
“Just marry him,” the receptionist cries. “If you don’t, I will.”
Neely flashes her a look to stay put before turning back to me. “Can I talk now?”
“Depends on what you’re going to say.”
She searches my eyes for a moment. I remain as unguarded as I can, completely opening myself up to her inspection.
“I love you, Dane.”
“Yes!” The receptionist gets to her feet and claps.
“I like your enthusiasm,” I tell her.
Neely laughs, blinking back tears. “I love you. I love Mia. And I love that you’re here.”
“I had to come. It was a long time coming.” I lean forward and press a kiss against her lips. She wraps her arms around my neck and kisses me back like she means it.
For the first time in my entire life, my world feels like it’s complete. There’s a warmth rising from the center of my chest, and I can’t fight it if I try.
Despite being in New York, having Mia so far away, being in the reception area of a company that was my mortal enemy until a few moments ago, everything is right in this moment. In this one spot of time, my world is perfect.