“Mwahahaha,” I tell him, grinning broadly.
He doesn’t look even a little bit amused, and he abandons me with Gage, who is already dragging me against his hard body, while the other two follow Jude to where everyone is gathering.
“Lamar said he found something. We’re meeting up with him once we figure out what’s going on here,” Gage tells me as he tugs down one of my purple gloves, inspecting the minor damage to my arms.
“I’m healing rapidly. Please don’t be mad. A girl’s gotta do—”
“We’ll talk about it later,” he grumbles, pressing his forehead to the crown of my head as he blows a warm breath of exhaustion into my hair. “I liked it better when you were only turning whole long enough to get fucked,” he confesses.
I pat his hand, leaning my head back on his shoulder, relishing this semi-sweet moment of affection. Though, they’ve all gotten noticeably more affectionate.
I think Jude’s incident brought us all closer, even though I didn’t start noticing it until after he woke up. My attention was solely on him for those horrifying hours, worrying about pain…that he apparently wasn’t feeling.
I can’t go through that fear ever again.
Yet, I can’t defeat Jahl without my horsemen, because they represent a huge chunk of power The Apocalypse needs to be considered whole. Hence the reason they’re The Four Horsemen of The Apocalypse.
“You must be thinking too hard, because there’s literally smoke pluming from your ears right now,” Gage states in a somewhat amused/concerned tone.
I dart a look at the reflective black stone next to us, and my eyes widen when I see he’s not joking.
“I feel like that should be embarrassing,” I note. “Tell me what you figure out. I’m going ahead to meet up with Lamar.”
I go phantom and zap out before he can argue, mostly because I’m still irked by the almost-love confession I feel robbed of and need some bestie time with Lamar before the guys come in with their serious faces and demanding agendas.
Lamar is in the room, oblivious to me, even though he rubs the back of his neck and looks around. Sometimes he senses me, and sometimes he’s not sure if he senses me or not.
He returns his attention to the stack of open books on the table, and he reads over them very carefully, lips moving silently to the foreign languages.
I take a seat right next to him before I abruptly appear, and he yelps as he leaps back and falls out of his chair. I smile down at him as he makes an indignant sound and hops to his feet, dusting his clothes off, and returns his ass to his chair.
“I hate it when you do that,” he says in a dry tone.
“I know. So, listen. Jude almost did the I-love-you-soul-blending thing—”
“You don’t have a soul. You have a destructive core,” he reminds me, brow furrowing as he seems to strain his attention to say that much, while he reads very eagerly.
I glance at the hieroglyphics that look like a lot of bird and sun symbol gibberish to me.
“Well, my destructive core feels soothed by their dark souls and there’s an intimate, internal exchange—”
“Shhhh,” he hisses, his attention solely on the books.
“Aren’t you supposed to be my biggest fan or something?” I ask as I arch an unimpressed eyebrow at him.
“Right now, I think I’m your biggest source of information,” he tells me as he slides the book in front of me. “This is one of your journals, and though the language is ancient and dead, the pages prove it’s one of your most recent writings. I found it hidden in…never mind. Just read.”
I stare at him like he’s an idiot.
He blinks at me like he’s just realized he’s an idiot.
“Oh, right. Your languages are limited—”
“Just read it to me, Lamar,” I groan, not needing a reminder that I’m so much less amazing than the old me.
He clears his throat and starts running his finger along the lines from right to left.
“Roughly translated to make sense in English, it says, ‘If the second trigger is ignited, it’ll be useless in combat with Jahl. There will be an implosion within the confines of the Pure Branch—”
“The what?” I ask, confused.
“The Pure Branch is the name of the cage that holds Jahl. Some say it was created by the creator…if you know what I mean,” he tells me in a conspiratorial whisper, as though there’s a name that can’t be so much as muttered down here.
I nod like it makes perfect sense, and prompt him to continue.
“Jahl can’t be destroyed by one more pure than impure—”
“What does that mean?” I ask when he reads that line like it’s paramount above all other information.
He looks me directly in the eyes. “It means no pure champion ever stood a chance, and only a being as tainted and untainted as yourself could ever hope to wage a war and glimpse a victory. We’ve theorized this, but this is just more proof that we’re right.”
“That sounded incredibly drawn out. So in other words, they should have designed their champion a little more like me,” I state as I glance down, wishing I could read this shit myself.
“Only without a destruction sequence,” he says as though that’s his only argument on the matter. “If one such as you had wielded two weapons—good and evil—then possibly…”
He grows quiet, reading ahead without sharing with those of us who can’t read gibberish.
“What does it say?” I ask, annoyed by this point.
I came for girl talk, and instead, I get Jahl talk.
“They came to the conclusion too late, which you already know. The most important part is that you knew it long before they did. Long before the champion even went against Jahl, according to this dating here,” he says, pointing at some sketchy marks that make no sense. “You studied it a lot more intensively than they seem to realize, because you were preparing yourself for this decision.”
“I was?” I ask, leaning forward. “It seems like I already know that,” I add as I sit back. “Have we talked about this already?”
“I honestly don’t know. The information has been overwhelming, even for me. I’ve been let in on critical, high-level things so often lately that it’s staggering to try to keep up with all of it,” he confesses, sounding as exhausted as I feel. “There’s just not enough time in the short days before this battle has to conclude, and it’s starting to take its toll on me.”
Lamar’s words grow quieter toward the end once he becomes absorbed by the very distracting journal entry. I’m happy I don’t have to remind him I’m sitting here before he starts sharing what he’s learned again.
“The second trigger is mentioned a lot in these journals. Manella said Lucifer doesn’t even know how to activate it or where you put it inside you. It was something he helped you design for yourself, with a reserve of power, but I half wonder if you didn’t use it to reset yourself and come back stronger. You’d have had to give up something very powerful, and that’s the only thing I can think of that could make up for all you’ve gained,” he tells me.
“My purple flame came at the price of avoiding flipping the trigger that will officially end the weapon and cost me my one shot at living?” I ask incredulously.
That doesn’t sound like something the old me would do just to have hotter fire.
“Purple fire?” He stops and looks over at me in confusion, so I let a small orb of fire form in my hand.
His eyes widen and he leans way back.
“It’s really purple. And it’s even hotter than it was. Did you already level up again?” he asks in stunned disbelief.
“I’m on a time crunch. Drastic measures are required. Seriously, though, what’s the point in being hotter if I can’t destroy him without risking destroying—”
“If you pull your main trigger, it won’t be enough unless you weaken Jahl substantially first,” he says, eyes flicking to mine. “Lucifer isn’t wrong about that. Everything I’ve read supports his many objections and arguments. All of his arguments. Manella has filled me in on every counterstrike Lucifer will have against this course of action.”
“So it really is pointless to fight Jahl?” I ask, sitting back and feeling oddly disappointed.
He slants his gaze toward me, smirking.
“It was. Unless you really did give up that second trigger for a lot more power so you could defeat him without blowing up yourself and your boys inside the Pure Branch. The secondary trigger was pointless, due to the location where the fight has to take place. If he’s out of that cage, it’s useless to fight him no matter how powerful you get. It really will be the end of all.”
“So…I traded the secondary trigger for pretty fire? That still doesn’t make much sense.”
“Your fire, Paca, can burn hotter than hellfire, the eternal flame, and purifying fire all combined if I fear the heat from such a small bit. It’s possible you intended to burn away Jahl’s impurities until it ceases to exist. But it’ll have to be after you’ve weakened it. Jahl is a quickly evolving manifestation that learns and adapts too easily because it has single-minded goals. Strike too soon, and it could find a way to defend itself.”