I pushed closer and tensed my fingers into the tight muscle of his neck.
“You’re not good. You’re on edge. You’ve been up four times, did four checks, came back four times because it was all fine because it’s all fine. So you need to relax.”
“I’m relaxed, Jussy. Now you relax and get back to sleep.”
I dug the pads of my fingers deeper into the taut muscle of his neck, following it down to where it met his shoulder.
“You’re wound tight, Deke. I can feel it. That is not relaxed.”
“Right. Then I’ll relax when this night is over,” he finally admitted.
God, he freaking liked me.
I did let that give me a small smile, pushing closer, tipping my head back and gliding my hand back up his neck, sifting my fingers into his hair.
He had it tied up, like he always did. I’d never seen it down. Not in sleep, after sleep, even after a shower it was wet, twisted up and tied.
I wanted to see it down.
I put pressure on his head and tipped mine back. I knew unless he allowed it I couldn’t force his down.
But he allowed it.
Because he was Deke. He’d give me anything.
So.
Totally.
Liked me.
“It’s gonna be okay,” I whispered. “You know that. You were the one who laid that out.”
“I do know it. And in the morning when I’m proved right, I’ll be good.”
I stared at his shadowed face, something that was relatively easy to do in the moonlight filtering through the trees outside and my wall of windows.
I should just close my eyes and go to sleep. If he was on edge, nothing I could do would probably change that.
Except maybe one thing.
Taking his mind off it.
Something I was going to attempt to do in my bed with his big body, now in faded dark-blue fleece cut-off shorts and nothing else, pressed close to mine, (I couldn’t know for sure about that “nothing else” but there was no indication, and I’d looked, that he also had on underwear).
I should wait, at least until tomorrow, when we were past this part of my situation and it was definitely time to talk about what had changed between us.
Smelling him, feeling his heat, knowing he was uneasy because of me, I didn’t want to wait.
So I didn’t.
I lifted up and, holding my breath, a knot that was part nerves, part something else in my belly, for the first time ever, I touched lips with Deke.
At that mere contact, I felt an electric charge tingle against my lips the likes I’d never felt in my life.
His body went completely still.
I didn’t know what that reaction meant; it could be rejection or the opposite.
But in my head I heard that faraway roar of Where’s Justice Lonesome? followed closely with the rumbled murmurings of Christ almighty. Christ almighty, baby.
He liked me.
And when two consenting adults liked each other, shit happened.
I went back in.
A lip brush then a whispered, “Relax, Deke.”
His hand resting on my hip slid up to my waist and squeezed.
It did not push me away. It just squeezed.
“Jussy,” he muttered. “Now’s not—”
I went in for another lip brush, another whisper of, “Relax, honey,” and then I went for it and slid my tongue out, gliding the tip along the crease of his lips.
God, he tasted yummy.
I had just enough time to have that thought before I drew in a soft breath when I suddenly found myself on my back, Deke’s weight on me, all of his lower half pressing me into the bed.
“Jussy, don’t,” he growled, his words contradicting our new position. “Now’s not the time.”
Now was totally the time. If I didn’t feel that “now was the time” gathering between my legs (which I did), I could feel that indication hardening on my thigh.
I moved both my hands to his neck, its back, fingers up in his hair and I used those hands and his stiffness to pull me up and I put my mouth back to his.
“Now’s a great time,” I said softly. “You’ve been taking care of me. It’s my turn to take care of you.”
“Jus—”
“Shush,” I whispered.
“Jussy—”
I cut off whatever he was going to say by sliding my tongue in his mouth and touching it to his.
His head jerked back.
My body went solid.
He didn’t move.
I held on to his neck and stared at him staring down at me.
Okay, maybe I shouldn’t have pushed it. Maybe now wasn’t the time.
Hell, maybe I was even wrong about the whole thing. Maybe Deke was that guy who went the extra mile to look out for his friends. And maybe the evidence that was growing hard against my thigh wasn’t evidence of what I thought it was, but just that I was a girl, he was a guy, we were in bed in the dead of night and that was the natural order of things.
I started to feel weird, scared, embarrassment creeping in, and I was about to let him go when it happened.
Thunder rolled in my bedroom, feeling like it was emanating from his stomach, through his chest, his lips, swelling in the room, over my skin, straight between my legs.
Then he shifted one of his hands that were in the bed at my sides, his weight up on his forearms, so it was wrapped around the back of my neck and his mouth slammed down on mine.
I opened my lips and his tongue thrust inside.
Oh God, yes, fuck yes.
He tasted yummy.
Another fierce growl released from Deke, sinking down my throat as he slanted his head and took the kiss deeper.
Okay.
Yes.
Okay.
Damn.
The man could kiss.
I slid one arm around his shoulders, the other hand went up and into his hair. I yanked out the holder and it tumbled down, through my fingers, thick and sleek.