It hadn’t. He’d basically told her to go fuck herself.
The worst part was, she deserved his animosity.
For someone who’d once been paid to help other people get their lives on track, she sure was terrible at keeping her own in order.
She slid her hand into the pocket of her jeans and pulled out her phone. She could call him. Apologize. Accept his proposal. Move in with him. Tell him that she didn’t only want his body, she wanted his heart. His soul. She wanted all of him.
She ended up dialing Kennedy instead of Adam. She and Kennedy had been inseparable since birth—actually their bond had started before birth. No one knew her better than her twin. If anyone would be able to explain to Madison why she had behaved like such a raving idiot, Kennedy could. And Madison knew her sister wouldn’t hold back to spare her feelings.
Madison held her smart phone against her ear and massaged the tense spot between her eyebrows as she waited for the call to connect. She hoped her sister wasn’t with a patient. She really needed to talk to someone who would talk back to her.
“Uh, how did you find a spare minute to call me?” Kennedy answered. “Aren’t you too busy getting laid to have time for the likes of me?”
Just hearing Kennedy’s teasing voice made Madison’s eyes fill with tears.
“I messed up,” Madison said, her voice catching. The huge knot in her throat made it difficult to breathe, much less speak.
“What’s wrong? You sound upset, and when you’re upset, I’m upset.”
“Adam asked me to marry him.”
There was silence on the other end for a long moment. “And?” Kennedy drew out the word.
“And I didn’t say yes.”
Another pause. “Did you say no?”
“I didn’t say no either. Not exactly. I told him we needed to talk about it, and he freaked out. And then we made up and he asked me to move in with him, and I freaked out again. Then I think I broke up with him. I’m not sure. I’m not sure about anything right now. I left, but I’m not sure I meant to leave. I didn’t want to leave, but it seemed like the only option at the time because I wasn’t thinking clearly and he wasn’t listening properly. What am I doing, Kennedy? I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing.” She dashed away her foolish tears. The airport was not the place to have an emotional breakdown. People were starting to stare.
“Where are you, honey?”
“I’m at the airport trying to get on an earlier flight.” She hoped a standby seat became available soon so she wouldn’t have to hang around the airport all day. Her ticketed flight wasn’t until the next day, so the odds weren’t looking good for her.
“Good. I’ll help you sort things out when you get here. What time does your flight land? I’ll make sure I’m home when you arrive.”
“Don’t cancel appointments or anything; I’ll be okay.”
“What time, Madison?”
“Half past three, I think. They said my best chance is the two o’clock flight.” She wiped at a few stray tears that insisted on falling. She could always count on her sister to be there for her. “I’m sure I made a huge mistake by leaving, Kennedy, but I didn’t know what to do. I panicked.”
“You did the right thing. He shouldn’t have freaked out because you told him you needed to talk about something as monumental as marriage. I didn’t even know marriage was on his agenda.”
One of the main issues was that Adam didn’t see marriage as monumental. He seemed to think it was something to do on a whim. Madison sniffed her nose, and dug through her purse for a tissue. “Neither did I. It was a complete shock. I still can’t believe he asked. But I messed up with him so bad. I’m not sure he’ll ever forgive me.”
“You didn’t mess up, he did. And he’s obviously more serious about you than you are about him.”
Madison closed her eyes and shook her head. “But he’s not. I should have just said yes. I don’t know why I didn’t. He means everything to me. I love him. I want to marry him. I do. I just . . . I’m confused. Or . . . I don’t know. Maybe I’m delirious. I did get bitten by a bunch of mosquitoes. Isn’t delirium one of the symptoms of Ebola?”
“You don’t have Ebola, Madison. It isn’t even transmitted by mosquitoes.”
“I know. That was a joke.” Apparently not a very good one.
“In all seriousness, Madi, something held you back. Some kernel of reason prevented you from accepting his proposal.”
“But I love him. I love him so much, Kennedy.”
“Love isn’t all there is to being this man’s wife. You know marrying him is going to be a huge hairy deal. He’s a celebrity. He’s an addict.”
“Recovering addict.” Sometimes she hated how even kiltered her sister could be. She so rarely got worked up about anything. And Madison had once been the same way. She was glad Adam had shown her how to be passionate. She just wished that embracing that part of herself didn’t scare her so much.
Kennedy ignored her interruption. “Had you ever even discussed marriage with him before he popped the question?”
“No,” Madison said. “That’s why it completely threw me. We’re standing in this bayou joking about fish and alligators and mosquitoes and the next thing I know he’s on one knee proposing and . . .”
She could still picture him at her feet, staring up at her with absolute adoration, the ring he offered catching stray rays of sunshine. She took a deep breath.
“You should have seen the ring he tried to give me. It was gorgeous. And my heart wanted me to say yes, but I just froze up completely.” She blew her nose and tossed the tissue into a nearby garbage can.
“And you tried to talk to him about it?”
“Of course I did, but he’s hurt that I didn’t accept immediately. He seems to think that because I act on logic instead of pure blind emotion that I don’t love him.”
“He said that to you?”
Madison toyed with the plastic armrest of her chair. “Well, not exactly, but I could tell he was thinking it.”
“Maybe he needs a few days to think it over himself,” Kennedy said.
“But I’m afraid he’ll think I don’t love him. That I left him. Actually left him. For good. I think I need to go back immediately and make him listen to me. Make him see reason.”