You’ve gone too far to worry about sparing her feelings now.
“Because this isn’t happy news for you, Jess.”
Her mouth trembled and he watched as she fought to stop it. She inhaled. Exhaled. “But it will be happy news for them.”
Brandt nodded.
“Jesus. This is a nightmare. Just when I think it can’t get worse, it does. Just when I think Luke McKay can’t possibly hurt me any more than he already has, he does.”
He didn’t dispute it, which forced her to meet his gaze.
She paled further, if that were possible. “It gets worse, doesn’t it?”
“Afraid so. Look, Samantha has had a rough go of it. She’s young, a single parent with no one to turn to, so she’s made some mistakes.”
“What kind of mistakes?”
“She got a DUI when Landon was six months old. She managed mostly to stay on the straight and narrow…until two months ago.”
“What did she do?”
“Got a second DUI.”
Jessie’s mouth dropped open. “Are you joking?”
He shook his head.
“Is that why she contacted you? To bail her out of jail?”
“No. She contacted me after the arrest because she knew she’d be sent to jail. She moved away from the guy she’d shacked up with and moved back in with her aunt. But the aunt can’t take care of Landon. So she needs…”
“Oh no. Please tell me you didn’t volunteer to—”
“What choice do I have?” He stood and paced to the door and back. “If one of Landon’s blood relatives doesn’t take him, her aunt will turn the child over to Protective Services.”
“It sounds like the kid will be a helluva lot better off with a child protection agency than with her,”
Jessie snapped.
Brandt froze. “You don’t mean that.”
“Yes, I do. She’s a perfect example of why there are these types of agencies, Brandt. Let them deal with her and with the kid. They’re more qualified to make a rational decision about—”
“The only living link I’ll ever have to my dead brother? I’m just supposed to say, oh well, not my problem? Not care? He’s little more than a baby, Jess. None of this is his fault. Don’t you see that? I’m sorry, but I can’t walk away. I won’t.”
“Fine. You can’t. I get that. But I don’t understand what any of this has to do with me.”
Here was the moment of truth. He knelt in front of her. “Because I can’t do this by myself. I need your help.”
“No.”
“Just hear me out.”
“No. God. No. Stop. Brandt. Please. Just stop.”
The look on her face was killing him, but somehow he soldiered on. “It’s a temporary situation. Just a few months.”
“You can’t be serious. You really aren’t asking me to help you take care of my dead husband’s illegitimate child.”
“That’s exactly what I’m asking.”
“Oh God, I’m gonna be sick.” She shoved him aside so hard he fell on his ass and she raced to the kitchen sink.
Her retching sounds, mixed with her heartbreaking sobs, made his eyes burn and his throat tighten.
He was asking the impossible of her. He knew that. But he also knew that Jessie had the kindest soul and the purest heart of anyone he’d ever known. That’s why he hated how his brother had treated her. And it pissed him off that Luke still had the power to hurt her—to hurt both of them—from beyond the grave.
Brandt wasn’t a religious man, but maybe there was a reason this child had happened and a reason why Samantha had come to him for help. He had to believe this shitty situation would mean something good in the end. Because if he thought too hard about the cruelty of it, he’d go stark raving mad. Hell. He was almost there.
He picked himself up off the floor and went to her. Jessie didn’t shrink away when he wrapped his arms around her. She turned and burrowed into his chest, sobbing.
Brandt held her and let his tears fall along right with hers.
Finally, she whispered, “I can’t do it.”
“You don’t know that,” he soothed. “I’m only askin’ you to try.”
“How? By forcing me?”
He tipped her chin up. “I’d never force you. You know me better than that.”
Again, she looked away. Again, Brandt lifted her chin and studied her eyes. The misery was still there, but something else was too. Something that resembled anger. “What?”
“Why me, Brandt? Why am I the first person you thought of?”
Because you’re the most caring person I know.
“Is this some sort of punishment?”
Confused, he frowned. “Punishment? Why would you ask that?”
“Because I hurt you. Then you cut me out of your life completely. And you can deny it all you want-”
“I’m not denyin’ that you hurt me, Jessie. But I was the one outta line, not you. I was mad at myself, not at you.”
Jessie’s entire face held an expression of disbelief.
“So you think I’m usin’ this as an opportunity to get back at you? To hurt you?”
“That’s what I’m asking,” she said softly.
“Christ, just bringing the goddamn thing to your attention is hurting you. I can see that. You think I like the way you’re lookin’ at me right now? No. But I remember you looked at me the same way right after Luke died. I remember how we helped each other through it. One day at a time. How bein’ together somehow made it…bearable at times.” He closed his eyes against the pain in hers. “Do you remember the night you told me you wouldn’t have survived that first year if it hadn’t been for me? How you owed me and if I ever needed anything from you, all I had to do was ask? Well, Jess, right now, I’m askin’ you. I’m begging you. Please. I need you to help me do this.”
After a minute or so of hellish silence, she burrowed into him again. Her tears soaked his shirt. “I don’t know if I can do it. I need some time, Brandt.”
“I hate to say it, but that’s the one thing I can’t give you. I’m picking Landon up tomorrow.”
“And you’re just telling me now? This is going way too fast.”
“I hadn’t intended to spring this on you. But Samantha’s sentencing was moved up last week. She went to the women’s correctional facility in Lusk on Wednesday. Her aunt agreed to keep Landon only for a few days. If I don’t go get him tomorrow…”