“Yes, we’ve fucked.”
“Then you’re his woman. He doesn’t want to see your sweet ass in shit like that. Fuck me, I bet my own grandma wore better shit than that. If Whizz has sent you out with money, he wants you to do something different.” He moved away from the wall. Markus and Anthony were still asleep in the pushchairs, but they faced them. “Buy something sexy. Do you want Whizz?”
“I can pick out my own underwear.” This couldn’t get any more embarrassing. She didn’t even know Gash and he was giving her advice on what underwear to pick out.
“You’re looking at the shit that’s not sexy at all. You want Whizz, you want to keep him, step your game up. Pick the kind of underwear a man wants to remove with his teeth.” Gash kept staring at her, unnerving her with the intensity of his gaze.
“Why does this mean so much to you?” she asked. “You know who I am. The club I belonged to.”
“And I’ve heard about Whizz. You’ve changed him. He wants you, Lacey. If you want him, then start fighting to keep him. Once the brothers see what you mean to Whizz, they’ll back off. Besides, I didn’t realize you were a selfish bitch.”
“What? I’m not.”
“No? Then why are you taking all the credit for all the bad shit going on? Stop being selfish and see that the blame falls equally.”
He stepped back, giving her some space. Okay, Gash was a little different from all the other brothers she’d met. He didn’t blame her for all the problems happening in their life, but still, it didn’t stop her from being slightly frightened of him. The man was huge in every way possible.
She looked at the wall and thought about Whizz. He was the first man she truly wanted to keep. Dalton hadn’t been hers, and she’d not wanted him.
Reaching out, she stopped before she grabbed one of the bras. She wanted Whizz to look at her the way Lash did Angel, Zero did Prue, and Tiny did Eva. Lacey could stand there all day thinking about the looks the men shared with their women. She wanted Whizz to look at her and to know that when he got her alone, she was going to be screaming in pleasure within seconds. She wanted him to want her, not just want but to crave her. Above everything else, she wanted to feel like a woman just once in her life.
Moving away from the bland underwear she went in search of something sexy, something she wouldn’t dare wear before Whizz.
“That’s my girl,” Gash said.
Her cheeks had to be as red as Angel’s with the way Gash praised her. He didn’t take the piss, only encouraged her. His presence had nothing to do with helping her personally. Gash was clearly only helping out another brother, but his advice was oddly comforting. This was the first time she’d picked out anything beautiful to enhance her assets.
“You’ve got large tits, Lacey. Get something to show them off.”
The women who passed Gash looked disgusted by him. She saw the interest in some of the women’s eyes as well. Gash wasn’t every woman’s cup of tea, but he certainly made for an interesting shopping experience.
For the next hour she bought so many sets of bras and panties to tease and delight Whizz when she finally saw him. It was getting late, and hunger hit her hard.
“Come on,” Prue said. “I’m starving, and I can’t wait until we get home.”
They headed toward the food court and settled on the burger joint for their food. Lacey sat with Gash and the boys.
“You don’t need to be embarrassed by what you’ve bought,” he said.
“I’m not.” She tucked some hair behind her ear. She was a little embarrassed that it took a man to get her to buy something sexy.
“Do you care about Whizz?” The fun-loving man that was there when Angel and Prue were there disappeared.
“Yes.” She wasn’t going to lie. Gash scared her. Killer and Lash were supposed to be the men no one messed with. She heard both men could kill a man with their bare hands. From the look on Gash’s face, his demeanor, she knew he held a lot of secrets inside him, dangerous secrets. Five years in prison for rape and murder would do that to a man.
“Good. He’s been through a lot. I heard so have you.”
“I’ve survived.”
“The ink on your wrists isn’t a good enough indication that you’ve been surviving. It looks like you’re only just getting through.”
“I fucked up when I was younger. I’ve not tried to kill myself in over a decade.”
Gash tilted his head to the side. “You’re not going to kill yourself anymore.”
“I’ve thought about it. I deserve it.”
“Why?”
She gritted her teeth, glaring at him.
“I’m not going to stop with my questions. You may as well answer them. From the look in your eye you’re back to feeling guilty again.”
“I was selfish. I wanted one more chance to see Whizz, and when I did, you all took out my club.” She stopped talking. Her hands were shaking. “I deserved to die with them. They died because of me.”
“You’ve got that guilt and blame down to a tee. You lived because of Whizz.” He leaned over the table to get close. Out of the corner of her eye she saw Angel and Prue were ordering their food. They were in a long queue, which left her alone with Gash. “If it wasn’t for him, you’d be dead along with those men. Your crew, the fuckers who thought they could mess in our town, would have gotten you killed.” He held his hand up to stop her from talking. “Did you agree with what they were doing?”
“It doesn’t matter if I agreed. I went along with them.”
“You didn’t agree with them. You, Lacey, you came to the hospital to make sure we didn’t kill Butch. You’re not like your club. Whatever guilt you’ve got, you have to let it go. It’s not worth it.”
“Why are you telling me this? Why are you trying to help me?” she asked. “I’m not part of the club.”
“I’m doing this to help Whizz. He deserves it. I’m helping him, and I see the way he is with you. I heard what the guys said from the moment you entered Whizz’s life. You’re both fucking broken, and together you can fix each other. Don’t feel guilty. Those men who thought they were getting revenge would have killed you eventually, not with their own gun, but by their own actions.”
He pulled away, smiling as the other two women placed the trays of food on the counter.