“My parents liked him. Whatever I did in high school or anything, they never approved. I was always disappointing them, and then Steven came knocking on the door. He was a nerd but nice to me. At least in the beginning he was.”
“He was trying to impress your parents?” he asked.
“I don’t know. We went on a few dates at my parents’ insistence. We became a couple. Once you’re seen with the same person more than once, you’re a guaranteed couple. That’s what I mean about staying here. People will think we’re a couple, now.”
“We’ll deal with that when it comes.”
She liked that he didn’t appear disgusted. “He took me to the movies one night. It was one of those movies where you sit in the car. I was bored and wanted to go home. We had sex in the back of the car. He kept kissing me, and one thing led to another and bam. Virginity gone.” She remembered the pain of that night. He hadn’t been gentle. She’d tried to stop him, but in the end she’d let it happen.
“Did you want to be with him that night?” Gabriel asked. The tears fell harder than ever. No one had ever asked what she’d wanted. They always expected her to want everything that had come to her. The kids and Steven.
“No.” She sobbed the word out. For six years she’d kept her thoughts to herself. Six years where she gave herself to a man she couldn’t stand.
“Let it out.” He held her close as she let loose all of her emotions she’d kept bottled up for years. The pain and heartache from her predicament.
After some time, she managed to calm down. Her head hurt from the constant crying. Gabriel passed her a tissue, which she was grateful for.
“What happened next?” he asked.
“I got pregnant. He told my parents he wanted to marry me. Two months later I was Mrs. Grant, and I knew I had twins on the way. His parents moved us into a home, and he got a job. Everything was going fine.”
“You weren’t happy?”
“I was doing what everyone expected of me.” She looked down at her clasped hands. Her left hand no longer had the small gold band on her finger. How many times had she looked down at that gold band in the six years she’d been married and felt trapped? Too many to count. She remembered the fights and the pain from his fist along with the constant waiting for him to go to sleep so she could clean up the mess he’d created.
“Were you happy?” he asked.
“No.”
“Do you love your kids?”
She gasped, her hand covering her mouth. “Of course. They were the only thing good to come from my life with Steven. I would give me whole life for them.”
“You’d be surprised the number of women who’d wish otherwise.”
“No. Not me. I hated my life with Steven but never with them. Seeing their faces in the morning is what helped to get by.”
“When was the first time he hit you?”
****
Gabriel knew he was asking a lot of questions, but he wanted to get to know the woman inside. Amy was damaged by what her ex-husband had done to her. He knew she hadn’t talked with anyone about her life. From the moment he kicked the door down to this instant of her sitting with her legs in his lap, she’d been constantly fighting.
She probably didn’t know what a break was. She licked her lips, and he noticed she did that a lot when she wasn’t happy with her life.
“A week after Mia and Billy were born. He’d been out at work. For his dad I think. In the early days the twins wouldn’t sleep. I had to take what rest I could. My parents weren’t interested. A woman’s role was in the home, and she needed to take care of her own family. He came home. The twins were asleep, and I hadn’t done anything. There were dishes over the side. The clothes hadn’t been washed.”
She stopped in her explanation, and Gabriel knew she was gaining herself.
“His food wasn’t on the table. I hadn’t eaten. I came downstairs wrapped in a robe. I’d taken a shower, and he was looking round, inside the cupboards. I went to give him a hug, and with the back of his hand, he slapped me. I don’t want to go into more. Let’s just say after that day, I always had dinner on the table, the pots cleaned, and the washing done.”
“What about the chains on the fridge and cupboards?”
“I gained a lot of weight with the twins. He didn’t want to sleep in the bed with a fatty, and so he weighed me daily and left out rations for me to eat. If I didn’t use the required food in his dinner, he’d know.”
He wanted to go to the prison and kill the bastard. Gabriel cupped her face and forced her to look at him. “You’re a beautiful woman, and what that bastard did to you was wrong.”
“I should have got out. I should never have let it get that far. Mia and Billy deserve better than what they grew up in.”
“You’ve changed that now. You’ve got me, baby. I won’t let anything happen to you.” He promised himself that with every breath in his body, Amy Grant would never know a single moment of pain if he could help it.
“You’re the only person I can trust. Anna and Laura mean well, but they’ve got their own lives to live. Without you, I’ve got no one.”
He held her close, his feelings in turmoil inside him. The need to protect her and claim her as his own filled him to his very core.
There was no way he could love her. He’d given up on love many years ago. Staring past her head to the television, he couldn’t help but think about life with her. In his mind he saw coming home to her. The two children seated at the table, laughing over something Amy said, a pot of stew bubbling on the stove while she pulled bread out of the oven. There was once a time he craved a normal life with vanilla sex and a loving relationship. With the many years he’d spent in the big city solving murder cases, his heart had grown hard and his loving even harder. Gabriel was a dominant man. In the past he’d gotten through his life by using that control to bring women pleasure through the combination of dominance and pain. When it came to the woman in his arms, the feelings she evoked startled him. A part of him wanted to tie her up and spank her ass. The need to hear her screaming out his name in pleasure called to him more than a cold beer on a hot summer’s day, did. Another part of him wanted to lay her on his bed and make love to her for the rest of his life. The two parts of his soul were wrestling with each other. More often than not, he wanted to lay her down and love her body. He knew no other man would give her the kind of devotion that he could.