I didn't know how I felt about being dragged into this bizarre conversation. Some people were scared of me. Maybe he was too.
Judging from the amusement in his voice when he spoke, it appeared he wasn't. "People think I'm unstable, but I tell you, Rose is ten times worse. Of course, that makes it harder for people to f**k with you, so I'm all for it." Leaning back on his heels, he finally broke the intimate space between them. "And I sure as hell didn't do that. Find out who did, though...and what I did to Ralf won't seem like anything."
His gallant offer of creepy vengeance didn't exactly reassure Lissa...but it did thrill her a little. "I don't want you doing anything like that. And I still don't know who did it."
He leaned back toward her and caught her wrists in his hands. He started to say something, then stopped and looked down in surprise, running his thumbs over faint, barely there scars. Looking back up at her, he had a strange - for him - kindness in his face.
"You might not know who did it. But you know something. Something you aren't talking about."
She stared at him, a swirl of emotions playing in her chest. "You can't know all my secrets," she murmured.
He glanced back down at her wrists and then released them, that dry smile of his back on his face. "No. I guess not."
A feeling of peace settled over her, a feeling I thought only I could bring. Returning to my own head and my room, I sat on the floor staring at my math book. Then, for reasons I didn't really get, I slammed it shut and threw it against the wall.
I spent the rest of the night brooding until the time I was supposed to meet Jesse came around. Slipping downstairs, I went into the kitchen - a place I could visit so long as I kept things brief - and caught his eye when I cut through the main visiting area.
Moving past him, I paused and whispered, "There's a lounge on the fourth floor that nobody uses. Take the stairs on the other side of the bathrooms and meet me there in five minutes. The lock on the door is broken."
He complied to the second, and we found the lounge dark, dusty, and deserted. The drop in guardian numbers over the years meant a lot of the dorm stayed empty, a sad sign for Moroi society but terribly convenient right now.
He sat down on the couch, and I lay back on it, putting my feet in his lap. I was still annoyed after Lissa and Christian's bizarre attic romance and wanted nothing more than to forget about it for a while.
"You really here to study, or was it just an excuse?" I asked.
"No. It was real. Had to do an assignment with Meredith." The tone in his voice indicated he wasn't happy about that.
"Oooh," I teased. "Is working with a dhampir beneath your royal blood? Should I be offended?"
He smiled, showing a mouth full of perfect white teeth and fangs. "You're a lot hotter than she is."
"Glad I make the cut." There was a sort of a heat in his eyes that was turning me on, as was his hand sliding up my leg. But I needed to do something first. It was time for some vengeance. "Mia must too, since you guys let her hang out with you. She's not royal."
His finger playfully poked me in the calf. "She's with Aaron. And I've got lots of friends who aren't royal. And friends who are dhamps. I'm not a total ass**le."
"Yeah, but did you know her parents are practically custodians for the Drozdovs?"
The hand on my leg stopped. I'd exaggerated, but he was a sucker for gossip - and he was notorious for spreading it.
"Seriously?"
"Yeah. Scrubbing floors and stuff like that."
"Huh."
I could see the wheels turning in his dark blue eyes and had to hide a smile. The seed was planted.
Sitting up, I moved closer to him and draped a leg over his lap. I wrapped my arms around him, and without further delay, thoughts of Mia disappeared as his testosterone kicked in. He kissed me eagerly - sloppily, even - pushing me against the back of the couch, and I relaxed into what had to be the first enjoyable physical activity I'd had in weeks.
We kissed like that for a long time, and I didn't stop him when he pulled off my shirt.
"I'm not having sex," I warned between kisses. I had no intention of losing my virginity on a couch in a lounge.
He paused, thinking about this, and finally decided not to push it. "Okay."
But he pushed me onto the couch, lying over me, still kissing with that same fierceness. His lips traveled down to my neck, and when the sharp points of his fangs brushed against my skin, I couldn't help an excited gasp.
He raised himself up, looking into my face with open surprise. For a moment, I could barely breathe, recalling that rush of pleasure that a vampire bite could fill me with, wondering what it'd be like to feel that while making out. Then the old taboos kicked in. Even if we didn't have sex, giving blood while we did this was still wrong, still dirty.
"Don't," I warned.
"You want to." His voice held excited wonder. "I can tell."
"No, I don't."
His eyes lit up. "You do. How - hey, have you done it before?"
"No," I scoffed. "Of course not."
Those gorgeous blue eyes watched me, and I could see the wheels spinning behind them. Jesse might flirt a lot and have a big mouth, but he wasn't stupid.
"You act like you have. You got excited when I was by your neck."
"You're a good kisser," I countered, though it wasn't entirely true. He drooled a little more than I would have preferred. "Don't you think everyone would know if I was giving blood?"
The realization seized him. "Unless you weren't doing it before you left. You did it while you were gone, didn't you? You fed Lissa."
"Of course not," I repeated.
But he was on to something, and he knew it. "It was the only way. You didn't have feeders. Oh, man."
"She found some," I lied. It was the same line we'd fed Natalie, the one she'd spread around and that no one - except Christian - had ever questioned. "Plenty of humans are into it."
"Sure," he said with a smile. He leaned his mouth back to my neck.
"I'm not a blood whore," I snapped, pulling away from him.
"But you want to. You like it. All you dhamp girls do." His teeth were on my skin again. Sharp. Wonderful.
I had a feeling hostility would only make things worse, so I defused the situation with teasing. "Stop it," I said gently, running a fingertip over his lips. "I told you, I'm not like that. But if you want something to do with your mouth, I can give you some ideas."
That peaked his interest. "Yeah? Like wha - ?"