“What do you mean? What happened between the two of you?” he asked.
He could forget getting the details. “Things between us got pretty intense and that’s all I’m going to say about it.”
He sat in amazement and said, “This could really happen. You and Claire might get together.”
If I didn’t know how crazy it sounded, I might have been pissed at him for being shocked about the possibility of Claire and I being together. His reaction caused self doubt to flood me and I immediately began to backpedal. “Nah, it’s never going to happen. She won’t break up with him for me.”
“I think you’re wrong. Claire wouldn’t have left with you and got intense with you if it wasn’t a possibility. I think you give yourself too little credit.”
Dane was encouraging me to hope for something that would never happen, but it was a lesson I learned early in life-don’t allow myself to hope because it was life’s cruel joke of lifting you higher before dropping you flat on your ass.
“I guess we’ll see.”
“I guess we will, but you need to go get a shower, dude. If Claire smelled you right now, she’d run the other way. You stink.”
Working around motor oil was a job hazard. “Thanks, I didn’t know that.”
“If you smell better when you come out of the shower, you can hang with me and Harrison tonight.”
“Okay, that sounds cool.”
16 Many Shades of Black
Claire
Payton called first thing Saturday morning and I half lied to her. I didn’t tell her the part about staying out with Jessie until two in the morning or the part about nearly jumping him under the moonlight, but I did tell her I made some leeway so she wouldn’t be suspicious if he seemed a little more friendly with me.
I spent Saturday night with my parents and the Hendersons, while trying to avoid being alone with Forbes. He knew something wasn’t right, but I found myself not caring and spent the night being preoccupied with thoughts of the night I shared with Jessie.
When the next day came, I still had Jessie on my mind and I thought about the plans he had for the day and couldn’t break. I wondered if they included a girl and I felt a spark of jealousy. I tried to not become fixated on it, but if I had a way of finding out where he lived, I confess I would have stalked him to find out.
I was glad when Monday finally arrived, so I could see him again. I beat him to class and took the seat guaranteed to make him my partner for the hour. We had covered five of the six ingredients, so today left Making Connections and I smiled to myself with the thought of the connection we had already made.
I waited anxiously for him to enter the classroom, and when he finally did, my heart skipped a beat because he looked at me and smiled, reassuring me he didn’t regret the time we spent together.
The desks were arranged differently today, in groups of two, and he took the seat facing me.“Hey, you.”
He put his backpack down and said, “Hey, Princess. Did you have a good weekend?”
“I had a fabulous weekend.” I was counting my night with him as the fabulous part. “And yours?
He smiled and it was beautiful. “It had a strong start, but sort of went downhill from that point. I’m feeling a little optimistic and I hold out hope that this week will be better.”
I raised an eyebrow and said, “Have you asked the almighty 8 Ball? I guarantee it will have an answer for you.”
He leaned in toward me and softly said,“No, I thought I’d ask you instead.”
I knew what his meaning was, but I wanted to hear him say the words. “Ask me what?”
His voice was so soft. “If you would spend some time with me again. I’m pretty sure we still have some exploring to do.”
Yeah, we had much exploring to do and I was looking forward to it. “Yes, I’d like that very much.”
Mrs. Tanner shut the classroom door and told us we would be finishing up with our last creative ingredient today. She gave us our assignment envelope and I pushed it in Jessie’s direction. “You read the assignment today.”
He opened it and read aloud, “Making or seeing connections is bringing together seemingly unrelated ideas, objects or events in a way that leads to new understanding. Making connections is at the heart of learning. Figuring out what’s the same, what’s different and making unusual connections is at the core of creativity. To better acquaint yourself with your partner, compile a list of similarities and differences and compare them. There’s a suggestion list if you’d like to see it.”
I reached to take the list. I allowed my fingers to graze his and was reminded of his touch and the way it made me feel. I looked into his eyes and I wanted to touch him again. With our desks facing and pushed together, I reached out to touch his hand behind the concealment of my backpack after I placed it on our desks between us. My touch surprised him and he squeezed my hand. I knew our touch could only last for a moment, but I took the chance because I desperately needed to feel his skin on mine.
Neither of us spoke, but we both smiled, then our hands parted ways.
I looked at the list of suggestions and read the one at the top of the list. “Compare our family dynamics.”
* * *
Jessie
Family dynamics was not something I would willingly share about myself with Claire. The real Jessie Boone was way too complicated and hearing about his life would be awkward and uncomfortable, so I decided to tell her things that were easy to hear.
I ask her to tell me about her perfect world first so I had time to create my fictitious life to portray a seemingly comfortable life that wouldn’t draw sympathy.
“I live with both of my parents and I am the youngest of three children. My dad is a physician, an OB-GYN, and my mom is a clinical psychologist. My brother, Ryan, is the oldest. He’s in medical school and my sister, Maggie, is a CRNA.”
I could tell her the truth-I lived with my dope dealing grandmother because my mother was shot and killed in a drug deal gone wrong. The same people that killed my mother in front of me then shot me and left me for dead while my two little brothers hid in a closet. Maybe her psychologist mom could help me figure out how to not be so screwed up after all I’ve been through. Maybe she’d even want to go with me on the rare occasions I got to see my little brothers at their foster parent’s house.
Nope. No way I was telling her the truth, so I began to weave my tale. “I live with both of my parents and I was the only one in the litter. My dad is a mechanic and runs a garage and body shop, so I know a lot about fixing vehicles, and my mom is a hairdresser.”