Until I met Drew and I wanted to become someone different, someone worthy of him.
Drew was far from simple. Complex and rich and gorgeous, everything seemed to come easy to him. But it didn’t. His world was shit. His father was oblivious to what was going on. His stepmother was an evil witch who molested him. He let me into his life, and I changed it for the better.
But what if he finds someone else? What if there really is someone else out there for him, someone better than me? He’ll be traveling. On the road with the team, playing games all over the country, and I’ll be stuck at home, making sure Owen’s getting good grades. I can’t pull my brother out of his high school. He’s lived his entire life here, has friends, is on the football team. He works at The District, just like I used to. His life is good there.
Drew and I are in love and we want to spend the rest of our lives together. Yet here I sit full of insecurities while this beautiful man is trying to convince me to run away with him and get married.
I mean, really. What the hell is wrong with me?
“Okay.” I blow out a harsh breath, trying to gather my wayward thoughts. They’re scattered everywhere, trying to figure out what’s the best next step when deep down, I already know what that step is. “Where do you want to get married? Vegas?” A quickie marriage had always been the plan. We don’t have enough family to warrant throwing a big wedding and we didn’t want the hassle anyway.
He grimaces and shakes his head, then moves so he’s sitting right next to me on the couch, slinging an arm around my shoulders. Leaning in, he nuzzles my hair with his nose, breathing deep, and I close my eyes when I feel his lips on my forehead. “I was thinking Hawaii,” he murmurs.
Drew
Fable pulls away so she can gape at me, her hand resting on my chest. I wonder if she can feel the vibration trembling just beneath my skin, my wildly beating heart. I’m f**king nervous she’s going to say no. Why, I’m not sure, because my girl said yes to me a year ago. We just haven’t done anything about it yet. “Are you serious?” she asks.
I nod, keeping my expression solemn though everything inside me feels like it’s spiraling out of control. What if she says no? What if I’m ruining her dream of having a giant wedding? I don’t think I am. She’s never mentioned she wanted a huge ceremony. It’s not her style. And we’ve already discussed most of the details, so we’re pretty much on the same page. “As a heart attack.”
“How long can you get away for?” Her fingers curl into my shirt and I’m having a sense of déjà vu. How many times has she pushed at my chest, like she wants to shove me away when really she’s always tugging me back. Pulling me in, absorbing me.
And I always want to absorb her. Take her in and make her mine. Again and again and again.
Yeah. I’ve got it bad right now. It’s all the change happening in our lives. I secretly long to return to a simpler time. To the happiest time of my life, only a year ago, when we were falling deeper and deeper in love as every day passed. When I was still in college and she worked at the restaurant full time. When we would go over to Jen and Colin’s house and hang out, sometimes bringing Owen with us, along with his friend Wade. Like a happy little family. My heart had been full. Fuller than it had ever felt in my entire life.
I long for that feeling again. I want to fill my heart with nothing but Fable. I need to focus on this girl, this woman who’s about to become my wife.
My f**king wife. People say we’re too young, but I don’t care. When it’s right, you know.
And I definitely know.
She’s watching me now, those big green eyes shimmering as she waits. She looks ready to cry, and it better not be from sadness.
“How long do you want to take a Hawaiian vacation?” I ask.
A giant grin breaks out across her face. She looks beyond happy. “Can we sit on the beach and sip mai tais?”
“We can do whatever you want.” I squeeze her close, press my face against the top of her head. I can smell her shampoo. I close my eyes as the silky, soft strands of her hair tickle my skin.
She tucks her face against my neck, her lips moving against my skin as she speaks. “Romantic sunset ceremony?”
“That sounds perfect,” I murmur, because it does. Holding her hands as the sun melts into the ocean, her face dappled with shades of orange and pink and red. She’ll have a flower in her hair, the dress she wears will be gauzy and white, and we’ll both cry. I know it. I’m not ashamed to admit it, either.
Pulling away slightly, Fable studies me, a little smile curling her lips. I love those lips. I love that smile. She reaches out, smudges her thumb against the corner of my mouth, and I wince, the twinge of pain reminding me that I cut myself earlier when someone tackled me during practice, causing my helmet to somehow hit the corner of my mouth just right.
“What happened?” she murmurs, her thumb lingering on my lips, wiping away at the blood I can’t see.
“Got tackled. Knocked my mouth on the helmet when I hit the ground.” I grimace when she presses harder. I can’t worry about the cut now. I have more important things to focus on. Like our future. “Let’s leave next week, Fable. Call up a travel agent or whatever and book the flight.”
“I can book the flight for us and find a hotel,” she says, her sweet voice soft, her hand dropping away from my mouth. “It’s going to be expensive, though, since it’s so last minute.”
I shake my head. “Money’s not an issue.” I’m making a shit ton. It’s ridiculous. Dad’s thrilled. He’s so freaking proud his son is going to start in the NFL. I went back to Carmel a few weeks ago. Without Fable, all alone, facing my demons, facing my father. Not one and the same anymore, thank God.
It went well. He took me to the country club where Fable and I had gone with him, and … yeah. It’s hard for me to think about that woman, what she did to me, the guilt I carried for so many years. Fable can hardly say her name out loud. Hell, I bet Dad feels the same way, too.
My stepmom. Adele. The woman who seduced me, who tricked me and my father and everyone else in her life. She killed herself in front of me and Fable. I’m glad she’s gone. I don’t miss her.
She doesn’t deserve to be missed.
While I was in Carmel, I had lunch with Dad and his friends, let him brag all over me. It’s the happiest I’ve seen him in a long time, and sitting there at the table, listening to him go on and on, a mixture of regret and love and pride fills me.