“And how long will you be gone?”
“At least two weeks. Could be longer.”
“Well, that just gives us good reason to celebrate when you get back, because I’ll have missed you and you’ll have good news. I’m sure of it.” I pull her to me and she plops down on my lap. She winds her thin arms around my neck and kisses me. I know all I’d have to do is pick her up and carry her into the bedroom and I could have an early-morning quickie, but I don’t. I’m not that heartless and inconsiderate, because even as she’s in my lap, wiggling around and kissing me, I’m thinking of bright green eyes, jet black hair and the luscious little body sleeping just a couple rooms away. And that’s not cool.
Marissa leans back and frowns down at me. “You still seem distracted.”
“I’m fine. Really. I just need to get going. I was supposed to be getting some paperwork ready over an hour ago.”
She smiles. “So you’re saying you’re blowing off work to spend the morning with me?”
“Yep. That’s what I’m saying.”
She gets that look in her eyes and she presses her upper body into mine and rubs back and forth. Obligingly, I cup her small br**sts and stroke her hard ni**les with my thumbs. Her lids close a little and I know where this is going.
And then a throat clears. Both Marissa and I look up to see Olivia standing in the doorway, looking sleepy yet horrified.
“What?” Marissa snaps. “Get your coffee and go. We’re a little busy.”
She turns back to me to pick up where we left off, but I stop her. “I really need to go.” Without giving her a chance to say much else, I scoot her off my lap and stand. From the corner of my eye, I can see Olivia looking at me. I avoid eye contact at all costs. I can feel her shooting daggers at my heart, though. And at my dick. I’m sure she’s just about ready to spew venom and hatred all over the kitchen floor. What she doesn’t know, though, is that I hate myself ten times more than she could ever hate me for what I did, for what almost happened.
“But wait. I wanted to ask you if you’d pick up my car from the shop on Monday. I’ll leave my keys for you.”
“Fine,” I say hurriedly, grabbing her hand and towing her out of the kitchen.
If Olivia wanted me to feel guilty, mission accomplished!
“I’ll call you later,” I say, pecking her on the lips. “Maybe we can have dinner tonight.” In my head, I’m thinking I’ll say anything to get out of here.
“I can’t! I’m going to spend the night with Mom and then riding to the airport together with Daddy in the morning. Hang on. Let me get you my keys. I can call for the limo later.”
She rushes off, leaving me standing by the door waiting, hoping Olivia stays put. But she doesn’t. Of course.
I see her come to stand in the doorway. Although it’s against my better judgment, I turn to look at her. In her eyes is embarrassment and disappointment and shame, yes, but there’s also the spark of whatever is between us. There’s just no denying that we’re attracted to each other. Very, very attracted to each other.
I hear Marissa’s voice. She’s on the phone with someone, so I move toward Olivia.
I don’t really know what to say, so I just stand there, staring down at her. She really is breathtaking, even first thing in the morning.
Before I even realize what I’m doing, I rub my fingertips down her smooth cheek. Her eyelids flutter shut, making me want to kiss them.
“Sorry about that,” I hear Marissa say as she comes down the hall. I step back and walk to the door, stopping where she left me. I glance quickly back at Olivia. There’s a mixture of emotions on her face, emotions I can’t easily identify. Unless it’s the same thing I’m feeling, too.
CHAPTER NINETEEN - Olivia
Maybe it’s PMS. Maybe it’s just the stress of too much change too quickly. I have no idea really, but I feel like all of a sudden, my life is a train wreck.
And most of the wreckage revolves around two guys. Two guys that, for totally different reasons, are tearing me up inside. Two guys I want. Two guys I can’t have. Two guys I can’t stop thinking about.
I want Cash—badly—on a purely physical level, although he is cute and charming, which only adds to the danger level. But I want Nash just as badly, but in a different way. There’s a physical component for sure. He turns me on something fierce. But he’s just the kind of guy that I want, that I need in my life.
I don’t think I retained a single word from any of my three classes today. I’m more thankful than ever that a lot of it is fluff stuff—statistics, sociology and body mechanics, which is like the college version of gym class.
By the time I get back home, I’m exhausted. More emotionally than physically, but it ends up feeling like the same thing. In the quiet of the apartment, knowing I’ll have it all to myself for two weeks (a fact which I gleaned accidentally rather than Marissa actually telling me herself), I decide to lie down on the couch to take a short nap.
I wake up at 4:30, feeling no better. Just dead-headed. I’m still feeling icky in general, so I reach for my phone and call Shawna. I get her voice mail, which informs me she’s with her mom picking out flowers for the wedding.
The only other really close friend I have is Ginger, the bartender I worked with at Tad’s for years. Thankfully, she’s home.
After we talk for several minutes, she gets blunt, Ginger style. “All right, spill it. Something’s wrong.”
“No, nothing’s wrong.”
“You’re a terrible liar and I hate you for trying.”
I giggle. “No, you don’t.”
She pauses. “Okay, I don’t. But the only way you can make it up to me is to tell me what the hell’s up your butt.”
Ginger also has a way with words.
I sigh. “I guess I’m just missing home and friends and…I don’t know. Life just feels…complicated.”
“Uh-huh. This sounds like penis problems.”
“Ohmigod, Ginger! It’s not penis problems. You think everything is about sex.”
“Isn’t it?”
I laugh. “No. It’s not.”
“So this has nothing to do with a guy?”
I pause.
“Ah-ha! I knew it! Penis problems.”
“Well, it seems that the cause of some of my problems happens to have a penis. Well, two actually.”
“Oh sweet Mary! You’re dating a guy with two dicks?”