“Wilder. I—”
“Tell me you remember how good it was. I’m not imagining that, am I? I get that you don’t do hook-ups, and that seeing me again is a reminder of that, but you don’t just throw a connection like that away because the timeline is wrong.”
“It’s not about that timeline.”
“Then tell me what it is. I want you. You want me. I’m not giving that up without a fight.”
“I’m not good for you.”
“First of all, bullshit. And second, what about what’s good for you? You’re in here alone while your friends are out there talking and laughing and drinking. You find someone you have mind-blowing chemistry with, and rather than seeing where it goes, you cut it off before it even gets started. Something happens in your life that throws you so off-kilter that you seek out comfort from a stranger. I don’t know what that is. I don’t know why. But I know you deserve more than one night. I know you deserve to laugh with your friends, not stand on the sidelines.” I brace one hand on the counter beside her and lift the other to curve around her cheek. At my touch, her eyes flutter closed, and she exhales so strongly that I wonder how long she’s been holding her breath. “Stop telling yourself what you can’t have or shouldn’t have. You deserve more, Kalli.”
I throw my patience out the window, and bend to touch my mouth to hers. It’s just a light touch, but it causes a tug of desire at the base of my spine all the same. She doesn’t quite kiss me back, but her lips part, and I can feel the puff of her breath against my mouth, sharp and uncontrolled. I remember how much she liked it when I told her what I wanted to do to her, so I take a chance and push things a little further. I grab hold of her knees, and gently pull her legs apart. She gasps, and her eyes pop open, but she doesn’t move away. Our faces are an inch apart, eyes locked together as I settle between her thighs.
“This,” I whisper against her mouth. “I remember how fucking good this was. To have your legs around me. The way we fit … it’s like you were made for me. I remember how you taste. The sounds you made. If we were alone, I’d show you exactly what you deserve, sweet. You’d come apart on my fingers and my tongue and my cock.” Damn, just imagining what it would feel like to be inside her is enough to make me ache. “Then we’d do it all again. I’d make up for all the days that have passed since I last touched you. Would you let me do that? Or will you try to run from me again?” Her only answer is to close her eyes and let her head fall back. I lower my lips to the hollow of her neck and kiss her pulse. It beats franticly beneath her skin, and my touch is gentle even though all I want to do is crush her against me. “Maybe I should tie you to my bed,” I suggest. “You wouldn’t run then.”
Her right hand comes up to grip my bicep, and she squeezes hard.
“You like that?” Interesting. “You could let go with me, Kalli. I’d take care of you. If you’d let me.”
I pull back from her neck, passing my lips over her jaw first, then the corner of her mouth. But I don’t go any farther than that. I’m okay with being on the offensive, but I want her to be the one to drop the walls. If not, I’m only going to end up climbing them over and over again.
“I—” She swallows, and her eyes flick back and forth between mine. “I don’t know if I can. If I can risk …” I brush my lips over hers, dragging my tongue over her bottom lip, and she moans. I swear to God, I can almost taste the sound on my tongue. So fucking sweet my head spins.
I want her to choose this, but clearly I’m not above playing a little dirty. All I can guess is that she’s been burned before, and she doesn’t want to chance it happening again.
“You’ve got to risk to get the reward,” I tell her, sliding a hand around her waist and inching her just a little closer. “I won’t hurt you, Kalli.”
She exhales sharply, and makes a noise that’s almost a laugh. Pressing her lips together, she looks as if she’s steeling herself. Whether to push me away or pull me closer, I’m not sure. And I don’t get the chance to find out.
Because at that moment, Lennox charges into the kitchen again. “Time for a drinking—damn it. I have the worst timing ever.”
Yes. Yes, she does. Kalli’s hand drops from my arm, but I don’t release her or move away.
“Well, it appears you’ve done your job, Dazzler. Now both of you come celebrate Christmas with us by getting blackout drunk.”
“Gotta say. I’ve never had a Christmas quite like this one.”
Lennox crosses her arms over her chest and says, “You’re welcome. Now come hang out with us.” She refuses to leave the kitchen until we’re with her. And even though I really want to keep Kalli to myself, I meant what I said about her being with her friends. She talks about them as if she’s never really had friends before, at least not that many. And I get the feeling that it’s all tied together with why she’s keeping me at arm’s length and why she was so upset the night we were together. I take her hand as she slides off the counter. She tiptoes across the floor, just in case I missed any glass, and the two of us follow Lennox into the living room. Avery has moved to a spot on the floor just below Jack, leaving half of the couch open for Kalli and me to sit beside Lennox and her boyfriend. I shed my leather jacket, and lay it over the couch arm. It’s a tight squeeze with me on the outside, and Kalli ends up nearly on my lap. I lay one arm along the back of the couch to give us a little extra room. She only hesitates for a few seconds before pressing into my side.
“Alrighty,” Lennox says. “For you newbies, first up is Merry Mustache. You don’t get much simpler than this.” She nods at Mick, and he strides over to the TV and tapes a construction paper mustache a little left and down from the center of the screen. “Thank you, Mick. Now, we put on a variety of Christmas movies that everyone is sick of. You can watch it or don’t. But if during the movie, the fake mustache lines up correctly with someone’s face on the screen, yell Merry Mustache. Everyone else besides the Merry-Mustache-wisher then has to drink. Dazzler, where is your drink?”
I shrug. “You ran me out of the kitchen before I had time.”
“Mick, be your usual amazing self and get Wilder a drink.”
Her boyfriend holds up his own beer in question, and I nod in approval.