“And you ran from me.” He slowly reached out and gently straightened one of her red corkscrew curls, watching with an inner smile as it bounced back into place. It took him by surprise how soft and silky her hair was. “But it was the best thing you could have done.” At her questioning look, he elaborated. “It made me realize a few things. Namely that living without you isn’t an option.”
“Because the urges won’t ease.”
“Because you’re more important than anything else,” he corrected, taking a step toward her so that there was only a hairbreadth between them. As her scent wrapped around him, he barely resisted the temptation to bury his face into the crook of her neck. “I’ve missed your scent. It drives me crazy.” Drinking in every detail of her face, he smoothed the pad of his thumb across her cheekbone. “I’ve missed looking at you. Watching you.”
She told herself to step back, but it simply didn’t happen. As if the mating urges weren’t enough to deal with, she now had his scent—the guy smelled like cedar, cinnamon, danger, and a dark masculinity—swirling around her. The scent caressed her senses and made her tingle all over. Finally her legs began to work, and she backed away, shaking her head. “I want you to leave.”
His wolf growled at not only her words but the distance she’d created between them. Nick quickly closed it. “I can’t do that. Six months I’ve searched for you. Six f**king long months. I didn’t do it just to walk away from you.”
She snorted. “Why? You did it easily enough the first time.”
“Nothing about it was easy.” He ran his hand through her curls, glad when she didn’t step away. “You’re so full of life, and I’m broken and jaded, so you deserve better. But I’ve discovered that I’m not selfless enough to leave you alone.” Resting his forehead against hers, he cupped her neck and began breezing his thumb up and down the column of her throat. “I’m a bastard for what I put you through, and I’m sorry. I won’t let you down again, I promise. Just come with me.”
Her chest ached at the plea in his eyes—eyes that always looked so haunted and shadowed that it made her wonder what he’d been through that had stained them that way. His thumb traveled up to her mouth and traced the outline of her lips as if he was claiming them. Shaya had every intention of pushing him away. Any second now she would do it.
“Since the first day I saw you, I’ve wondered if your lips are as soft as they look.” A low growl rumbled up his chest when she nervously licked her bottom lip, making him want to do the same. She had the most enticing mouth—soft, sensual, and plush. He realized he wasn’t going to be able to move without tasting it. “And I’ve wondered if you taste as good as you smell.”
Oh shit. Shaya tried shoving him away, but it had zero effect. In fact, he didn’t seem to notice. By the way his body tensed as if to spring, she had expected him to jump into action, for his hands to skate all over her and his mouth to come down forcefully on hers. Instead, he simply began to sip from her lips and nip at the curve of her inactive mouth. When he sucked her bottom lip and bit it gently—a total weak spot for her—she couldn’t hold back the low, contented sigh.
Then he was sipping from her lips again…seducing her mouth, she suddenly realized. And it had worked. Although she had told herself that she would push him away, she was actually chasing his mouth with hers, wanting more, but he pulled back each time. She understood the message: she’d get what he gave her, nothing more. Instead of using his physical strength to assert his dominance, he’d literally seduced her into submission. Sneaky. Fucking. Wolf. She would have pulled back, but then his mouth landed on hers and took total control of it.
Nick groaned as her taste burst on his tongue, practically imprinting itself into him. He slid his hands into her hair and tugged, feeling her shiver against him. For so f**king long he’d wanted this, wanted her. Touching her wasn’t easing the urges as he’d expected. Instead, sensations were crawling all over and through him. Worse, he was being taunted by a crushing, primal need all tangled up with a heavy sense of possessiveness and a fierce drive to own. He was thinking of pushing her against the wall and ripping the clothes from her body when he felt her suddenly tense in his arms.
Surprised by her own strength, Shaya abruptly tore her mouth from his and used the hands that had been plastered to his chest to push him back—the effect was more of her bouncing backward. “Enough.” Hating that she had responded so enthusiastically to his touch, she skirted around him to put some space between them again, holding her hand up to warn him off. It didn’t work. He advanced on her. Not quickly, but slowly and stealthily, like a predator prowling toward skittish prey. “It’s too late.”
Hating the pain in her eyes, he wanted to punch himself. “You’re not the only one who’s been hurting, Shay. Yes, it’s my fault—I have no one to blame but myself. But I won’t ever hurt you like that again.”
A part of Shaya wanted to believe his promise, was hooked on how earnest he looked and sounded, and was totally hung up on just how much more alive she had felt in these moments with him than she had in the last six months. But she was simply too hurt and wary to take the gamble. “Just go.”
“Not without you.”
“You have no choice in the matter. I can’t go with you.”
“Why?”
“Because I don’t trust you!”
Nick felt as though she’d punched him. The breath left his lungs in a whoosh. It didn’t matter that it was his own fault, and it wasn’t even a surprise, but it still hurt like a motherfucker.
“I don’t trust you not to hurt me. I don’t trust you not to leave me again.”
Something about the way she’d said the latter words had Nick narrowing his eyes. This wasn’t just about him. Being left was a big thing for her, and there was clearly a story behind that. He cupped her chin. “That’s not going to happen.”
She snickered, slapping his hand aside. “How do I know that? Huh? How do I know you won’t suddenly decide that not being Alpha isn’t working for you? That you need to leave me behind because it’s ‘not safe’ for me to be your Alpha female? I’m not going through that shit again. You had your chance to claim me, and you f**ked it up. Now go.”
Not a thing could have made Nick move from where he was except for the tears now filling her eyes. He wanted to hold her and comfort her, but if she didn’t trust him, the last thing she would feel was comforted. So far, he hadn’t respected any of her wishes. If he had any chance of earning her trust, he needed to start now.