Only he’d actually been the man hiding her past from her.
The pain of betrayal was there, and she wondered if it always would be.
“That’s what a soldier does.” Anger roughened Thomas’s words. “And, yes, damn it, that was what I did.” He swung to face her. “I took you to that cabin. I...called in backup.”
“Mercer...”
“EOD agents put the body inside.”
She’d gone over the reports. There hadn’t been enough of the dead man’s blood in the cabin, so the police had thought his body had been dumped there, but they’d never been able to find the kill site.
The EOD were too good at covering their tracks.
“I didn’t want to tie you up. Your wrists were already raw and bloody.”
She blinked away tears.
“You wouldn’t stay behind. You kept trying to follow,” he said quietly. “I didn’t...I didn’t have a choice.”
“Actually, you did. You’ve known this for years, you could’ve said—”
“Before I left you at that cabin, I told you that you couldn’t speak to the police about me. I told you I was working a case and lives were on the line.” He yanked a hand through his hair. “At first, I thought you were covering for me. Doing what I’d asked because you promised me that you’d keep quiet.”
She frowned at him.
“Later...later I realized you just didn’t remember, and by then, I was in so deep at the EOD that telling you the real truth wasn’t an option.” His hand dropped. “I even thought it might be better for you. Not knowing. You seemed to be making a good life for yourself. You graduated at the top of your college class. You went to Quantico. You had a wide circle of friends. Hell, you were even involved with that jerk psychology professor for a time.”
She took a step back as realization slammed into her. “You were watching me.” That was her gut response. He wasn’t just quoting facts he’d discovered in some background report on her. The anger that hummed in his voice when he talked about her ex, Jim...it was too strong. Too personal.
He’d even told her before that he’d seen her, but she hadn’t seen him.
Because he was watching me?
“I needed to make sure you were all right.”
The growl of an engine grew louder. A snowplow? The sheriff? She didn’t look away from Thomas to find out. “How long have you been watching me?”
“It’s not... I check on you, okay? When I’m back in the U.S. Between assignments.” He seemed to be weighing his words and responding so carefully. “I just like to make sure that you’re safe.”
I’ll always be with you.
“The EOD gathered a lot of intel on your attacker, and we thought it was just one guy, working alone. You seemed to be the first victim he’d taken. Mercer believed that, with his death, it was over, but I...just needed to be sure.” He sighed. “I needed to be sure because at night, when I closed my eyes, I would still hear you screaming for me to help you.”
There it was. All of the secrets from her past. The truth she’d sought for so long, and now, hearing all of those details just made her feel numb. Like she’d just taken a dive into another ice pond.
But it made sense. His story explained the strange connection she’d felt with Thomas. The awareness. He was her past. The man who’d saved her in the dark.
He saved me, then left me.
No wonder her emotions had been all over the place with him.
She’d even...even wondered if she might be falling for him.
“Say something,” he gritted out, his eyes glinting.
“What do you want me to say?” That emotionless voice didn’t sound right. It didn’t sound like her voice at all.
“Yell at me. Curse me. Tell me I’m a jerk for keeping the truth from you.” He took another step toward her. “Tell me that I should’ve chosen you and turned my back on the EOD.”
Her eyes widened. “Is that what you want me to say?” As she stared into Thomas’s eyes, Noelle saw his guilt. Heavy. Thick.
“You were seventeen.” Another step brought him even closer. “You were terrified. You...you asked me to stay with you. You begged me to stay.”
She shook her head. The memory was right there. “And you said you’d always be with me.”
“I’m sorry,” he rasped.
So was she.
The growling of that engine was so close. She rushed away from the window and yanked open the front door. Noelle saw not one but two vehicles driving up behind the snowplow. One was the sheriff’s car and the other, a dark SUV. As she watched, they braked and the passenger door of the SUV opened. A man jumped out. Her eyes narrowed as she stared at him.
He wore a thick coat, but she could tell his shoulders were broad. His back was straight. He yanked off his woolen cap as he headed toward her. The closer he came, the more she noticed the gray at his temples, his stony visage....
“No way,” Noelle whispered. Sunglasses shielded the man’s eyes, but she knew they would be green—and sharp.
Another man flanked the guy, a man who walked with a tense alertness, which broadcasted his military background.
She knew the second guy was a bodyguard, even before he turned and blocked the sheriff from heading up to the cabin.
And the man striding so confidently toward them was none other than—
“Mercer?” Thomas said, shock in his voice.
He should be shocked. As a rule, the EOD boss didn’t do field work. He stayed in his office, and he pulled the strings. But, thanks to the recent attack at the EOD, there was no D.C. office.
“Inside,” Bruce Mercer snapped. “You never know who’s watching.”
He was the man who’d kept her past from her. The man who knew where all the bodies were buried in D.C.
And because he was there, right in front of her, Noelle knew the situation in Camden, Alaska, had to be very, very bad.
If Bruce Mercer was there, then death wasn’t far behind.
Chapter Eight
“Judging by the way Noelle is looking at me, I guess you told her everything, Agent Anthony?”
They were inside the cabin. Mercer was pacing near the fireplace while the man he’d brought with him—Thomas easily recognized Aaron Black—stood guard near the door.
For Aaron to be there, with Mercer, Thomas knew the situation had to be serious. He’d worked with the ex-SEAL before on cases that didn’t involve hostage rescue. They’d involved cleanup.