His hands clenched as terror tore through him. He had dealt with, and overcome many things in his long, event filled life. But he knew that he could not handle Cassie’s hatred, or condemnation. He needed her smile, her brightness. Now that he knew what it was like to have her light in his life, he could not bear to part with it. He could not go back to that world of loneliness and self hatred.
He would not survive it again.
“You also saved her life then,” he said softly, his gaze darting back to her grandmother as he tried to distract himself from his despairing thoughts.
She studied him for a long moment, disbelief and curiosity flitting across her delicate features. “Yes, I kept her safe, hidden, protected. I kept her alive through The Slaughter.” Pain radiated from her bright eyes as she turned away from him, her hand tightening upon Cassie’s.
“Thank you,” Devon said softly.
She blinked at him in surprise, and then a small smile curled the corner of her full mouth. “You really care about my granddaughter, don’t you?” She sounded completely mystified; it was hard for her to compute that he, a vampire, could care about anything. Let alone that he could care about a Hunter, which was a realization that still mystified him. How could he have not known what Cassie was? What they all were?
Love was truly blind, or at least the people in it were, he realized.
The image of her standing at the side of that clearing, her eyes blazing with hurt and fury, her hand clenched tight around a stake was burned permanently into his mind. She had not been shocked to see him there, not as he had been to see her standing there. Though she seemed to have figured out what he was, he had not been able to put all of the pieces of the puzzle about her together until that moment.
And the pieces of that puzzle were ones that he almost wished did not fit. The woman that he loved, and cherished, was also his sworn enemy. The woman that had brought him back to life had also been created specifically to end it. He still couldn’t quite understand it, and the twisted irony of it was not lost upon him.
Devon met her inquisitive gaze, confusion and hope radiated from her. “Yes,” he admitted honestly. “More than I ever thought possible.”
Her delicate forehead furrowed in confusion as she turned back to Cassie. “I don’t understand any of this,” she whispered.
“We are not all monsters.”
Her gaze darted quickly back to his, her eyes widening slightly as she studied him carefully for a long moment. “No, I suppose not. I’m just going to have to figure out how to process that shocking bit of information.”
He nodded, his hand briefly stroking over Cassie’s arm, relishing in the feel of her satiny skin. She had been out for far longer than he liked. Turning, he moved away from her, stalking toward the door. Pacing back and forth, he tried to lose some of the restless energy clinging to him, even though he had not slept. He wanted her awake, and he needed to know what her reaction to him would be.
Still acutely attuned to the beat of her heart, he felt when it picked up, when she stirred slightly. He froze instantly, his mouth going dry as he waited for his fate to be handed to him. She could not reject him, he would not survive that.
She had to forgive him.
Her grandmother rose swiftly, leaning eagerly over her granddaughter. “Cassie, Cassie can you hear me?”
He could see her lids lift, but he was unable to see the bright color of her eyes. “Grandma?”
The sound of her voice was the sweetest thing he had ever heard. “Yes dear, I’m here. It’s ok; you’re going to be just fine.”
Cassie’s hand grasped hold of her grandmother as the woman bent over to give her a surprisingly fierce hug before pulling slightly away. “Devon? Where’s Devon?”
Her grandmother glanced worriedly at him before taking a small step back. “Here, I’m right here.”
He was surprised to find that he could barely get the words past the tight constriction in his chest and throat. He moved swiftly toward her, eager to see her again, eager to feel her again. Eager to know how she felt about him now. Stopping at her side, his body froze as her brilliant eyes clashed with his. The startling azure violet of them was bright and wounded, the pure amethyst flecks speckled throughout them shone in the harsh light of the room.
“Devon,” she breathed, tears filling her eyes and spilling down her delicate cheeks.
“Shh, don’t cry love.” Bending over her, he gently wiped the tears from her skin, relishing in the feel of her. “Don’t cry.”
“I wanted to kill you,” she whispered, a sob shaking her fragile body. “I thought that you were that… that thing and I wanted to kill you.”
This revelation did not surprise him. He had suspected as much. Though he felt that he should be angered, or feel betrayed by it, he was not. Their kind knew nothing about the vampire’s that did not feed on humans; they knew nothing about the ones that had shunned human blood. All she had known was that a monster was hunting her community, killing people, and somehow she had managed to figure out what he was. She had no way of knowing that he wasn’t a murderer anymore, though at one time he had been even worse than Julian. At one time her assumption about him would have been completely right.
More tears spilled free, coming so fast that he could no longer keep up with wiping them away. Worry for her health seized him as sobs shook her. “Cassie…”
“I wanted to kill you, and you saved my life.” Her face was filled with agony as she seized hold of his hand with surprising strength. “I should have known that you weren’t a monster, I should have trusted you. You would never do anything to hurt me. Please forgive me.”
His body constricted with anguish. He had been worried that she would not forgive him, and instead she was pleading for his forgiveness. It was something that she would never have to do. There was nothing she could do to turn him against her, nothing she could do to make him stop loving her. Gathering her in his arms, he cradled her gently, relishing in the feel of her once more. “There is nothing to forgive Cassie. I was worried that you would not forgive me.”
Her body trembled in his arms. “For what?” she mumbled.
“For what I am.”
A shudder rocked through her as she buried her face in his neck, her tears wetting his skin and shirt. “You are a wonderful man Devon.”
His gut twisted as his grip on her tightened. That was the worst part about all of this, he was not a man, and at one time he had been a brutal monster. He did not know what he had done to deserve her, but he would spend the rest of his life doing everything he could to earn her unwavering love. His hand wrapped into her hair, gently easing through the tangles that marred its golden beauty. Holding her tight, he closed his eyes as she buried herself against him.