But of course that meant he could die now, and Regan looked at him and saw that vulnerability.
She was trying not to let that terrify her, especially given that for most of their relationship, she had thought he was mortal anyway. She hadn’t even known an alternative existed, for him or for anyone else for that matter. But watching him almost bleed to death had made her painfully aware of how much she didn’t want to lose him now that they had found each other.
“I want you to tear me up,” he said, his voice sexy and slumberous from his nap.
She had come into the bedroom to see if he was awake since they had dinner plans with Chris and Nelson, and he was definitely awake. In all areas.
“No.” Regan made the mistake of leaning over to kiss him, and he pulled her down onto the bed. It was warm and cozy and nice lying next to him, and she would have loved to take her clothes off, but she thought it was definitely too soon after his injury and subsequent surgery. “It’s not a good idea.”
His finger stroked across the front of her Capri pants. “It’s been forever.”
“I don’t want to hurt you,” she said, but her protests were growing thinner as his hand slipped inside the front of her pants. It had been weeks and weeks.
“Not being inside you is hurting me,” he murmured in her ear, spooning alongside her, fingers stroking lightly across her clitoris.
Regan laughed. “That’s such a line. I’m not sixteen.” She glanced around their new bedroom, painted a bright cheerful yellow, and tried to change the subject. “I think I need to buy us some new bedding to match this room. I’d like to stay in this house awhile if that’s okay with you.”
“I’ll stay here as long as you want if you let me have sex with you.” Felix was bumping against her backside with his erection in a teasing rhythm that had her shifting restlessly. “If we do it just like this, it won’t pull my stitches. Even my surgeon can’t argue with that. And he said I should expect a full recovery.”
Regan was warring between wanting to be cautious and the need to feel him deep inside her again. It wasn’t just the physical, sexual desire, it was also needing the intimacy, the connection that making love brought to them. She wanted him as close to her as possible, to be able to love him, to express her appreciation to him, to the universe, that they’d been given this second chance.
His finger dipped inside her and she bit her lip. “If it hurts at all, stop immediately,” she told him, trying to sound firm. “We’ll either find a new position or I’ll finish you off.”
Felix started laughing, his shoulders actually shaking.
“What?” she asked, amused at the joy in his voice, craning to see his face.
“You must love me if you’re offering to finish me off... that was very romantic, honey.”
Felix watched the woman he loved make a face at him.
“That didn’t sound right, did it?”
“No,” he agreed. “More like giving me o**l s*x is a chore you suffer through.”
“I like to ...”
Regan paused, and Felix refused to fill in the blank for her. He loved it when she embraced her sexual power instead of shying away from it. If he didn’t speak, she would continue, he knew from experience.
“I like to give you blow jobs. Head. Oral sex. Whatever we’re calling it.” Her fingers ran along the seam of his jeans. “But what I was really trying to say is that I don’t want to hurt you by having sex.”
“I know, and I love you for it. I love you for a lot of reasons. But the pain is gone, and yes, if it hurts, I will stop.” There really wasn’t much discomfort lingering from his wounds. Not that the pain mattered when he was so content, so exhilarated by being with Regan, being mortal, able to love her and be loved in return.
He was a free man.
And he wanted to make love to the woman he had been willing to give his life for.
“Okay ...” she said, her voice reluctant, even as her body shifted forward to make contact with his fingers again.
Felix stroked inside her, closing his eyes to just feel the sensation of lying next to her, his chest against her back, his face buried in her soft hair. “Take your pants off,” he whispered in her ear.
As she complied, Felix unzipped his own jeans and kissed the back of her neck. It was such a new feeling to be this happy, he wasn’t quite sure what to do with it. Just lying in bed beside her brought him a contentment he had never experienced in his whole long and restless life.
When Regan’s skin was blissfully free of clothing, he skimmed his hands over her backside, enjoying the smooth silkiness of her flesh. Shifting her top leg forward, Felix slid inside her, closing his eyes against the rush of ecstasy.
Regan gave a sharp sigh, her head tilting back, and Felix knew that this was perfection, that this moment was worth everything that had come before, that all his sins had allowed him to be here, humble and appreciative.
She moved gently with him, their bodies connected in a hot sensual slide of pleasure, and Felix picked up the rhythm, slipping his finger around to tease her clitoris. Regan came quickly, her cries soft and ragged, and Felix didn’t wait any longer. He pumped hard, gritting his teeth, exploding tight and hard, shattering everything that had come before.
There was only now and tomorrow.
Kissing Regan’s shoulder, he relaxed onto the pillow.
“Are you okay?” she asked.
Her concern was a novelty, and Felix smiled, nuzzling the back of her hair. “I’m fantastic.”
“Good.” She shifted so that she was on her back, facing him. “You know, I’ve always meant to ask you... what was it I felt on my shoulders that first night we met? When you were giving me the reading and it felt like someone was touching me. What was that?”
“I have no idea,” he told her honestly. “I’d like to say it was me, but I never had that kind of power. What do you think it was?”
Her voice was thoughtful. “I think it was the promise that someday your arms would be around me, comforting me ... but that sounds stupid. That’s not possible.”
“Everything is possible.” Felix stroked her hair, studying the varying colors of brown in the sunlight. “Remember I said that voodoo works if you believe... this is the same thing.”
“Then I believe,” she said, shifting so she was completely facing him. “I believe.”
So he did.
And he knew they weren’t just talking about invisible arms.