“I could never be sorry,” he whispered, his lips brushing over mine.
“Come on,” I said, drawing him along behind me to pick up the pizza and walk toward the bed. “You need to eat.”
After he had eaten the entire pizza (he shared) and we were settled back beneath the covers, he spoke so quietly I hardly heard him. “Tell me how you found Riley.”
I knew this question was coming. I tried to convince myself Sam wouldn’t be upset that I went and found Riley. I told myself he wouldn’t care. Not only had I been lying to everyone else, I had also been lying to myself.
I saw the way Sam looked at Riley when we were in hell. Sam didn’t want Riley here, for reasons that I didn’t completely understand. And after seeing Sam’s back and the blood in his cell… I felt worse than ever. If Riley hadn’t been here, if he hadn’t spent the night with me, Sam might not have to carry those scars for the rest of his life.
Sam sat up and looked down at me. “I can feel your hesitation.”
“Because when you find out everything I’ve done…”
He laughed. “There’s nothing you could have done that’s that terrible.”
I robbed your mind, I said, unable to get the words past my lips.
He frowned. “What?”
I sat up, throwing my legs over the bed and letting my feet dangle off the side. “I didn’t realize what was happening at first. I still don’t get how I do it, but whenever I touch someone and I want to know something, I somehow go into their mind and see their memories.”
“When did this happen?”
“One night when we were closely linked and we were talking. I asked you if you knew where your roommates were and just like that, I saw your memories. I saw the note that was in the center of the bed. Peaks Island.”
His eyes rounded a bit, realizing there was no other way I would know this. He got up from the bed and began pacing the room. It stung a little that he didn’t sit next to me, but then I decided maybe it was better this way. “What else did you see?”
I shrugged. “Nothing. It freaked me out and I felt guilty for doing that to you so I pulled out.”
“Have you done this to anyone else?”
I bit my lip and nodded. “To Cole, I looked down at my feet. I really needed to paint my toenails. Some cheerful color. “We were talking about him and Gemma, then his voice just went away and I could see and feel everything from his point of view. It was weird.”
“Wow. Does he know?”
“Yeah. He wasn’t even mad.” It still shocked me.
“Why would he be mad?”
“Aren’t you?”
The corner of his mouth lifted into a lopsided smile. “Sweetheart, you’re in my mind every single day. I love it.”
His words sent a rush of warmth through me. “Yeah, but this time was different.”
“Guess I’ll have to be more selective with my thoughts when you’re touching me. Wouldn’t want you to discover my deep dark secrets.” He winked as he crouched down in front of me, slowly reached out and grasped my foot in his palm.
“What deep dark secrets?” I narrowed my eyes and smiled.
He smiled, then released me and stood. “So you found Riley from that note you saw in my memory?”
The mention of Riley made my stomach dip. “Actually, he kind of found me. I went to Peaks Island to look for him, but I had no idea who I was looking for. I know I’d seen them—your roommates—before, but I never paid attention to them. I had no idea what they looked like.”
“Bet Riley really loved that,” he said smugly.
“He did seem annoyed.”
Sam flashed his perfectly straight, white teeth.
“Anyway,” I said, reminding myself not to get distracted. “I ran into some trouble on the docks.”
“What kind of trouble?” The words rumbled from his chest and I swear he seemed to swell in front of me. How had he grown so much in the past eight days?
“There were these fishermen. They were just playing around. Nothing happened,” I hurried out.
He didn’t seem to believe me. “Just tell me.”
“They made some advances and I fended them off. I ran onto the ferry and that was it.” He nodded and I kept talking. “Riley climbed onto the boat after it moved away from the docks. He said he saw me looking for him and he wanted to know where you were. I told him what was going on and he agreed to come here and help.”
“He agreed, just like that?” He seemed surprised.
“Yes. I don’t understand why you and Gemma don’t trust him.”
“Gemma doesn’t trust him, either?”
I explained about Gemma’s past and her connection to Riley and how she trained him. He nodded thoughtfully as I talked, settling next to me on the bed. When I was finished, he said, “I didn’t put it together, but the moves she taught me… I’ve seen him do them before.”
“She says he’s a killer.”
“He is,” Sam said matter-of-factly.
“So you don’t like Riley because he’s a killer?” I asked, a hard knot forming in my belly.
He sighed. “That would be a little hypocritical, don’t you think?”
“I don’t understand, then.”
“It’s not that he kills. It’s how he kills.”
It was my turn to not understand.
“He likes it, Hev. Sometimes he kills because he has to, but mostly he does it because he enjoys it. There’s something about him that’s twisted… He’s violent.”
The image of him at the cemetery this afternoon flashed into my mind. He had the upper hand. He could have just punched through that demon’s chest, but he didn’t. He cut off its head and then threw the body away like it was nothing. “The curse,” I said to myself.
“The curse?” Sam echoed.
“Right before we got you back, Gemma told me that Riley’s family line is cursed with servitude to Beelzebub. She thinks the reason he’s so mean is because of the curse.” I explained to Sam in detail about Riley’s grandfather and the deal he made with Beelzebub all those years ago.
“So Riley works for Beelzebub?” Sam said thoughtfully when I finished talking. He went to the fridge and pulled out a water.
“I don’t think it’s like that,” I said, feeling like I was betraying Sam with my feelings. I liked Riley. I went to grab a water too, but Sam handed me his before I could open the fridge door.