At night, I would lie in bed alone, longing to get up and go to him, wanting so badly for him to quench my thirst for his body. Sometimes he would snore so loudly that I would lie there and giggle because he sounded like a lawnmower.
And now he was gone.
There would be no more messes in the kitchen. No more singing that reached my soul. No more giggles.
My body would still want him. My body would crave him until I died. It was a bold statement, but I knew it was true because he was the first man who ever taught me about passion, about the kind of pleasure a man could evoke from a woman.
But even still, I couldn’t bring myself to betray Max like that.
How could I move on, living a life that made me insanely happy, when I realized that my life with Max had been anything but?
And to make it worse, the man who seemed to be able to give me the happiness that Max never could was his own brother, his other half.
Wiping the flowing tears off my cheeks, I jumped down off the counter, my knees threatening to buckle beneath me. With another sob racking my body, I flung myself across the couch, feeling as if the pain was going to rip me in two.
I wished Max was here. I needed my best friend.
I remembered the letter. The folded single piece of paper that was in the envelope with the flash drive he mailed me. I shoved off the couch and hurried into the bedroom, where I put it in a drawer when I was getting clothes to take to the hospital when Tucker was there.
I couldn’t believe I forgot about it until now.
My hand closed around the paper and I sat down on the edge of the bed, wiping away another tear. I unfolded the wrinkled paper and looked down.
It was a letter. Written by hand, by Max.
Tears welled anew, just looking down at the last thing he would ever tell me. Looking at the last words I would ever know from him.
With a sniffle, I focused. And I began to read:
Charlotte,
If you’re reading this, then I’m likely dead. I’m sorry I never told you, but I was approached by the FBI to gather evidence against Wallace (Jr. and Sr.) for corporate espionage. They aren’t the only ones guilty within the company, but they are the main players. I found the evidence the Feds need, Charlotte. And now my life is in danger.
Please forgive me for never telling you about this. I did it for your protection. If you had known, they would be after you too.
Unfortunately, I must send you this because I’m afraid I won’t be able to deliver it myself. I trust you more than anyone else in this town, and I know you will make sure these men are brought to justice.
Give this flash drive to Agent Carson of the FBI. He will know what to do.
Also, I’m sending for Tucker, my twin. If there is anyone that can keep you safe until you can deliver it, it’s him. You can trust him. He’s the best man I know. You’re going to like him. He’s exactly the kind of guy you need. He’s the yin to your yang. The sugar to your coffee. Please tell him that even though we drifted apart over the years, he will always be my other half. My better half.
You and I… we’re very similar, aren’t we? It was easy to be together because we never challenged the other. We coexisted, but we never really united as a couple.
I’m not saying this to hurt you. I love you. I always will. I’m telling you this because I want you to have more in your life. The light in your eyes fades a little bit more every day, Charlotte. Now that I am faced with death, I realize that there is so much more to life than work. My time might be over, but yours, yours can just be beginning.
Use my death as a catalyst, a catalyst for great change, great happiness. For then, my death will serve a greater purpose.
You’re my best friend, Charlotte. I want you to be happy. When you find love—when you find the man who makes you feel alive, grab hold of him and don’t let go.
I love you always,
Max
The letter fell from my grasp and drifted to the floor. How horrible it must have been for him to think he was going to die. Yet Max approached it the same way he did everything else: with direct and methodical planning.
My heart hurt for him; my entire chest physically throbbed.
Beneath all the pain and sorrow, under the tears and guilt, I realized something else from Max’s letter. He felt the same way I did. He realized we didn’t have an epic love story; he realized we were more like best friends than anything else.
And he had been right.
We did coexist. We were like roommates who shared a bed, business partners who collaborated at home. And there was nothing wrong with that. It worked for us. We were something to each other that no one had ever been: best friends.
And in the face of his death, Max knew he had to tell me. He understood that I would be loyal to him even if it meant being alone.
He’s the yin to your yang. The sugar in your coffee.
Max knew I would fall for Tucker. He approved.
A huge weight lifted off me just then, relieving me of my guilt and regret. Loving Max didn’t mean pushing Tucker away, just as loving Tucker didn’t mean not loving Max.
I had a feeling that the love I developed for Tucker would be as different as the love I felt for Max as the brothers were in personality.
I let him leave.
I let my future walk out that door. I turned him away.
I gasped and bolted off the bed, rushing through the apartment for the front door. Maybe he was still outside. Maybe he hadn’t gotten a cab yet.
Maybe I could still catch him.
The door bounced off the wall when I flung it open and I barreled into the hallway, barefoot and all. “Tucker!” I yelled, knowing he couldn’t hear me from outside but unable to keep his name from erupting from my chest.
Someone moved in the hallway and I gasped, stumbling backward.
Tucker pushed away from the wall he had been leaning against and faced me. “I was beginning to think you weren’t coming.”
A strangled sound somewhere between a moan and a laugh escaped me. I ran to him, racing across the carpet, and smashed into his chest. He chuckled as my arms wound around him beneath the leather jacket he was wearing and my fingers linked behind his back.
“Careful, darlin’,” he grunted, and I gentled my hold around the area that was still healing.
“I never should have let you leave.” I sobbed against his chest.
“I know.”
“I thought I was betraying Max.” I buried my face in the soft leather and inhaled. He smelled incredible.
“I know.”
I laughed. “Is there anything you don’t know?”
He bent, hooking an arm beneath my legs and swinging me up into his arms. “Yeah, I don’t know why we’re still standing out here.”