For all the times she wished her sensitive hearing would stay turned on, she now wished she could cut it off-permanently. One only assumed you wanted to hear what was being whispered behind your back.
Staring at her hands resting on the table, she knew part of her bad mood was due to her hurting for Holiday. Kylie wanted to help her, but Holiday insisted on being alone.
The computer dinged with an incoming e-mail. Kylie rushed over, praying it would be from her grandfather or great-aunt. She'd been checking obsessively, especially since her earlier e-mail had bounced back ... meaning the address she had for them was no longer active.
She dropped into the desk chair, her breath held, as she opened the screen.
Not from her grandfather or aunt.
She stared at her stepdad's e-mail address and accidentally clicked it open. Then she accidentally read it.
Hey, princess, I'm looking forward to seeing you Saturday. Miss you. Miss your mom.
All the emotions over her mom and dad's divorce came hurtling back. She jumped up so fast the chair slammed against the floor and broke into four different pieces. "Screw it!" she bellowed. Throat tightening with emotion, she stomped over and yanked open the fridge. She waited to feel the cool air hit her face.
It didn't feel cold, because she was too cold. She was a freaking vampire!
She swatted a tear from her cheek and looked back to the computer. What if her stepdad started asking questions about her mom again? Kylie sure as heck didn't want to be the one to drop the bomb that her mom was dating.
Then again, he was probably going to find out Saturday anyway. She'd already gotten an e-mail from Mom asking Kylie if she minded if Creepy Guy-the one who wanted to take her mom to England and bang her senseless-came to parent day.
Kylie had been a breath away from e-mailing her mom back and saying, Hell yes, I mind.
But was it fair to rain on her mom's parade? Shouldn't Kylie be content that her mom was happy? Kylie just wished her mom could be happy back with her stepdad. Wished life could go back to the way things were before.
For a second, she remembered how things had been. Her thinking she was nothing but human, her not knowing things such as vampires and werewolves existed.
Her having never known Derek. Her never reconnecting with Lucas.
Her, without Della or Miranda.
Suddenly, Kylie Galen's world before Shadow Falls didn't seem so desirable. Well, except having her mom and stepdad together.
Kylie heard Della's mattress shift and her footsteps pad against the floor. Kylie did another swipe of her face, hoping to hide the watery evidence. Vampires didn't cry.
"There's some B-positive blood that I brought you behind the milk," Della said.
"Thanks."
"How are you feeling?" Della asked.
"Fine. Why?"
Della moved in some more. "Because usually when someone starts ripping apart furniture, they don't feel so well."
Kylie stared at the broken chair and didn't reply.
"Actually, I'm just surprised that you didn't have any symptoms during the turning stage. I'm glad you didn't, because believe me, it's not fun."
Kylie reached for the blood. "You know, this probably won't last."
"The blood?" Della asked. "I can get more."
"No, me being vampire. I'm not really vampire. I mean, I'm only part vampire."
"You look full-blooded," Della said, and then, "How do you change it?" She moved to the kitchen table.
Kylie opened the bottle and suddenly the idea of drinking the blood turned her stomach. Had she already changed into something else? Oh, great! If so, she couldn't wait until breakfast when everyone would have another field day making fun of her.
Closing the cap, attempting to hide her nausea from Della, she said, "I don't understand how it works. How to make it happen, how to make it not happen."
She faced Della. "Am I still vampire?"
Della nodded, and Kylie saw from the girl's expression that she could tell Kylie had been crying.
"Go ahead and say it," Kylie said. "I'm supposed to be a badass now that I'm a vamp."
"I don't care if you're badass," Della said with sincerity.
Frustration welled up inside Kylie because she was being a bitch, because Della was being nice, but mostly because she couldn't go running to Holiday for answers this time.
Holiday didn't have the answers. And the people who did, her grandfather and aunt, didn't want anything to do with Shadow Falls and were now "undeliverable."
A chameleon alone will not survive.
And right now, Kylie felt very alone.
More tears flowed and Kylie swiped at her cheeks. "I hate feeling like a freak," Kylie bellowed out. "I hate feeling as if I have no control over my own body."
Her thoughts went to Hannah. And to Hannah's concern that someone was out to hurt Holiday. And I'm tired of people dying.
"Your grandfather didn't tell you how to ... handle it?"
Kylie let go of a deep sigh. "He said it would take years for me to learn."
"So you're going to go around changing from thing to thing without being able to control it?"
"That's the way he made it sound. I don't know." Kylie dropped into a chair.
After a pregnant pause, Della asked, "What did you think of your grandfather?"
"What do you mean?"
"I mean, did you like him, not like him? Was he some old fart with one foot in the grave?"
"No, he wasn't ... that old. And he seemed nice. He looked like my dad. But reminded me a little of Burnett, serious and stern."
"But?" Della said, making it sound like a question.
"I didn't say 'but.'"
"Yeah, but you looked like you were thinking it."
Kylie exhaled. "If I tell you something, will you not say anything ... to anyone?"
"Cross my cold heart," Della said. "And promise not to cry. Especially if I look half as bad as you do when I do it," she said, as if attempting to coax a smile out of Kylie.
Kylie didn't smile. She couldn't. "He wants me to go live with them."
Della's eyes widened and the humor quickly faded. "You're not going to do it, are you?"
"No," Kylie said. "I don't think so."
Right then, she heard her grandfather's voice again. Come with us. We'll help you understand everything. You need to learn who and what you are, Kylie.
"Don't think so?" Della repeated Kylie's words. "That sounds like you're considering it."
"No," Kylie said.
And she wasn't, she told herself. She really wasn't.