Then her heart reminded her that Lucas hadn't shown up last night, despite the fact he'd told her he would. That pretty much made it official. The dark side, the bad mood, had won. Glancing back up at the ceiling, she couldn't help but notice there were indeed more shadows than sunlight.
For some crazy reason, she remembered Nana telling her to enjoy her childhood because soon enough she'd be an adult. Was this adulthood? To wake up every day and know it would bring both good and bad? To do things you had to do, even if you wished you didn't have to do them?
Then she recalled another piece of Nana's advice. Just remember, sweetie, sometimes we can't change what happens, but we can change how we let those things affect us.
"Easier said than done, Nana." Kylie inhaled a big gulp of frustration and the sweet smell of roses tickled her senses. Turning her head, she saw the single pink rose on her nightstand. The memory of Lucas having robbed his grandmother's rose garden and filling Kylie's room with roses sent her bad mood on time-out. Then, seeing the note beside the rose, she sat up and reached for the slip of paper.
Kylie,
Sorry I was late. Something came up and I had to go visit my dad. You were out like a light when I got here. But damn, you are so beautiful when you sleep. If Della hadn't heard me opening your window and poked her head in and shot me the bird for waking her up-she's impossible-I would have climbed in bed with you just to feel you next to me.
You have no idea how much I'd like that. To feel you against me. All of you.
Sweet dreams,
Lucas
Kylie reached for the rose and placed it to her nose. The sweet scent made her smile. Maybe the bad mood wasn't going to win after all.
* * *
Kylie reconsidered her positive attitude when a couple of hours later, she batted at the bugs swarming around her as she moved into the woods with Holiday and Burnett. But it wasn't the bugs causing the deterioration of her good mood. It was one certain dark-haired, blue-eyed werewolf.
Kylie should have been excited about going to the falls. She always felt better after a visit. But right now, she didn't want to feel better. She wanted to feel ... mad.
Wait. She didn't want to feel it, she did feel mad.
Mad at the rose-leaving, note-writing were.
She'd completely let go of her aggravation about Lucas not showing up last night. She'd tried to set aside the fact that he'd practically told her he had to keep secrets from her. While she didn't like it, she'd even accepted that Fredericka, his one-time sex buddy, would always be within touching distance of him, when Kylie wasn't anywhere close enough to touch him herself. She had worked at overcoming the fact that his grandmother, his father, and even his entire pack, were against their being together.
She'd done a lot of setting aside, overcoming, and accepting. And after this morning, she realized that it might have been too much-because after not showing up last night, after hardly seeing her yesterday, he'd barely acknowledged her this morning in the cafeteria.
Another mosquito buzzed past and she swiped at the air, sending the pest headfirst into a tree. Bzzz ... splat!
Couldn't Lucas have come over and had breakfast with her? She wouldn't have even blamed him if he'd brought Clara with him. But no, all she'd gotten was a smile, and even that smile had seemed somehow purposefully short. Then he'd joined the were table with all his other friends, his pack-people who clearly came before her now and probably always would.
Last night, he'd climbed into her bedroom way after midnight while she'd been asleep. He'd left her a rose and a sweet note, and this morning all she'd gotten from him was a half-assed smile. What was up with that?
She sure as hell didn't know. Who was she kidding? She knew exactly what was up. She wasn't good enough for him, because she wasn't a were.
That stung. Really stung. Then, to make matters worse, when Derek sat beside her, Lucas had the audacity to text her and say he didn't like it.
Right. He didn't like the fact that Derek had sat beside her, but he'd chosen not to sit with her. Instead, his sexy little butt was sandwiched between Fredericka and one of the new female weres, who was all over Lucas to the point that even Fredericka was unhappy about it.
Yeah, Kylie could hear Lucas telling her that he no longer cared about Fredericka. She could hear him saying that he hadn't asked the new girl to sit beside him, and she could hear him saying he had to be loyal to his pack. And maybe Kylie was wrong to feel angry, or maybe she wasn't so much angry as she was just tired of playing second fiddle.
Second fiddle sucked.
Another mosquito bit the dust when she swiped it off her cheek.
"You might want to slow down," Burnett said, moving up beside her with his long-legged strides.
Kylie glanced at him. He studied her briefly, then shifted his gaze back to the terrain as if expecting something to jump out at them. He'd been acting antsy since they walked into the woods, not that Kylie paid too much attention; her heart had been too busy fiddling with her second fiddle matters to care if Burnett had drunk too much caffeine.
"Seriously, slow down," Burnett said.
"Why?" Kylie asked.
He briefly glanced over his shoulder again. "As wonderful as faes are, they're slow."
Kylie sighed. She hadn't realized that she was moving at a fast sprint. A non-human sprint. A non-witch sprint, too. Which meant she wasn't really a witch, right? Glancing back, she saw Holiday power walking to keep up.
"Sorry." Kylie slowed down and noticed how Burnett kept looking around as if he expected something to jump out at them. Had something happened? And if so, did it have anything to do with her?
Holiday's footfalls sounded beside Kylie. She glanced from the nervous vampire to Holiday.
"Thanks for slowing down," Holiday said, sounding a bit breathless. In less than a minute, Burnett lagged behind them, just out of vampire hearing range. Probably at Holiday's insistence. No doubt she wanted to talk with Kylie, and Holiday didn't like knowing he'd listen in.
The verdant smells of the forest filled Kylie's senses. For the first time since she entered the woods she recalled her grandfather and the fog. She immediately tried to listen with her heart to see if she felt the calling sensation from before; it wasn't there. Then she wondered if somehow the whole fog episode was behind Burnett's edginess. Or even worse, had they tried to return and set off the alarms? Would Burnett even tell her about it if they had?
Probably not.
She looked back at Burnett. What did the vamp know?
Moving closer to Holiday, Kylie asked, "Can you tell me something and be honest about it?"
Holiday's footsteps on moist earth made squishy sounds, as if Kylie's question had added a weight to her step. "I don't lie to you."